Just a Mission
by Iris Elena
Summary: What If Nikita wasn't in division, she got clean by Carla, and was a normal civilian? Told from pretty much everybody's POV... Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**Hilo! I'm new at this stuff so go easy on me! Enjoy!**

** Just a Mission**

"**Micheal" "Percy" I mimicked his tone, " I have a mission for you… You'll be going on an overseas, undercover mission. You will be spying on a couple in London. They evidently have a nuclear materials stash and I want to know who they're dealing to. You will be briefed tomorrow" I just nodded in agreement. **

** After I got home, all I could think about was the lives of my wife and daughter that had been taken away from me in a car bomb. Every day since then I haven't felt my heart beat for love. Only revenge. It seemed sad, but the only thing keeping me alive was the mouth-watering thought that one of these days, Percy will help me get the man who killed the only two people I had ever loved. I just blocked all thoughts so that I could get a good nights' sleep.**

** "Michael, here's all the details you'll need to know for your upcoming mission. And did you hear what Wade did to that recruit? Pretty brutal huh?" "What happened?" " He beat him to death because he failed a mission. I wonder if Percy will punish him or not." " Hmm." I wonder.**

** I looked over the details. My targets names were Alice, and Ronnie. They looked normal, in a criminal kind of way. Alice: a blonde 5'6 medium sized, 25 year old looking women. Ronnie: a brunette, 5'8, 30 looking guy. They looked fine. As I walked to Percy's office with the tablet still in my hand, I saw that I missed a detail. They wanted me to date someone as my cover. Her name was Nikita. Nikita Mears.**

** Hello**

**I walked in Percy's office with a mask that said "I am a robot" but in reality I didn't want to have a cover girlfriend. I love Elizabeth and I promised her that I would never be with ANYONE else. I intend to keep that promise til I get my revenge. Maybe after that I may get some closure and move on but I doubt it. Lizzie was a once in a lifetime kind of girl. I will love her til' the day I die. Little did I know Percy wasn't too fond of the idea either.**

**Amanda's POV:**

**I couldn't believe the same Nikita that Carla knew was in the exact place of Michael's mission. Little did Michael know that he was completing 2 missions in one trip. " Percy, I think we should get Michael to get close enough to this "Nikita" so that we can find out if we can get Michael's happiness back" " Oh Amanda, you may be smart but this idea could become reckless. Michael should just take another agent as his cover so that they can both be professional's. We don't need a civilian getting into this mess. She may blow his cover. I do have special plans for Michael, so I think we should keep our ends tied on this one" I wasn't giving up without a fight and I had one last trick up my sleeve. "Did I mention, Nikita is friends with the Baker's? She could get us a faster, and safer way into their inner circle." Percy had an open minded glint in his eyes, and he finally agreed to my terms, just as Michael walked in the room.**

**Michael's POV:**

**I walked into Percy's office and asked him the question I'm sure he was expecting. "Sir, why am I dating a civilian, Nikita, on this mission?" " Ah, Michael" he stepped towards me with this amused look on his face. What the hell was he up to? "She is merely a quicker way into the Baker's inner circle. Now go on and get packed up. You leave in 24 hours but you'll need to get your items, and Birkhoff will let you know where you'll meet Nikita, and your targets. Now go" As I was at the door his voice stopped me," Oh and Michael, don't get used to asking questions."**

**I just got onto the plane and reviewed what I had to do. Nikita does yoga at a community center and I'm supposed to meet her there 5 hours after I landed. I decided to sleep before I landed since I probably wouldn't get much shut eye when I got "home", which was 6 miles away from my targets and 2 houses away from Nikita's. As I thought about the women's life I would most likely ruin, I drifted off to sleep.**

**I was at home now and put up surveillance gadgets that only Birkhoff could monitor and got set up at the place I would call "home" for about a year now that 'I had to get to know Nikita. **

**I woke up exactly 3 hours before the meet with Nikita and spent one hour doing some extra research on her. She was adopted til she was 4, then given' to another family who took her in until she was 17. She ran away a year after her foster mother died and from the details from Divisions private little data base, she was on all kinds of drugs. It says that she got clean by a woman whose name is marked classified. Well that's strange. Anyways it seems weird that a women with such joy in her life couldn't have been raped, beaten, or any of these things but I guess she's just stronger than she looks.**

**Speaking of looks, I can't even remember being this blown away by a women's beauty since Lizzie. Nikita is perfectly fit, long dark ad night hair, and the sexiest body a man could ever dream of. I can't even imagine how in the world she's single. Anyways I've done enough research on her. Probably too much since I'm supposed to be just meeting her today. I hopped in the shower, got dressed in the appropriate clothes and walked to my destination (since it mentions that Nikita loves the outdoors.) **

**When I got to the place I didn't immediately see her but when she walked in, my jaw dropped. She wasn't wearing anything super sexy, it was just that she herself, was super sexy. She was wearing this yellow sports bra, then she wore black leggings and these flats that made her look like she was bare foot. She wore her hair in a high ponytail, and with a curly ponytail. She looked absolutely breathe taking. I was so taken aback by her beauty that I didn't notice her right in front of me. " Umm, hi. Didn't anybody ever tell you it's rude to stare?" she said with this smartass tone that made me smirk. " Oh sorry. I was just , uh, never mind. I'm Michael by the way." "Nikita" She shook my hand with such firmness that caught me off guard. " So, I've never seen you here. Are you new?" "Uh, yeah I just moved here from New York." "Oh. Well are you new to town?" " Yeah". We continued on like that for a while. What Nikita's bio didn't mention was how down to earth, nice, caring, and selfless she was. She was also a vegetarian, and had a puppy named Kota. She was like a saint being caught up with a guy like me. For the first time in years, I began to feel something almost warm in my heart.**

**After the yoga, I was walking and caught up with her. She invited me to coffee with one of her friends Ilse. We were walking there when Ilse faked forgetting to have other plans so me and Nikita went ahead and had coffee. After we spent hours laughing and talking I walked her home when she realized I lived near her " Oh my gosh this is soo weird. We live near each other, and go to the same coffee place. It's like fate or something!" "Yeah you could say that" She giggled, and it was like music to my ears. When we got to her door I asked the thing that I had to, but also wanted to ask her. " Nikita, I know I just met you today but, would you like to accompany me to dinner sometime?" She gave me this un readable look, then replied " I would love that" She smiled and instead of kissing her, which I'm guessing she expected, I moved pass her and opened the door for her. " Goodnight Nikita" She smirked and replied "Goodnight Michael" And closed the door behind her. As I walked home I could almost feel like I was starting to recover from my injuries in my heart. How this women could effect me in such ways, is a mystery to me. But for now I'm going to focus on what I'm going to do on my first date with Nikita.**

**Like it? Shout out to my friend "The Little things in Life" or Ilse. I'll try to keep you're character totally in character. Love ya!**


	2. Dates

Paste your document here...

Okay hello you guys! So you know when you read something about someone starting a relationship and the author skips all the dating parts? Well I hate that soo I'm going to give you ALL there dates right below. Oh and I don't own Nikita, or any of the characters. Yada yada yada. Anyways, Enjoy!

Dates

First date:

I was getting ready for my first date with Nikita when I realized I was nervous. I kept thinking about what this supposed to be tiny relationship, was going to lead to. Honestly, I was never good at keeping my feelings out of it. When I had to seduce my first target, Macy, I kept on thinking about how much this would screw up her life. I was playing her boy toy while she was married to an older man. We slept together for a while, and she ended up falling for me. She never got the chance to tell me because I killed her husband a few days after I saw that "I love you" look in her eyes. After we slept together, I went into her husband's room and killed him. To my surprise, she saw the whole thing. I'll never forget seeing the look in her eyes of "I love you Michael" turn into "I hate you soo much!" I thought she would be a loose end, and it didn't feel right killing her after what she just saw, so I threatened her instead. I told her if she ever told anyone about this, I would be forced to kill her.

Its funny how much time can fly because by the time I looked up, and got out of my haze I was at Nikita's door with Calla lilies in my hand, and my finger on her doorbell. She opened the door, and my jaw actually dropped. She was wearing this backless, red, silky dress that hit right above her knees. She wore matching stilettos. Her speaking snapped me out of my gawking. "Hi Michael. Are those for me?" I looked up at her eyes and saw something even more beautiful: her face. She had light makeup but she was gorgeous. "Uh, yeah. I didn't know what you're favorite kinds were, so I took a lucky guess." As she walked to go put the flowers in a vase, I looked around her house and I wasn't really surprised by what I saw. She had a faint yellow paint on her walls, pictures EVERYWHERE, and she had dog toys all over the place. She came back to the door and I escorted her to where we were eating.

I ordered my food and realized I hadn't complimented her yet. I took her hand in mine, and said "Nikita, you look absolutely amazing." I guess I said something really touching because her smile stretched across her whole face. "Thank you. You don't look too shabby yourself." She winked at me, and that's when we got into like a million different conversations. After our food was all eaten up, I escorted my date to the car. Like a perfect gentlemen, I opened the door for her. She said 'thank you' with a smile. When we were driving home, this terrible song came on. Me and Nikita made eye contact, and we both burst out laughing. We laughed until I pulled up in her driveway.

I hopped out of the car, opened the door for her, and I held my hand out to her. She graciously took it and stepped out of the car. "You are such a perfect gentlemen. I hope it's real and not an act." That made me smile. It's as if she doesn't realize her worth. She deserves everything life could give her. "It's definitely not an act. I just like making you smile." When we got to her door, I again leaned in, but this time it wasn't to open the door. I kissed her. It was slow, and surprisingly, I felt a spark. As if the world wanted us to be together. I never wanted this feeling to end. When I ran out of breathe, I slowly pulled away. When I saw Nikita's eyes, I realized she felt it too. I cupped her cheek and said "Goodnight Nikita." She was obviously still stunned by the kiss and just said "Yeah, uh, goodnight Michael." When I heard the door close, I did something that I never did before. I walked in this sort if giddy way, and had this dumb smile on my face. I did this all the way to the car, and headed home.

The next day, when I saw Nikita, I gave her a warm romantic hug. She pulled away, and took my hands into hers, intertwining our fingers "Hi. I had a fantastic time last night." She smiled with so much more happiness then when I first met her. "I did too. I was so caught up in, well YOU, I forgot to ask," She cut me off "Yes" I felt the need to peck her lips so I did," I was wondering if you would like to accompany me in a romantic picnic this afternoon?" She looked like she was indecisive "I would love to" I smiled and just stood there a little longer staring at her. "Okay," I said "I'll pick you up in 3 hours…. Oh and bring a bikini" She gave me an amused look and said "Yeah, cuzz' you would LOOVE that." She winked at me and walked away.

Second date:

An hour before I picked Nikita up, I realized it's actually been 2 days since I've thought about Lizzie, and Hailey. Nikita seems to be like my heart medicine because she's healing me right up without me even realizing it. I suddenly realized that I'm starting to care about her. I mean why wouldn't I? She's smart, funny, a very smart-ass tone, and just the most beautiful heart, and soul. She's really changing me for the better. I actually think that maybe, in another life, me and her could have been together forever. Lying together, kissing each other, holding each other, and loving each other.

I rush to get my trunks on, and throw on a t-shirt. I run out the door with the basket and run over to Nikita's house.

We decided to take her Jeep to the beach since it will get us into the whole outdoorsy vibe.

I was driving and looked over to see Nikita doing something I never expected her to do. This nice, elegant, women was dancing like a party girl. It was very ironic to watch. She rubbed off on me and I began to dance. It felt so free, and fun. I don't think I've ever felt this comfortable with any civilian before.

When we got to the beach it was almost sunset. Nobody else was there so we could do more without the worry if knocking someone over or anything. I grabbed her hand and ran her 1 meter away from the shoreline and we set our picnic up. After we ate, she actually fed me a grape. Nikita and me are really comfortable with each other so it's easy to hang with her. I also really want her to be my girlfriend.

After she accidently got whipped cream on my nose I said "It's on," and I chased her around the beach. She kept on laughing this gorgeous laugh and it made my heart melt. Suprizingly she was fast but not faster than me. I caught her from behind and spun her. I ran to the beach and threw us both under the water. She jumped at the coolness, and when we got from under the water, I captured her lips. We made out for what felt like eternity, but was only 30 minutes. I pulled her in between my legs, and hugged her from behind as we watched the sunset. Me and her both could not stop smiling.

After the sun had set, and me and Nikita were gazing at each other, she shivered. I grabbed the blanket, wrapped around her back and pulled her into me for a hug. "So, do you want to be my girlfriend?" She pulled away, grabbed my face, and gave me the most passionate kiss we've ever shared. She pulled away and said "I thought you'd never ask." My heart felt so warm at that moment. I lifted her up and spun her around. We were both laughing at how happy we were. I know it's only been a few days but I am definitely falling in love with her. We spent the rest of the day cuddling, in the sand, laughing, she even got on my back. When I'm with her, it feels so right, yet so wrong. I think she's definitely turning out to be more than just a mission. She's more of my actual girlfriend. I actually forgot this was a mission until I got home later that night.

When I got home, I looked at my computer and I had 2 emails. One frome Birkhoff just saying hi, the other from Amanda asking for a debrief. But what caught my eye was that Amanda was asking a lot of questions about Nikita. It's like she actually knew her or something. That's impossible though. Amanda doesn't get out a lot and if she did know her, why wouldn't she just meet up with her directly? All I know is that as of today, I will try with all my might to protect Nikita, no matter what.

That morning I woke up from a dream about Nikita. We were married and had kids, and there was no division, no brutal pasts, just us. How I wished the dream was a reality. It would definitely be the worst thing in the world to be with her forever.

While I was taking a shower, I got this pang of worry in my chest. My instincts aren't usually wrong so the first thing I did was go over to Nikita's. When I got there, I rang the doorbell like 50 times. After 51, I got so worried that I decided to break down the door. When I looked around the first thing I saw was Kota barking like crazy. When I looked in the direction he was looking, my heart fell right out of my chest.


	3. Hospital Bed

What I saw shocked me. There was my strong Nikita, on the ground, unconscious. I rushed to her side and checked her pulse. "Thank God!" She had a pulse, but Lord knows why this happened, so I needed to get her to a hospital. I picked her up and kissed her forehead."Nikita, babe, I'll get you to safety. I promise!" I rushed her to a Hospital, and yelled, "Somebody, please HELP!" Like 3 doctors rushed to me and said "Oh guys, It's not a big deal. It's just Nikita." What the Hell? How did they know her? Was she a regular here? As they put on a stretcher, I held her hand as long as I could. They told me I had to let her go, but I just ignored them. At one point they had 3 guys trying to make me let go of her. Finally, I let her go and broke down on the ground. It wasn't the fact that 'she was here and I didn't know why' that was upsetting me. It was the fact that she was a regular here. Why would she need to come here so often?

When I saw Ilse, I realized I forgot to call Nikita's best looked as worried as me. "Michael, oh thank god! What the hell happened?" I was stunned. Her emotions turned from relief to fear in 2 milliseconds."I have no idea! I walked in her house to see her unconscious. Do you know why because I'm starting to get pissed that EVERYONE knows what's wrong with my girlfriend, but me?" She looked confused, and I'm guessing it's because Nikita didn't tell her we were exclusive."Wait what? You two are-" she was cut off by the doctor."Hello Ilse. You'll be happy to know your friend is perfectly fine, just needs to not go that long without taking care of her meds. We have a bigger problem though." I looked at Ilse and she mouthed 'no'. The doctor and her both knew what had been going on. "Yes it's happening again. I don't think she'll be able to fight it again. I'm very sorry." By this time Ilse is already in tears. I'm sure Nikita would want me to comfort her friend, so I did. I hugged her and tried to calm her down. We stayed like that for a while. When the doctor came back he said that Nikita was awake, and that we could see her. I asked Ilse if I could see her first, and she let me. I walked to Nikita's room only to see a ghostly looking Nikita. She looked pale, and had bags under her eyes. She was sleeping so I pulled a chair up to her bed, and held her hand as tight as I thought I could without waking her up. I was wrong, and she woke up.

"Michael, babe, too tight." I looked up and kissed every inch of her face."Nikita! Oh my God don't ever scare me like that, EVER again!" She tried to reassure me with her smile, but I think we both dreaded the next thing I had to ask."Baby, what are you doing here? All the doctors acted as if you were a regular here. What's wrong, and why does everyone keep crying?" As she tried to find the words to say, I kissed her hand to help her spit it out. Then she said the thing that changed our relationship forever. " Michael. I'm dying."

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:0!Soo what'd you think? Review! Ask me questions go ahead. I have big plans for this story so stay tuned guys


	4. Emotions

I tried to hold off on writing a bit longer to make the suspense grow, but this is my first story, and I'm anxious so here's chapter 4: Emotions

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Emotions

I couldn't believe what I just heard. " . You can't be dying. Noo. It's not true. TELL ME IT'S NOT TRUE!" When I looked at her, she was in tears. I was being completely insensitive. I rushed to her side and hugged her. I needed that hug just as much as she did. "Michael. I'm so sorry." I didn't understand what was going on. I was still in complete shock at what she had just told me. "Nikita, what is going on? Is it… Cancer?" After she was able to stop crying, she replied, "No. I have a kidney problem. My first one failed, and then I waited like 3 months to get a transplant. My blood type is rare so they said if another one failed there wasn't much they could do about it." She choked back some tears and continued on. "When I was at home, before I passed out, I felt this horrible feeling in my gut, and then I collapsed." I then took her hand in mine, and squeezed as hard as I could so that she could continue on. "Now here we are. In this same hospital... Michael, you have no idea all I went through with my first kidney. It was too much. All the pain, and pills. I don't think I can go through it again. I'm not strong enough. I don't even think that even if they did the procedure again, they would have another kidney to put in me. I mean O- is really hard to find. I-I-." She bursts into tears again. I hugged her with all the passion, love, and care that was possible. I can't believe how this mission has turned out. I was just supposed to befriend the Baker's and find out who they were dealing to (Using Nikita of course). Now look what it's turned out to be. I care for Nikita. I care way too much, this much I know, but I can't help myself. And now just when my feelings start to develop, she has to have this happen to her. Bad things always happen to good people.

As I was still hugging Nikita, we were interrupted. I would've been angry about the intrusion if it hadn't been Ilse. Nikita let me go and gave me a small nod, letting me know that she needed a minute to talk to her best friend. As I walked out of the room, I heard the loudest cry I've heard. It was the both of them. I looked through the window of Nikita's Hospital room to see Ilse, and Nikita hugging each other, and crying their eyes out. I don't really know Ilse, but from what Nikita's told me, she and Ilse have been friends for years. I guess she also helped Nikita when her kidney's started to fail.

After Nikita and Ilse had there moment, Ilse told me that Nikita wanted to talk to me. I didn't actually know what to say to Nikita. All I know is that I will do everything in my power to make her happy. No matter what it is.

I walked into the room, and she patted the other side of my bed welcoming me to sit next to her. I happily complied, and wrapped my arm around her waist. I held her so tight because I felt that if I let go of her for a moment, I would lose her forever.

"Michael, I need you to know something. If you don't want to get attached to me because it'll only hurt more when I leave, that's okay. I will fully understand." I looked at her in such disbelief. Then I just pulled her even closer to me, if that was even possible, and said "Nikita, you have no idea how much I care about you. I would switch bodies with you just so you could live, and I could die. I don't want to see you suffer. I don't want to see you hurt. But worst of all, I don't wanna see you… die, so I'll be here for you til the absolute end of this." I kissed her forehead. I didn't feel the need to tell her my real identity because although she deserved the truth, I don't know how this would affect her, so I voted against it.

I'm guessing I fell asleep because I was still in the same spot as I was earlier. Cuddling Nikita in her hospital bed. Nikita was sleeping so I decided to go home and do a little research. Nikita's isn't dying without a fight. She may be okay with dying but I'm not.

When I got home I decided to call Birkhoff. With him, the research could get don't a whole lot faster. _Beep, Beep "Hello?"_

"Birkhoff it's Michael. I need you to me a favor. I need you to look up all O- blood types in London."

_"Sure thing man… Wait, why do you need to know where O- blood types are?"_

"Can you do it or not, Birkhoff?!"

_"Yeah. Just give me a second. (Jerk)." _I heard him typing. Then her finally said "_Okay Michael, there's a Natalie Walker, Gordan Michigan, Alex Henderson..." _ He named a LOT of people then what he said next caught me off guard "_Wait what is this…. Michael, did you know that YOU'RE O-?" _I am? Well that would make sense that only Birkhoff would have access to our records. I didn't realize what I said next I said out loud. "Now she doesn't need a transplant. I have O-. I can save her! I CAN SAVE HER!" Birkhoff said "_What the-"he_ was cut off by me hanging up. I rushed to my car, and drove to the hospital as fast as I could.

When I got there, I ran to Nikita's room. I busted the door open and yelled, "Nikita, NIKITA! I'M O-. I CAN GIVE YOU MY KIDNEY!" I guess I woke her up or something. I haven't been thinking clearly so I probably didn't notice her sleeping, not laying. "You're O-? Oh my gosh! And you would give your kidney to me?" She couldn't have known how much I cared about her, but I always care faster than other people. "Yes, Nikita I would do ANYTHING to make you better. I don't even need both kidneys'…. But I DO need you!" With that being said, she kissed me with all the emotions I predicted she was feeling. Passion, thankfulness, and care.

3 months later

I was walking Nikita into her house, from the Hospital. She had just had her kidney surgery 3 days ago, and it was a success. I was hurting as much as she was since they did take my kidney. We both felt pain together. It was like we were connected. I made it to her room, she tried to take off her clothes, and get into her night clothes, but of course she couldn't do it alone. I didn't want to make her uncomfortable, so I walked up to her, put my hand on the bottom of her shirt and said "May I?" she smiled a weak smile and said "Yes... Thank you." I helped her take off her shoes, pants and shirt, and grabbed an oversized t-shirt. I helped her put it on and then after her head finally went through the shirt, I pecked her lips. I helped her into bed, and when she was fully comfortable, it occurred to me. As if on cue, she answered the question that had just popped into my head. "Yes, Michael, you can sleep with me. You ARE my boyfriend." She didn't have to tell me twice. I quickly took off my shirt, and pants, and moved on the other side of her so that we were spooning. I lay my cheek on hers, kissed it, then wrapped my arms around her and pulled her closer to me. I intertwined our fingers and we feel asleep surrounded by each other.

I woke up before her, and decided to make her breakfast. Pancakes, all types of fruits, juices, and everything else that was in her fridge that was edible.

She walked in just as I was setting the table and she, even in the morning, looked amazing. I still can't believe she's mine. "Good morning Nikita. I hope you're hungry because I've cooked every single thing in you refrigerator." She giggled and said, "Good morning babe. I'm starving! OOhhh pancakes!" I love making her smile.

After we both ate as much as our stomachs would allow, we lay in her couch cuddling. "What do you wanna do now?" She said, "I don't know. We could watch a movie."

As I looked through the channel's I saw that a scary movie was on. When I suggested it to Nikita, she went ballistic! "No Michael. I hate scary movies! It's all too real!" This was surprisingly amusing. "Nikita, nothing's real about these movies. There merely for entertainment. Please, just watch it for me. I'll protect you." I said with my arms wide open, as an invitation for her to hug me. She playfully pushed me in the chest, and we both laughed. She mouthed 'fine' and I started the movie. She sat next to me with my arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer to me as she layed her head on my shoulder.

One hour into the movie, I saw a side of Nikita that I'd never seen. She was seducing me. I looked at her and realized it was a big mistake because she captured my lips. We actually ended up making out until the movie ended. When the silence consumed the room, she sped the kiss up, and made it more aggressive. I lifted her up off of the couch and into my arms. You can guess what happened next.

That next morning, I felt soo happy. I looked to my left, and there was the source of my joy, my beautiful girlfriend. I decided to go home and handle some things since I've been completely shutting Division out of my head, and I've witnessed first hand what happens when you put something else before Division; they destroy it. So I kissed Nikita good bye, let her know I would be back later that night, and headed home.

As I was walking to my house, I felt like I was being watched. I looked around and saw no one, so I just shrugged it off.

Amanda's POV:

"Amanda, target is spotted. Should I go through with the kill? I have a clean shot of her right now."

"Agent Ricky, you're only objective is to be there as my backup. We can't have this plan go wrong. Are the surveillance cameras still set up?"

"Yes. I'm looking right now. Three in Michael's place, and five in Nikita's."

"Okay then. When the time comes, I'll let you know what to do with our little Nikita."

"Yes Amanda, but may I ask, why don't we just kill Nikita if you already know that Michael is falling, or is already in love with her?"

As I looked down at all of the pictures of Nikita when she was with Carla, and when she was 3 years old, I replied, "We have some unfinished business. Good bye for now, and remember: if you get caught, this whole operation goes to hell, do you understand me?"

"Yes, ma'am"

Michael's Pov:

I was awaken at 3 a.m by the annoying sound of my phone. I looked over to make sure I didn't wake Nikita, then grabbed my phone and hopped out of the room to answer it. "Hello?"

"Dude, it's Birkhoff. Percy says he needs you at Division for 3 days to do this with some new recruit's. Your flight will be leaving at 6 so hurry up!" Before I could reply, he hung up. I looked at my phone, then in the room just to see Nikita standing in the doorway. "Babe who was that?" She said pulling me back to bed. I tried to think of some clever lie to tell her but nothing came to me. Then I remembered something Amanda told me. 'The devil's in the details', she always said. It is true though. The best lies have the most truth. "Nikita, I have to go to New Jersey.. My job just called, and they need me. My flight leaves in 3 hours." As I looked in her eyes, I saw disappointment, and sadness. I already thought about her coming along, but that could lead to so many more problems for my life, her life, and the mission could be screwed, so she had to stay here. I was about to say my goodbyes at her place before I left it, but she wanted to take me to the airport, and say goodbye to me at the gate.

She helped me pack and me kissed like a million times. On our way to the airport, we held hands the whole time.

We were parked and were almost at the gate when I realized she wasn't beside me. I looked back to see tears in her eyes. "Nikita, what's wrong?" I said in the softest voice that has ever come out of my mouth. "I don't want you to go. I know you have too, and I know you probably don't want to leave me, but I can't stand being away from you. Michael I'm falling for you, and I don't want us to not be two houses away from each other!" I ran to her and hugged her as hard as humanly possible. By this time she was actually crying, and I hated every second of it. Of course I didn't want to leave her. I'm falling for her too. I'm just going to miss every aspect of her. I wish Division didn't exist to make us miles apart, but I can't leave yet. After I was done hugging her and she was done crying, I embraced her and kissed her with so much love, she knew I didn't want to leave her just as much as she didn't want me to go. I pulled away, and wiped the tears from her eyes, and said my last goodbye.

As I borded the plane, all I could think about was the life I was leaving behind, and how I missed her already. Her smile, her scent, her warmth. I feel empty without her, and now I have to endure that for another 3.5 days of nothingness.

Percy's Pov:

When he looked at the security footage of the airport, he realized what was really going on with Nikita and Michael. "Well that just won't do. I guess after this mission, we will have to kill her."

Michael's Pov:

When I landed the first thing I did was call Nikita. She was home now and I couldn't help but worry because my work could easily follow me straight to her. When we got off the phone, I promised to call her and tell her goodnight.

I walked into Division with the worst attitude. I knew now that I felt my place was no longer here; it was with her. I walked in operations to see Birkhoff sitting there, typing away. "Hey man what's up." I wasn't in the mood for small talk so I just cut straight to the chase. "What am I doing here, and how can I make my time her shorter?" He looked at me with confusion, then made an 'oh' noise with his mouth. I gave him a glare that said 'well, say what you're thinking.' Then he said the exact thing I was hoping he wouldn't say. "Oh my gosh, Michael! You love her don't you?" I was stunned and caught off guard by his quickness. "What? No I'm not. I just want to get home as quick as I can." I realized that I had just let 'home' slip out of my mouth. Damn it! "Your home? Now it's your home? I knew this mission should've been for someone else. You always get way to involved. Macy, now this Nikita chick? Dude, she's hot and all but-" I slammed his body into the wall. He got scared and semi-yelled "Hey man, calm down!" I said, "Don't you EVER talk about her.. EVER! Are you hearing me Seymour? You know nothing about her!" He was getting even more scared. "Okay man. Jeez calm down!" I put him down and rushed away to a place without cameras. I needed to hear her voice. It always calms me down.

After I called her I was 100 times happier, and amused. She said that when she went to the store after I left, someone asked her out. I got mad until she said it was a girl. She always knows the best way to make me smile. Even if she didn't know it.

After talking with Nikita, I walked to Percy's office to see if there was anything I could do tonight to speed up the process. He said no, so I headed home. When I got there, it was like it wasn't even my house. Without her scent, or an item of hers, its not the same. She is my home.

I called Nikita and told her goodnight, and went to sleep.

The next day, I woke up early, and went straight to Division. I got there to find out what I was supposed to do. I was supposed to monitor a capable recruit. She was in the federal prison so it took me 3 hours to do that. Her name was Sarah, and she will definitely make a great agent. Next I had to help this new recruit with his coping skills. He wasn't doing well, and he was a little crazy. His name was Owen. I would've thought he would be cancelled by now, but Percy saw 'potential' in him so I had to help him. I helped him for 5 hours. Then Percy wanted me to attend this meeting thing with him as his bodyguard, and that took that rest of the day. By the time I got home it was 11 p.m and I was exhausted!

I called Nikita and apologized for not calling sooner. She wasn't mad though. She said she expected me to be this busy so she didn't get her hopes up. She told me about her day I told her about mine, we laughed, we told each other how much we missed each other, and we said goodnight.

I woke up sweating, and breathing hard. It was about Percy finding out how much I cared for Nikita and killing her, and it was all my fault. I called Nikita and asked if we could video chat for a while. She complied as I got my laptop.

"Nikita, hi!" I said with the nicest voice I could. "Hey baby. What's up, and why are you up this early?" I just wanted to hug her so badly right now. "I had a bad dream. I can't sleep now, and I miss you like crazy!" She touched her chest in a playful way and said" Aww! Babe I miss you too! I can't wait til you come back tomorrow!" I smiled at her always being so uplifting. We talked for another hour before I let her go to sleep. "Goodnight  
Nikki." She smiled at her nickname. "Goodnight Mikey."

The next day was filled with Amanda's therapy. She wanted to know 'how I was dealing with my mission.' She kept asking dumb questions that she knew the answers too. She finally asked a question that caught my attention. "So how's it going with Nikita. I mean she is a very pretty women so it would make sense for you to be taken aback by her beauty, and personality."  
"Amanda, she is merely just a mission. She means nothing to me. When this mission is over, she will go on living her life, and I will live mine." At that last statement, I started to worry. What would we do after this mission? I can't bring her here. She loves London, and Ilse, and my building doesn't allow animals, so Kota wouldn't be able to come. There's too many obsticles. I can't leave her though. I won't leave her.

After my session with Amanda, I went home to board my flight back home. I got my stuff together and drove to the airport. I called Nikita and told her when I would land, then I hung up so I could get on the plane.

When I landed, and got to the gate, the first thing I saw was her. I ran towards her, dropped my bags, flung my arms around her, and spun her around. I did that for a full minute, and then put her down and I kissed her with soo much desperation, it caught us both off guard. Our mouths moved together in sync. She stuck her tongue in my mouth and I complied. I pulled away when I thought my face would turn blue from the lack of breathe. We stood there with our foreheads together, then she said, "Don't ever leave me again!" Then I said what I've been wanting to say for a while. "Nikita, I love you! I love you so much!" She smiled so big and replied, "I love you too Michael!" Then I picked her up again and held her in my arms.

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I tried to make this chapter more about their relationship.

SPOILER ALERT: Next few chapters will be wrapping up the mission, and dealing with the kill order on Nikita, and an old character reappearance!


	5. Dread

Hilo! Soo, I've been doing some digging and I finally know exactly where this story is going! Be warned, you probably won't guess what will happen. Enjoy!

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Dread.

I dreaded the day it would all begin. I knew this was what I came here for but, what I got out of this mission was way better. I got Nikita. Now what? I have to lie to her face, pretend that I don't already know everything about her, act like us meeting was a coincidence. I love her, and she is my life, but after this mission... I just don't want to hurt her. I want to be with her, and the more I think about this mission, the more I know that we, can NEVER truly be together, and it hurts. Like a million nails being shot through my body.

While I was in bed with Nikita Percy had called me and let me know that this was the estimated time that I should be meeting the Baker's, so I had to figure out a way to make Nikita introduce us. After the call, she had a worried look on her face. "Michael, do you have to go back again?" She had tears in her eyes since only 3 days ago, I had come back. I went back on the bed, and pulled her tight up against my chest and said. "No baby, I don't plan on leaving you any time soon! I love you okay?" She looked into my eyes and said, "I love you too!" Then we got back in bed, and we cuddled, til the sun was up, and she looked golden.

When we woke up, I asked her, "Hey. Do you have any other friends that I haven't met yet?" She took a pause to think for a second and said, "Well there's Ryan, he's a CIA guy, and there's Alice and Ronnie, then there's Makayla, but that's it." I thanked God she mentioned my targets. "Oh. Are Alice and Ronnie another couple?"

"Yeah, why?"

I was thinking 'well there my targets and I'm going to kill them' but instead I settled on, "Well maybe we could double date sometime. I mean you are my girlfriend. I'd love to meet your new friends."

"Are you serious!? I've never been on a double date! This is going to be soo much fun!" She was smiling so wide it made me grin. I really do hate lying to- STOP! I need to focus. If I keep feeling guilty, I could destroy the mission, and get us both killed, but I think even a dog could figure out which one I'm more worried about.

It was a Friday night and I had just finished getting ready for my double date with the Baker's. I was wearing a suit that always made me look more muscular than I really am, but that didn't matter because when I saw Nikita, it's like EVERYTHING around her disappeared. She looked absolutely stunning. She wore a light grey dress that hit in the middle of her thigh, and matching heels. She wore her hair up in the same ponytail she wore the first day I'd met her, and she wore light makeup, with dark makeup on her eyes to make them _pop!_ "OH MY GOD! Nikita you look... I mean... You look amazing! I can't even begin to express how sexy... I mean beautiful you are!" She was giggling at my loss for words. "Awe, Thank you Honey. You look handsome too." I walked up to her and we embraced before I broke the silence. "Baby, I love you soo much!" She smiled that same smile every time I told her that. "I love you too!" Then I wrapped my arm around her waist, and led her to the car.

We were at this very expensive, very elegant restaurant, and I'm guessing Nikita felt as out of place as I was, since we didn't pick the restaurant, and we both usually stay in middle class restaurants. Anyways, when we walked in, I eyed my targets for the first time. Nikita walked up to them and gave Alice a hug, then Ronnie. "I haven't seen you guys in so long. I was beginning to think you made new friends." With that they all started laughing, and we all walked to our table. "Alice, Ronnie, I'd like you to meet my boyfriend, Michael." She introduced me with such proud ness. If only she knew the real man she fell for. Then she would only be disappointed. "Hello Michael. We've heard such good things. I hope you're treating Nikita with all the care in the world." Ronnie said. I just shook his hand and smiled. Then I took Nikita's hand, and talked to Ronnie but kept my gaze on Nikita. "Oh I am. Trust me." Then she winked and I pulled her chair out for her and sat down next to her. When we ordered, we shared a menu and kept being frisky with each other. I was paying so much attention on Nikita, I'd forgotten to observe my targets, but when I looked up they were more observing me and Nikita. Probably because neither one of us could stop smiling at each other. I finally focused on my targets and asked them a few questions. "So, how did you guys meet Nikita?"

"Oh, well we were looking for a house in this area, and we saw her and Ilse planting flowers in the park, so we asked them about the neighborhood. From there, we've all been a threesome. Now we're a foursome."

With that, they both gave me huge cheeky smiles, and Nikita winked at me, took my hand in her, and intertwined our fingers. God I love her.

"Where did you two meet?" Alice asked us. I looked at Nikita and she seemed anxious to tell them so I let her. "Well, we met at yoga. He was new, and he was staring at me, so I introduced myself to him. He was so cute. We went out for coffee, and then he walked me home, and asked me out. From there, we fell in love." After telling our story, she rubbed our noses together and smiled. "Awe! That's so cute! We met in Russia. We were both at a gala for this painting we wanted and he bought the one I wanted so I negotiated, and he was stupid enough to give me the painting for a date!" Ronnie jumped in and said. "Best deal I've ever made." Then they just looked at each other awkwardly and turned to us. They were so normal up until now. Well now that I know they don't care for each other, it will be even easier to complete my mission.

When our food arrived, Nikita finally let go of my hand, and fed me a shrimp, then she started to act frisky again. She is just so adorable when she acts like this. I looked at the Baker's and they kept staring at us with envy. I don't know what's up with them but it can't be good. They keep being so emotional. I'm definitely not ready to finish this mission. I'm missing some detail and it's essential that I figure out what it is.

After dinner, we were about to say goodbye when they invited us to this party thing tomorrow night. We happily complied and made our way to the car. The car ride was filled with conversations about dinner.

"I think they liked you! This is so good. Now we have a couple we can hang out with, and we get to go to a party!" She was so happy and it made me happy.

"I hope they liked me. I told you babe, no one can resist my charms!" She giggled and playfully punched me in the arm.

When we got to my place, we busted through the door kissing. It was heated, and passionate. I lifted her up and made my way to the bed. When we got there, we made love, and fell asleep in each other's arms.

At 4 a.m. I woke up to find Nikita wiggling, and screaming. She was having a nightmare. I tried to wake her up, but she wouldn't wake, so I did the next best thing, and just held her in my arms as tight as I could. She kept yelling stuff that I couldn't understand, and then she woke up. When she looked up and saw me she broke down. She kept crying, til she was almost choking. I took her face in my hand, made her look at me, and said, "Nikita, Honey, calm down okay? I'm here. I'm here." I kept whispering loving things to her, and she finally stopped gasping, and told me what her dream was about. "Michael it was HORRIBLE! I was walking my dog, and across the street was you and some guy, and he pulled a gun out and shot you. Right before my eyes!" She kept tugging at my shirt to pull me closer to her. I think she wanted to feel that I was still alive. "Nikita. Listen to me! I'm still here. I will never leave you. Not if I have anything to do with it. I love you okay? More than life itself! More than I love myself! YOU are the air I breathe and I will always protect you, and myself. No matter what." With that, she hugged me as tight as she possibly could.

The night of the party, I was in my party clothes, and so was she. That's when the doorbell rang. Nikita went for the door and gasped so loud that the neighbors probably heard it. I walked to the door and there she was. My new girlfriend being held at gunpoint by my 'old girlfriend.'

"Macy! What the hell!"

"Michael! You didn't actually believe that I would let you go now did you?"

Nikita looked so confused, and scared. I was about to run in front of the gun when Macy cut me off. "Don't even think about it! If you even take one step close to her, I will shoot her and you will have to watch her die." Nikita had tears in her eyes and I just wanted to hold her but Macy made it very clear that I would do no such thing. Why was she here? I mean I know why, I just don't know why she waited so long to take revenge for her dead husband. I mean that was so many years ago. "You won't touch her. If you don, I won't even think twice about following her to death, and we both know you want some kind of revenge, so let's settle this. Just the two of us." She looked like she was thinking, so I took that time to mouth to Nikita an 'I love you' but she didn't say it back. I'm guessing she's a little mad that I didn't tell her about Macy. "Alright Michael. I don't want to kill you. I want information. Like why-"I cut her off knowing what she was about to say. "Macy, if you don't mind I'd like to settle this without a gun to her head, and I want her out of here. No in fact she stays, we leave. If you don't agree to my terms, things could get a little messy." Macy agreed to my terms, and I'm guessing she wasn't exactly trained for this kind of stuff, so she also let me talk to Nikita alone. Nikita was so confused and shocked by the venom in my voice when I was trying to appear threatening. I took her hands in mine and kissed her with all the love in my body. She was so scared, I could feel her trembling. When I broke away I hugged her, and said, "I'm so sorry she's here, but I was serious. You have to stay here, and I have to go." She tensed up and pulled me away from her. She was already crying. "No Michael. This is turning out just like my dream! I can't lose you, no I won't lose you. I love you soo much, and if you don't come back, I just can't take it! Michael please. Just let me come with you!" I hated seeing her this sad over me. What surprised me was that she didn't even ask about who Macy was, or what I did. She just trusted me whole heartedly. "Hey! Look at me. I am coming back. I won't leave you! I need you to stay her though. I can't have you getting hurt! I won't allow it. She has problems with me, not you, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I knew you were hurt because of me. I love you! And I will return." With that I kissed her again. It was supposed to be a peck, but she wouldn't let me go. It was long and loving and desperate. She still had tears streaming down her face, and when I pulled away I wiped them. Then I hugged her one last time, and was on my way.

When we got to this abandoned warehouse, I did something that I didn't think I was capable of doing. Macy had a gun pointed at the back of my head. She coughed once, and that's all it took for me to make my move. I whipped the gun out of her hand, and kicked her in the face. She reacted slow enough that he was able to grab the gun. He pulled it up to her face then said. "Look! I didn't want to kill your husband! I had to or the people I worked for would kill me. I was supposed to kill you, but I spared your life. Now you come here and threaten Nikita? Big mistake! She's the only reason I'm not shooting you right now, so pack your bags, and go to a different country. I want you out of America by Sunday or I will track you down, and I will kill you! Do you understand?!" She looked up at me and said, "Just answer me this one question. If they forced you to kill people, and you don't like it, why are you still with them?" I was taken aback by her question. She asked exactly what I've been trying to avoid. The truth. Elizabeth and Haley. It's been a very long time since I've thought about them. I can't even remember the last time I thought about their smiles, and laughs, and all the times we had together. Since I've met Nikita I've been a hundred times happier. Even though she's healed me, they were still here and I must avenge their deaths, and now I know what will happen once this mission is over. I have to leave her. It pains me to think about it but revenge has been my whole life for 3 years, and I'm not completely ready to let that life go. At least not without finishing my quest. I finally stopped over thinking and said, "Just go… NOW!" With that she left.

When I got home to Nikita, Alice and Ronnie were there comforting Nikita because she was still crying. When she saw me, she ran to me, and wrapped herself around my body and held me in a death grip. "Michael, oh my God! Never do anything like that again! I was so worried!" I held her tight, and kissed her hair. "I'm so sorry Nikita." We just held each other until Alice's voice interrupted things. "Are you guys going to be okay?" I let Nikita out of my grasp, but not completely. I continued to hold her waist. Nikita said, "No, we'll be fine now. I guess we'll have to take a rain check." Alice looked puzzled then said, "Oh Nikita. You are always thinking of others, huh? It couldn't matter less right now. It's just good that you're both okay. Now good night." She smiled, and walked out the door. The second the door closed, I knew it was time for an explanation, but that wasn't on Nikita's mind. She turned to me and said, "I know you probably don't want to tell me, but that's okay," She smiled and continued on. "You can tell me when you're ready." She pecked my lips, and I then knew that no one in this world could be more perfect then her. With that being said, I actually wanted to tell her. "She was my ex-girlfriend. We broke up because she was clingy, and honestly crazy. I never loved her, but she did love me, and it felt mean to continue dating someone I didn't honestly love. Now she was mad because she thought I cheated on her but I didn't, and now here we are." She was making a wow face, and continued staring at me. "Some crazy ex." We both laughed, then I said, "The next girlfriend I had, well I loved her to death! She's sexy, and selfless, and loving, and, she completes me. She's everything I'm not, and I will never, ever, stop loving her!" Nikita was now shedding happy tears, because she knew I was talking about her all along. "I love you, so much more then I love myself, and I need you to remember that. I will always love you, no matter what." She looked a little confused, since I kept making it sound like I was leaving her, so I kissed her so reassure her, but I needed her to know that for the future when I do leave her.

The next morning, I cuddled with Nikita for hours, then I wanted to buy her something special, so I snuck away while she was sleep, and bought her a necklace with her, and mine birthstone put together. I headed home, and when I got there, I almost exploded in agony. There was Nikita's house. Door wide open, all of her belongings thrown all over the place, and a drop of her blood on the floor next to her bed. My heart was pounding so hard! I can't take this again. I have to find her.. NOW! "I will find you Nikita. I promise!" I kissed our stones as a reminder of her, and ran out the door to start my search.

Agent Ricky's POV:

"Agent Ricky, have you and the alpha team spotted Nikita?"

"Yes ma'am. She is up, and walking to her kitchen. Should we proceed with the kill?"

"Yes. Go Ahead."

As we approached the house, Nikita was now in her bedroom. We only sent in two people, and then, within seconds, everything went to Hell. As me and a graduating recruit moved in on her, she actually killed him! When he approached her, she got scared and kicked him in the face. His gun flew to the ground, and she grabbed it, and pulled the trigger. She got scared after that, and panicked. She tried to fight me but she only ended getting a pretty good punch to the face in. As she tried to attack me, I got her in a choke hold. I was just about to shoot Nikita when I heard an all too annoying voice in my ear. "Agent, give me a status report.. What just happened?" I looked down at Nikita, then replied, "She killed one of our best recruits! I'm just finishing the job." I was again about to pull the trigger when she yelled, "NOOO! We could actually use her. 'She obviously has potential, and can give Michael more motivation, and-'" She stopped mumbling to herself when she realized I was still listening. Then she said, "We're bring her in to be recruited. She will not die today, and none of you will tell Michael of this, are we clear?" Then I sighed, of course I had to obey her, but damn she was crazy. "Yeah, okay ma'am we're bringing her in, and Michael will hear nothing of this." At the word 'Michael' Nikita squirmed in my arms extra hard, so I knocked her out with the gun and carried her to the van.

Amanda's POV:

I stared at her for hours, just thinking about all the fun I would have with her. She was my new guinea pig and boy was I about to toy with her emotions. She started to wake up, and freaked out at her new surroundings. "Where the hell am I? Where's Michael!?" She was getting so worked up. "Nikita, calm down. Michael is perfectly fine. We were merely going to kill you because you were to big of a distraction for Michael, and then you killed one of our own, so now, you are going to become one of our own." She was crying now, at the thought of killing someone. She was extremely sensitive, but I can fix that in due time. "Where am I?!" She finally said after she caught her breath. "Nikita, welcome to Division."

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Now she's Division.. What will happen next? Hmm I wonder! XD Review and let me know what you thought of it!


	6. Without You

So I've just started trying to make my writing more organized, so I hope I did well. This chapter almost didn't get written because of a little troll named Aurolee, soo… Enjoy! XD

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Without You

I looked all over London. Every corner, every place, I just couldn't find her. Percy told me to complete the mission, but to Hell with the mission! She's gone! I promised her to protect her, and I didn't deliver. To top that off, I haven't a clue where she is. If I don't find her soon, I might not be able to even go back to Division.

When I finally gave up hope on London, I decided to rent a hotel room because I couldn't bare going home and not seeing her, not smelling her, not feeling her… Not loving her.

In my hotel room, I still couldn't sleep. Lying in bed didn't feel right without feeling her body next to mine. I missed hearing her voice at night saying 'I love you' in her beautiful voice. I missed how her feet always felt cold in bed no matter how warm it was. I missed her holding my hand at night, and never letting go. I missed looking into those beautiful brown eyes and feeling like my true self again. But more than anything, I missed….her.

That night was filled with no sleep. I couldn't sleep. Just thinking about what could be happening to her right now while I was sleeping kept me up.

I was at the airport. I just thought, if anybody could find Nikita it'd be Birkhoff. He could find anyone.

As I was on the plane, I thought I heard her voice, or her laugh. My heart would race, and I'd look to see who it was only to find that no one was even smiling. I was slowly going crazy without her.

Nikita's POV:

I woke up again after that Amanda chick told me I was in 'Division.' I'm supposed to go to Amanda's office and talk. I don't like her at all, and I don't want to talk to her. I miss Michael. I keep dreaming about him, and even if they didn't hurt him, I need to see him. With my own eyes.

I walked into Amanda's office, and took a seat where she offered one.

"Hello Nikita."

"Why am I here?"

She looked puzzled, so I decided to be nicer.

"Please. I just want to know what it is, that I am doing here.."

"Okay Nikita. I just want to ask you a few questions, then I can answer yours."

I agreed to her terms, and she started throwing questions at me.

"So Nikita, how did it feel to kill Conner? Did you enjoy seeing his blood splash against the wall? Did you like watching the life dissipate away from his body?"

She was going to deep. I was now shedding silent tears. "STOP!"

Amanda knew she was on rough ground, so she changed the subject. "I didn't have many questions since I already know everything about you, so my last question is, who WAS Carla Bennett?"

That also struck a nerve. Why was she doing this? She knew everything about me? How? What is this place, and why is Michael associated with it?

I finally spoke. "She.. She's nobody. Just another someone who pretended to care then banished the second things got tough." I said that a million times in my head and every time I said it, in my head I screamed '_Liar! Liar! Liar!' _She didn't abandon me. I made her leave.

"Thank you Nikita. That will be all for today." She rushed out of the room, and I sat there for another 3 minutes I'm guessing. Then I headed back to my room.

That night I couldn't sleep. Thinking about what I'd said made me think over my life. I had a terrible childhood, and got into drugs. When I finally found Carla, I thought maybe life is worth living after all. Then came the day when I got clean, and a cop showed up, things got crazy, and I ended up in London being depressed more than ever. I tried to be happy, then I met Michael and it made happiness a lot more believable. Now I killed someone. It's no one's fault but mine. I killed someone. Conner could've been someone's brother or father, and I took that away. I ended someone's life. How can you come back from that? How can you live with yourself knowing you ended someone else's existence? You can't. I was already crying, and couldn't stop. Before I knew it, I had pills in my hand, and a cup filled with water. Before I took the pills I muttered, "I'm so sorry." As I was about to take the pills to end my life, the one who held my heart, who I've been longing for walked in.

I immediately dropped the pills, and water, and ran towards him and hugged him as hard as I could. "Michael…"

Michael's POV:

Birkhoff and I were looking for leads on Nikita's location, then I heard an agent talking to his team, and he mentioned his name. That's when I figured everything out. Then I made Birkhoff find her room. He did it in less than 20 seconds, and after he told me her location, I sprinted to her room. When I got there, I opened the door and there she was. Pills and water in her hands. Since I already knew they never gave new recruits meds, I pieced together what she was doing with them. I was about to run up to her, then I realized she had the same thought, and did it before I could. She was now hugging me as hard as she possibly could. She whispered my name with such desperation. I held her even tighter not only because I missed her, but also because she had almost ended her life. "Nikita, baby I missed you so much!" As I let go of her to see her beautiful face, all I could see was tears. "Baby, what happened? I went away for only an hour to find you… gone. Are you hurt?" I examined her body, then she began to explain. "It all happened so fast. I-Michael I- I killed someone." She had so much fear in her eyes, so I pulled her into another long hug. She needed me right now, and even though I keep letting her down, this time I'll try to make it up to her. "Okay, we can talk about this all later. For right now, I need to get you out of here." As I guided her out the door, someone was waiting for me.

"Amanda!"

"Nice of you to join us Michael."

"I'm taking her out of here, now move out my way before I have to make you!"

"Oh but Michael, if you kill me, I will have to disable Nikita's little kill chip!"

I went wide eyed instantly. My whole world was just flipped upside down by her saying that. I would do whatever she needed me to do if it meant Nikita could live. "What do you want Amanda!?"

"Michael, you have no idea what kind of future I have planned for the three of us…. Now we are going to be playing a game. I get to have you both here as each others motivation, now here are the rules: first, you don't tell Percy any of this, second: you too get to maintain a romantic relationship behind closed doors but you need to be careful, and third: you have to do anything I say. If any of the rules are broken, I kill you both.. Is that clear?"

"Yes." She smiled and exited the room. I turned to Nikita who was trying to breathe. She couldn't believe her ears, and she was going into shock. "Nikita.. NIKITA!" I shook her until she began to look at me. She broke down, and cried for two whole hours. When she finally stopped she said, "Michael, I can't do this. This is too much. I killed someone, now I'm dead, and now this?! Michael, this, this is too much. I can't deal with this!" She was gazing at the pills again, and I took her face in my hands and said, "Hey! You're going to get through this! We're going to get through this. Look at me," I gave her a forced smile, since I was also terrified out of my mind. "I need you to be strong. You can't leave me. You're not allowed too. Don't you know that if you died, I wouldn't be too far behind? I love you Nikita. With my whole being so don't, DON'T EVER go down that road. Please." By this time we were both in tears. She finally replied, "Okay."

I swept her in my arms, and lay her in bed. She grabbed my arm, and held on for dear life. "I need you tonight. Please, just hold me baby." I ran to her side and lay next to her. I knew tomorrow would be her first day of training, and the beginning of the end of her life, but for now, I just wanted to enjoy being in her presence again.


	7. Change

Hello guys. So this chapter is titled Change, because as you saw in the last chapter, everything had just begun but now everything is changing. By the way, this will be told a lot more in Nikita's perspective rather than Michael's.

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Change

Division from my perspective will never be the same. She's here now, and that means everyday will be a struggle. She's sensitive, and I don't know how she will handle her life changing in a day, all because of me. I wouldn't be surprised if she blamed me for everything. It was my fault she's here in the first place.

Nikita's POV:

My first day felt like a dream. All I could focus on was the past. My home, my dog, my friends, and now Michael. He comes into my life and mixes everything up, and now I'm here. I don't understand why. I miss my morning walks with Kota, my girl time with Ilse or Alice, I miss just being able to walk down the street and just relax, I miss all the time I got to spend with Michael, and I miss, myself. Somehow along this journey, this world has swallowed me up easier than a crumb. I need to find myself again before I'm molded into something I'm not.

Training was agony! I'm in shape, don't get me wrong, but these people are doing more than what's necessary for the Olympics! They don't even get a normal break. I was starting to feel nauseous when I saw a familiar face… Michael. I haven't seen him since this morning. I've always been a natural actor so acting like I didn't love the guy wasn't that hard. I was watching two guys spar, and one of them finally won. I was still new to this stuff so the instructors put me with a guy named Noel. He had been here for a while, and was near graduation, he just couldn't fight to save his life, is all. As we were sparring, he of course knocked me down, and offered me a hand. I graciously took it, and when our hands met, he immediately turned red. That sometimes happened with guys, but who knew in the place full of crazy people, guys would still blush when touching me. He let me go, and graciously bowed his head.

I looked over only to see Michael giving Noel a very hateful glare. It just made me silently giggle that a man as amazing as Michael could be jealous of a guy I'd just met.

I walked over to Michael, and asked him to help me with sparring. I honestly don't know anything about it, and I'm tired of people one upping me, so I needed all the help I could get.

"Sir."

"Nikita, what is it."

His tone threw me off guard. He was better at acting as if he didn't love me then anyone I'd ever seen. "Uh, yeah can you help me with sparring? Those other trainers are definitely not as skilled as you, and to be the best, you must be trained by the best right?"

For the first time since we stepped in Division, he smiled, and I saw a peak of his soul. "Yeah, of course I can help you. Just don't waste my time." I gave him a mocking glare and he began training me. He taught me combos, and how to predict my opponent's next moves.

By the end of the day, I didn't beat Michael, but I beat a recruit that had been here longer than me, named Whisper. She was skilled, but as of today, I was better.

I had a wonderful day, and instead of going to eat non vegetarian food, I decided to find Michael. He was in his office, of course and seemed to be waiting for me. I smiled at him and made my way to his desk. I sat on his lap, and kissed releasing the tension of today's activities. After we kissed he mumbled, "Mmm I missed you."

"I missed you too, although the heated sparring wasn't the worst time." I smirked and he released a smile to me. I had a million questions but the first one that came to mind was, "So can I call you Michael, or do I have to call you sir?" Before he got a chance to answer, I captured his lips again. "Either way is good." Then I kissed him again, but I had already toyed with his testosterone level, so we started making out. Before he could remove my jacket, Amanda walked in to ruin the moment. I jumped away from Michael so fast that if Amanda didn't watch me walk into Michael's office, she wouldn't have known what just happened.

"Am I interrupting something?" She said with a cocky smirk on her face. "Nope. Just talkin'. What do you want?" She quickly reassessed herself and began to talk. "Well Percy thinks you came from the past you did come from, and he knows nothing about you two, but since I just walked in on a make out session, I'd say you two aren't being careful enough." She looked at us like she was the parent, scolding the children. I looked over at Michael, and he had an amused glint in his eyes that let me know, he found it a bit amusing too. "I know you think it's all fun and games, but when you two get caught, and she gets killed," she pointed her skinny little finger at me, "it won't be funny anymore." She exited the room, and as soon as the door closed, I felt tension radiating from Michael. He stood up and walked towards me, and kissed me yet again. I thought we were going to continue where we left off, but he had other ideas. He pulled away and began to talk. "Nikita, she's right. I've been carless and stupid, but if Percy finds out, and he killed you," he looked away to prevent the tears from escaping his eyes. His love for me has never been shown this strong. "Nikita I can't allow that. I can't imagine how I could go through that again." Again? What does he mean again? I decided not to ask because I know when he's ready, he'll tell me everything. I grabbed his hand, and intertwined our fingers and said, "Michael, we will be together forever, and you will not lose me. Even if I do end up dying I will always be right here," I pointed to his heart. "For as long as you allow me to stay, I will be there." He kissed me, and I decided to hit the showers, and maybe grab an apple. Before I let go of his hand, he embraced me and said "My love for you shoots past the moon, you know that." I giggled, and pecked his lips and said, "I love you past the universe, and back." He let go of my hand, and slapped my butt before I walked out of his office. It caught me off guard, and I laughed like a school girl with a new boyfriend.

I made it to my room to find a very weird sight. There sat Noel, leaning against my door, waiting for me. When he spotted me, he became nervous instantly. "Nikita, uh, hi"

"Hi Noel. Soo whatcha doin?" He let out a laugh, and started talking normal-ish again.

"Uh, I just came by to apologize for hurting you. It's just that Michael doesn't like me very much, and if I let you beat me, well who knows what he would've told the boss, and I could've been cancelled, or been demoted to easier training, or," he rambled on for quite a while, and I was about to say something when I heard him speak something actually audible to my ears. "Sorry I'm rambling. I'm just not used to talking to such a pretty- I mean uh. You know what, I've said my piece. Goodnight Nikita." I was smiling so wide, it probably looked retarded but I couldn't help but be humored by this. "Goodnight Noel." I could tell he was waiting to hear my door close before walking away. No wonder Michael didn't like him. He liked me. I'll talk to Michael tomorrow, because Noel could turn out to be my friend.

I woke up the next morning feeling happy so I slipped on my sports bra, and jacket, then my sweatpants and shoes, and headed out the door. Today, Michael got promoted to full-time recruit trainer, so he taught the lesson today. We were learning how to load and reload guns. He spent a little extra time on me though, and I enjoyed every second of it. "Sir" I raised my hand to get his attention.

"Please, call me Michael"

"Okay… Michael, how do you aim these things?" He stood behind me, and directed my gun, I paid no attention to the gun since his body was pressed against every inch of my back half, and his breath was caressing my neck. Damn you ponytail! "Redo it Nikita"

He was talking to me? I answered, "What?" He repeated himself, "I said redo the basics." I made an 'oh' with my mouth and did what he said in less than 20 seconds. Everybody around me looked impressed, and Noel even walked up and high-fived me but Michael made him sit back down. He's so jealous.

After the lesson, I finally ate lunch and I ate with Noel. He ended up being really nice, and although I already knew he had a crush on me, I needed a friend in this hell hole.

Michael finally introduced me to this Birkhoff, and he did the same thing Noel did. I walked into the room just to see how hacking goes, since I'm terrible at it, and when he spotted me, his eyes widened, and his mouth opened a little wider. I thought it'd be funny to tease him so I greeted, "Is this how nerds greet everyone, Michael?" He laughed and when Birkhoff finally had the will to answer he said, "Hi, sorry, I was just uh, you know, never mind. Who are you?" His voice cracked at that last sentence then I replied, "Nikita." He smiled at me before going back to his computer, typing like his life depended on it. Since no one was paying attention to us anymore, Michael squeezed my sides, and I jumped at the feeling of being tickled. I pushed him and whispered, "Michael! Stop, not in front of everyone!" He just smiled and looked around before pecking my lips, and then he escorted me to my room. I pulled him in the room, shut the door quickly, and started kissing him. I started removing clothing, as did he, and we made love for the first time in week.

I was panting, hard. "Michael... that… was..." He finished my sentence for me, "Amazing… I know." I started to snuggle up to his chest. He looked down at me and gave me this surprised look. "You're getting stronger… I can feel it." I let out an uncontrollable chuckle. "Is that a good thing?" I asked. He smiled, and rested his head against my hair and replied, "Most definitely!" He held me soo tight. I could barely move, but I enjoyed having him this close, and naked again. "I love you Michael."

"I love you too Nikita."

The next day, I had to pretend I wasn't on cloud 9. I tried to hide my smile, but before I did, Noel noticed. "Hey Nikita." He patted the mat next to him inviting me to sit down next to him. I of course accepted, and he began to speak again. "What's got you so happy? Was it the sight of seeing your best friend, Noel?" I giggled, and playfully pushed his arm and replied, "Yeah Noel! I missed you so much." He pushed me in return, and we both giggled. The trainers started talking, so everyone just shut up and listened.

"Today, you will be going to a private training area to practice snipers. Get ready and be back here 30." We all scattered and grabbed our things.

When I got on the bus I sat down, and that's when both Noel and Michael showed up simultaneously. "Nikita-"He was cut off by Michael. "Is this seat taken?" I looked at both men, back and forth, and then Noel finally said, "Uh I'll sit with Aimee." Then he walked off, and Michael sat down next to me. Since the bus was dark, and tinted windows, Michael slid his hand very slowly next to mine. I looked at him from the corner of my eyes. He continued, and put his hand on the other side of mine, and intertwined our fingers. He probably just wanted to hold my hand, but he had no idea how much it meant to me for him to be open with me in front of these spy's. I was about to actually lean my head against his shoulder when I heard gunshots. The bus stopped, and these men that talked like the man I interrogated this morning came into the bus shooting everywhere.

They were yelling French, so I didn't understand but when they roughly grabbed my arm, I looked back at Michael to see this unexplainable rage. He stood up, and then everything went black.

I woke up in a place I didn't recognize. It all started coming back to me. The van, the ambush... MICHAEL! Oh my god! I started trying to break free of these restraints, but they wouldn't budge. "Where is Jacques?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." He pulled out a remote, and shocked me. I screamed at the top of my lunges. "Now, you will tell us where our brother is, or we can spend all day doing this."

"I have no idea WHO JACQUES IS!" I wasn't giving these guys any information. I'm not stupid enough to give in. They shocked me again, and I screamed. We did this for a while, and then they did something I didn't expect them to do. "Well if you won't tell us where he is, maybe this will motivate you." I started to work on my restraints again, and they were really loose now. But before I got the chance to finish taking them off, I froze in fear, and in surprise. There was my Michael, standing there, unharmed, but captured. He looked at me, and muttered 'I love you' and they shot him. My heart stopped. I'm alone in this world now. No one to spend my nights, my heart, and my soul with. Just an empty hole in my heart that will never be filled. I started to breathe faster, adrenaline pumping through my veins. I broke my restraints, and he came up to me and said, "Are you ready to talk now." Then I replied, "Nope." And I head butted him, and stood up, grabbed his gun from the table, and shot him 6 times, along with the 2 men that brought Michael in here. I ran to him and yelled, "Michael, MICHAEL! Don't do this to me please! Michael! MICHAEL!" I couldn't cope... I couldn't breathe. I kept shaking him but it was no use. He was gone. I started waling again, and then I heard more guards coming so I kissed his hand, and his head, and escaped through this vent shaft. I jumped down from the vent, entering the outdoors, and started running as fast as I could.

I'd been running harder than I ever had. I reached a nearby gas station, and began to rest. Immediately Michael came into my mind and I started crying again. I loved him soo much, how could he be gone? How could he not be on this earth any longer? I can't comprehend how this happened. It doesn't make any sense. Before I could think any further, I heard the voice of an angel. "Nikita... Nikita" I couldn't believe it. Is this just a figment of my imagination, or is this real... "Michael?" Before he could answer, I was already running towards him. "Michael!" I jumped him, and he almost fell but he hugged me just as hard. "I'm here baby. I'm here." I started to cry again. "How are you...? I mean I saw you... I saw him… shoot you. You were dead, how are you here?" He let me go to look at me, and in his eyes, I saw guilt. "Nikita, it was all a test to see how you would do under interrogation." I went wide-eyed. I killed people. I killed people again. "No that can't be true. You would've told me…. No you're lying…" That's when it all clicked. Everything made sense. I pushed him as hard as I could, but he didn't fall because he was expecting me to react like this. "Michael, how could you not tell me? How could you do this to someone you're supposed to love?! I killed 3 people, Michael. Three people are dead, because of a test?" He looked extremely guilty. I started to get furious. I'm sure my face turned red, and he decided to talk. "Nikita, every recruit has to go through this. We needed to know that you wouldn't rat us out the second they began harming you. I'm sorry I didn't tell you but it's a part of my job! Now we have to get back to Division." He picked me up, against my will and threw me in the car. Why the hell was he acting like this? It's his job? I know I'm more to him than just a job. How could he even say that?

When we got to Division, he didn't even open my door for me. I was starting to get pissed off. We went straight to the training room and I saw Percy for the third time. "Michael, I thought we discussed you handling her." Handling me? What the- Oh my goodness! They're trying to kill me! Michael replied, "I thought it'd be easier in the walls of Division." Two guards grabbed me and I began to scream, then Percy stopped them. "That won't be necessary." The he directed his attention to Michael and said, "You know, this mission wasn't only testing Nikita." Michael's face was blank of any emotions, and he said, "Did I pass?"

"For the most part, yes." Then the guards let me go fully, and I said, "Your both sick!" And I stormed off to my room. I took a warm shower, but it didn't calm me down one bit. I was still extremely pissed. Michael walked in just as I got out of the shower, and I threw my towel at him, since it was the first thing I could get my hands on. "Nikita, please let me explain." I didn't want to hear it at all, but he had already closed the door, and was in my room, so what could I do. "Sometimes Percy tests people, and sometimes you don't know when you're being tested."

"So what you're trying to tell me is you knew you were being tested?" I gave him a look that said I didn't believe him one bit. "Nikita, you know me. I would never, EVER, let anyone hurt you, especially if I was the one who had to initiate the killing. I love you and…"

"Michael, I really want to believe you, but what you did to me..."

"Nikita, I am soo sorry. I know you must've been sad when you thought I was dead, but please, believe that I love you and would NEVER let anything happen to you." He walked towards me and tried to hug me. I tensed up, and let him hold me. "Michael, just... I don't care how little; please just give me a heads up." I finally began to hug him back, and I felt him nod, and smile. I pulled away and gave him a long kiss that wasn't passionate at all. It just let him know that I forgave him.

2 months later:

Noel and I were hanging out, just the two of us, in my room. He began tickling me, and I squirmed like a fish. "Noel... Please... Stop!" I kept laughing and I fell off the bed and ended up on the floor. He picked me up and put me back on the bed. "You know, you are my very best friend." He was always being nice. "I know. And you are mine No." He quickly looked at me and said, "You know I hate that name Nikki." I smiled but it immediately faded when he called me that. "Don't call me Nikki!"

"Don't call me No!" He said with a smart ass tone and we both laughed... I was about to tickle him back, when Michael walked in the room. Tension immediately filled the room. Noel stood up, and waved goodbye without making eye contact. He brushed past Michael as fast as he could, and Michael entered my room, shutting the door. We spent the night together talking, laughing, kissing. It was a so much fun.

"Nikita, Percy wants to see you in ops." One if the guards said so I made my way there. When I walked in everyone looked happy except for Michael. "Nikita… You've been assigned an op." I was so excited. Michael had told me that my next mission would be my graduation. Michael began talking. "You will be going on an overseas mission. Code name.. Josephine."

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Next chapter: Josephine mission


	8. Alter ego

I was just going to update Monday, but nolove10 convinced me soo, here it goes:

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Alter Ego

"Nikita, you can do better than that, now sit straight, cross your legs, and do a very faint smirk." I did as I was told, but this was dumb. I hate flirting. I'm terrible at it. The only reason me and Michael got together was because he was staring at me for some reason. I had to seduce Noel for this exercise. I think he was even more nervous than me. Amanda told me what to say, how and where to touch him, and by the end of the day, Noel was actually sweating. This might affect our friendship, but we can talk about that later. I put a dress on, and she finally tried to teach me how to do my make up because I guess my usual make up is 'too plain.' I did my make up, and picked a dress, and I looked good. I mean I normally look okay but I've never really felt beautiful until now. "Nikita, you look gorgeous." I smiled at Amanda and said, "Thanks... Where's Noel?" She smiled at me, "I dismissed him. He cares for you more than just a friend, you know." I froze. I had known that he liked me but I thought he had gotten over that. "I-I thought he was over whatever it is he feels for me, but you are the psych right?" We both giggled.

I was packing for the Josephine mission. Noel walked into my room. He had been sneaking around here a lot lately. "Hey dude. Here to say goodbye. I know you're gonna miss me." He smiled, and walked over to hug me. He had never done that and it caught me by surprise. "Goodbye Nikita. You can tell me all about it when you get back." I don't think he knew what kind of mission this was, or else he wouldn't be so joyful. I didn't want to talk about it right now so I just said. "Bye Noel." And snaked past him to head to Michael's office.

I walked into Michael's office to find him waiting for me. We haven't been really happy together because of this mission. It's not like I want to sleep with my target for 2 weeks. I have too! "Michael. You were waiting for me…" He smiled and put his hands up in a surrender stance. "I know you have to leave, and I know what you have to do for this mission," He hit a sore spot. I hated all men for years after I got… raped, and now… I have to do it just to get a stupid document? This goes against everything I believe, but I don't have a choice. "but I want you to know, whatever you do in Paris, it won't affect how I feel about you. I love you, and if there was anything I could do to get you out of this mission, I would." I'd been thinking about escape lately, but for some reason, Michael protects Division like it's his baby or something. "I love you too. I feel like I'm cheating on you." He filled the space between us, and embraced me. "You're not cheating on me. We both know why you have to do this. I trust you." He finally captured my lips, and it turned heated. He pushed me against the wall, and we started to dissolve in each other's love. A knock at the door broke up the passion. It was nerd. "Guys, it's time to go." Michael let me go and carries my bags to the car. Before I left, he slipped a note in my hand a mouthed 'I love you' I mouthed it back and I watched as division faded into the darkness.

When I got on the flight I read the note. It said

"Dear Nikita,

I will miss you soo much! Your smile, your laugh, your presence. I wish you didn't have to go but when you get back, and you get promoted to agent status, we will spend every waking moment together. I love you soo much!

Goodbye. –Michael

I could not stop smiling. The thought of me and Michael going on dates again, walking on the Beach, eating breakfast together in a comfortable bed; a big bed, it just makes me so happy. I would get a dog again, since I miss Kota like crazy!

The whole flight was filled with me thinking about my future with Michael. I love him so much, and we have fun together, in both romantic and fun ways. I can't imagine my life without him, and I hope I never have to experience it.

I landed and headed straight for my hotel room. I was supposed to meet my target, today. I felt so wrong. It felt like I was making a transformation, and in a way, I was. I had to act like someone completely unlike myself. A sexual girl, a nasty girl, dare I say it, a whore. I was being easy, and it felt wrong, especially since I was madly in love with Michael. STOP! Focus Nikita, you can do this. I need to get myself together to meet with Voss, so I slowly inhaled, and exhaled and made my way to our meeting point.

We busted through the door kissing. I hated kissing him, and I wanted to throw him out a window, but I had to do this to graduate. He started giving me a hicky and I wanted no reminder of this so I pushed him against the bed, lay on top of him, and started seducing him. When we were done, I lay there next to this monster, and tried not to cry.

My nights were restless. I was supposed to talk to division today since it was the appropriate time to take Voss's information, and he somewhat trusted me since we were sleeping together for 1 week and a half. I had a com in my ear, and they told me how to hack into his computer merely using my heal. Then Michael and his 'men' busted through the door pretending to arrest me. He walked me out the door and wrapped his jacket around me. I was so mad right now. I had bruises up and down my body, and some weren't leaving anytime soon. "Happy now?" I stated, and tears welled up in my eyes. He stopped me and pulled the jacket so I was practically forced to talk to him, "Hey, you will NEVER have to be Josephine again. I promise." I walked away and shed silent tears.

The flight was long and quiet. I had changed, but didn't have enough time to take a shower, and get the germs of Voss off of me, so that made my self-disgust a lot worst.

We arrived at Division, and Percy greeted us with a huge devilish smile. "Nikita, you have debriefing with Amanda, then you come straight to my office." I didn't look at him, I just walked off. When I was on my way to Amanda's, I was greeted by Noel. He immediately saw the tears in my eyes and pulled me into his chest. "Hey, hey… What's wrong?" I couldn't think of anything else, but all the times he touched me, kissed me. I didn't ask for this life. It was forcefully placed upon me, and now there's no going back. "I'm a whore. I had to sleep with this low level thug for two whole weeks, and now, I just feel like dying!" He hugged me harder, and tried to calm me down. When I finally stopped crying, I was happy to see a friendly face that hasn't yet let me go. Noel is my best friend, and I really needed him just then. "Are you gonna be okay?"

"I will be. I just need some time... Thanks for being here for me."

"No problem. That's what best friends are for right." I smiled at him saying that, and he seemed relieved to see me smile. "Right"

When I made it to Amanda's office, she was already there with pen and paper waiting for me. She asked me several questions, and then let me go.

I went to Percy's office, and was greeted with Michael by his side. "Nikita, you did very well on your mission, and before we graduate you, you need to know that because of your charm, you will be going on these kinds of missions quite often." I nodded, and he told me that I've finally graduated. He dismissed me so he and Michael could talk. I quickly left and made my way to the showers.

When the water hit me, it was like I was washing all of my worries away when in reality, I was just washing 'him' away. I could see bruises on my legs, thighs, stomach, back. They were everywhere, and they were all a reminder of who I've become. At that moment, no matter what anyone said, I've never felt uglier.

I wrapped myself in my blankets, and hugged my pillow for dear life. I needed comfort, and I've had enough comfort from a man to last a millennium.

When I woke up, Michael greeted me. We haven't talked much since last night's events. He showed me my house, and my car. I was shocked at how beautiful the apartment was, and how big, and open it was. And the windows, god the windows were amazing. I walked back up to Michael and asked the question I'd been wanting to ask him. "Michael, what are you doing at Division?" He was surprised I was talking to him, and even more surprised that I had asked. "Nikita, I'm not fully ready to dig into that wound again, but someday I'll tell you. My question is, can you ever forgive me?" I was the one who was surprised now. "I'm not necessarily mad at you, I'm just mad at the world. I can feel myself changing because of that place. I used to be nice, and sensitive, but now I feel like a spy playing a part, but the thing is, I never got back to myself. I'm stuck acting like something I'm not and now I don't know who I am anymore Michael." He rushed to me and hugged me hard to his chest. We stayed like that for a while. When I was finally done being sad, he was about to leave. "Michael, stay with me tonight."

"Of course." We made our way to the room, and as soon as I was in my pj's and lying next to him, we started cuddling, and we fell asleep saying I love you back and forth.

Percy's POV:

"He's lost his way, and now he's dating one of our best agents. I don't exactly know which one to kill. They're both extremely valuable Owen. I'll let you pick. Which one will dissolve easier?" He gave me a questioning look, "Mmm Nikita. She's smaller."

"Alright then. You wait a month, and then we will initiate the plan."

"Yes sir." He walked out of my office, probably contemplating what to do. I know Michael trained him which is exactly why I told him. I never intended on him keeping this a secret. I need him to tell Michael so the actual plan can begin. Amanda will love hearing about this.

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Soo what'd ya think? SPOILER ALERT: Amanda will warn Michael of the dangers they face, but will Michael choose loving Nikita, or saving her?


	9. Eulogy

Eulogy

Michael's POV:

Today is Nikita's funeral. I haven't told anyone I'm going, and I have the weekend off, so I decided to go. I know it would only bring Nikita pain about her old life so I mentioned nothing of this to her.

When I got to Nikita's funeral, I thought about her life. It's ironic that she's not even dead, but at the same time, she is. A part of her died the second she stepped into Division. She was a tender and nice girl. She was down to earth, and the most angelic person I'd ever layed my eyes on. Now she's different. It comes with being an agent, but I wish that she could remain her nice and delicate self. If I could go back and change everything, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Ilse gave a beautiful speech about Nikita. She was in tears throughout the whole funeral. Nikita's friend Ryan also came. Ronnie and Alice didn't. Probably rotting in some hole by now. I had to keep crying since I did love the women, and it would look suspicious if I hadn't cried. I had the honor of giving a speech. Some tears that I shed were actually real at the thought of Nikita being gone. "Nikita, such a complex women, I have to say. She was full of light, and full of hope. I fell in love with her instantly you know. She had me at hello. She gave me a new hope for a better future. She showed me how to enjoy life and how to live it right. I can't believe we won't be lying next to each other every single night saying, I love you. I can't believe I won't get to hold her wand when I walk down the street. I can't believe when I drive past her house, it won't be her. I just can't believe she's gone." I broke into tears, at the thought of this 'funeral' almost being real. Ilse hugged me and tried to take me off the stage, but I had one last thing to say. "You know, when I thought about losing her, even for a second, she said something that made me feel happier." I smiled at the thought. "She said: 'No matter what happens, Michael, I will always be in your heart for as long as you will allow me to remain." I exited the stage, and shed silent tears during the whole funeral.

After the funeral, Ilse and I had a conversation about how we were doing. We exchanged numbers, and I was on my way back to my hotel, then in the morning back to America.

Nikita's POV:

I was at Division hanging out with Noel. He was about to go on his graduation mission. I gave him all the support I could. "Nikita, you know if this doesn't go well, I want you to know that-" What the hell? Was this a goodbye speech? "Noel, STOP! You're coming back, and when you get back, you are going to take me skating okay?" Neither one of us has ever been skating, so he promised me that once he got out, we would both go together. "Okay... But before I go, I seriously have to do something." He walked up to me, and kissed me. Oh good God why did he have to do that!? "Just for good luck." He said, and walked away with a smile in his face. Did he not realize he had just ruined our friendship? Michael will be so pissed if he hears about this.

I checked in with Birkhoff to get a visual on Michael's location. I know it was a personal matter, but I needed to know. "Okay Nikki." I sighed at my nickname, but that quickly cleared my mind when I saw him exiting a church with Ilse. She looked good but what was he doing there, walking out of a church with her? There was a billboard that said Nikita Mears. I stopped breathing instantly. He was at my funeral.

I felt extremely sad. That's probably what Michael was trying to prevent, but I couldn't care less at the moment. I was dead. I avoided thinking about it, but all of us in this hell hole are dead. It was just sad seeing it all happen in front of my eyes. A lot of people went. Ryan, my friends from yoga, Ilse even brought Kota. I felt guilty that my friends all thought I was dead but what could I do? Call them up and set them straight? It was safer this way I guess, I just wish they wouldn't suffer over my 'death'.

Michael returned a day after, and he hugged me so hard, he practically cracked my ribs. I knew it was due to my funeral but damn! "Michael, babe you're hurting me." We were in my apartment so no one saw the scenery. "I love you Nikita, I love you so much!" He kept kissing me, and I have to say I was loving every second of it. "Michael, I know why you're doing this. Why didn't you just tell me you were going to my funeral?" I was surprised I wasn't crying. Usually this kind of stuff makes me cry. "I didn't want you to be upset all over again about your old life. I just didn't want to see you hurting again." I understood why he did it; I just wanted to hear him say something nice before I kill the mood. "Michael, I have to go on another mission." His facial expression changed instantaneously. "Is it another one of those missions?" He didn't even need to put emphasis on the word 'that' for me to know what he was talking about. I inhaled, and said, "Yes." He was so mad about this. He grabbed his jacket, and said, "I'll be back!" I knew I couldn't stop him, so I just allowed him to leave.

Michael's POV:

Why does this keep happening to her? Every time she gets close to happiness, it just gets ripped away like a handkerchief. I thought we had a deal with Amanda. She's not supposed to try and rip us apart. She's supposed to help us stay together.

I arrived at Division, and ran straight to Amanda's office. She was sitting there, not acknowledging my presence. "Hello Michael. What's new?"

"Amanda, you know EXACTLY why I'm here."

"Here" She handed me a note, that said when and where to meet her to talk about this. It also says to make Birkhoff cover for us, which is implying that she knows about my relationship with Birkhoff.

I walked into operations and there was the nerd himself. "Birkhoff, I need you to cover for me and Amanda. I have to meet her, and I need you to erase the footage of us being at 'Westwood New Jersey Park.'" Birkhoff just nodded and began hacking the surveillance cameras. He never was one to ask questions which is the main reason I was fond of his company sometimes.

Amanda was already there when I arrived. "Michael"

"Amanda… Why are we here?"

"I needed to talk to you. You haven't been careful." I was so lost… What is she talking about? "Amanda, I have no idea-" I was cut off by her handing me a folder full of pictures of me and Nikita kissing, snuggling, holding hands, the worst part was they were all taken from my apartment, or hers. "How the hell did you get these? Are you spying on me?"

"I wish it was me. These were given to me by Percy. He knows about the two of you, and he plans on fixing your problem after Nikita's mission." I was in awe. Percy knew, and was planning on killing her? What can I do? I have to think of a plan. "Michael, I've already thought up a plan, but you will have to be willing to sacrifice your part of our deal." What was she talking about? If she thought for a second that I was letting Nikita die, she had another thing comin', "Michael, you have to break up with Nikita. In front of the cameras. Make it as un-personal as possible so it will be believable. Percy will be watching, and of he thinks for a second that Nikita and you are not going to let each other go, he'll punish you, in a way that even I think is cruel."

I didn't even want to think about how this would affect her. She would be heart broken, and all because of me. I was about to say 'screw you Amanda' but honestly, she's right. Either I let her be heart broken, or she's dead.

I walked home from the park, and it felt like the longest walk I've ever had. I knew this would break her, but what else could I do? A world without Nikita was unimaginable, so I had to do the right thing to save her life, even if it meant losing her love.

Nikita's POV:

I was so worried. Michael had been gone for two hours now without telling me where he was headed, and I'm starting to get worried. 'He's probably just at Division' I told myself, but deep inside, I had this strange feeling of loss… Not like I had lost something, like I was about to lose something, big and important to me. He walked in just as I was about to follow my instinct to find him. "Michael, thank God! I was starting to get worried!" He didn't hug me back which scared me. "Michael?" I looked at his face, and it looked blank, and emotionless. He only did that when he was in Division so it kind of caught me off guard. "What's wrong?"

"Nikita, I can't do this anymore. I can't keep pretending as if everything's okay because it's not!" Why was he raising his voice at me? He was always gentle with me, and now it's as if he left the real Michael at Division, and brought back the heartless one. "Michael what are you talking about?"

"Nikita, we can't be together anymore." My heart sank immediately. "Michael what are you talking about?"

"Nikita, I tried to make this work… I tried to stay with you but I cannot stay with someone that I do not truly care about." By this time, I already had tears in my eyes, but did not let them fall. I could not let them fall.

"Michael, I love you and I know you love me too! Don't do this! Whatever this is about, we can get through it!" I took his hands in mine. He looked down, and I saw a glimpse of regret, and happiness but as soon as I blinked, it was gone.

"I'm sorry Nikita." I was in his place so I ran out the door before my tears fell. How could he do this to me? I thought he loved me. He said he loved me… Was it all a lie? Why is this happening to me? I had been walking for blocks, and I needed a friend, but Noel was on a mission, Birkhoff isn't really the cry on your shoulder kind of guy, then I had nobody. I cried even harder. I made my way home, and cried til' the sunset. I called in sick, and the medic came to my house, and I had actually had a fever. I think it was an emotional one but it was still a fever. I had to take cold showers, and hold wet towels to my forehead. This was definitely the worst thing that had ever happened to me.

Michael's POV:

During the break up there were various times when I wanted to just hug her, and tell her the real reason why we had to end things, but that would be too risky. If we got caught, then Amanda me and Nikita would be cancelled, and no one would know to save us because no one even knew we were working together, let alone no one knew we were alive.

When she left, I could see tears in her eyes. I had broken her heart, bad. She was trembling during the whole conversation. I couldn't believe I just did that. The women that I loved was now broken hearted because of me.

I tried to sleep, but that was useless. I couldn't stop replaying the scene in my head, and after every statement I made, I said '_You Liar! You Liar!You Liar!' _

I called Amanda to see if she had an update on Percy's decision, and she let me know that after Nikita stormed away, he shut the cameras off, and destroyed them remotely, so now we're clear to do whatever we want without being spied on. After he hung up, he finally let last night's events sink in, and he cried. He wasn't usually one to cry, but when you lose the one you love more than yourself, you have the okay to cry. He cried like this for an estimated 4 hours. By this time, it was already past time to go to work, so he got ready and headed to Division.

When he got there, he had expected to see Nikita there, acting very unpredictable since he had no idea how she would react to seeing him after last nights events, but he was surprised to hear that she was sick. Of course he immediately knew it was because of him, but he didn't want to think about that. Instead, he took his anger out on a punching bag.

Amanda's POV:

Percy and I were watching Michael, and he looked normal, but you could feel the hurt radiating off of his body. "I think he may be a problem." Percy pointed to Michael. "Nikita too. She's sick but I think it's emotional, and not the flu or anything." I completely agreed and knew exactly where he was coming from but I couldn't let him know that. "Percy, these are two of our best agents. They're almost irreplaceable, so give them time. They are both very devoted to Division and there's no telling how long he had real feelings for her. Let them die off then you can judge whether or not to cancel them." He nodded in agreement, and I knew I had just won.

Nikita's POV:

I felt sick every second of every day for 3 days. I couldn't stop thinking, dreaming, and missing Michael. I felt like he took my happiness with him. Tomorrow seemed so far away since I can't even make it through one day without him on my mind… Sometimes I would hear his voice or, smell him, or feel his presence but I knew it was just me desperately missing him.

It was kind of funny how one day you can miss him to death, but now, looking at his spare clothes in my closet, all I wanted to do was light them on fire, or rip them. I decided to both rip, and fry them.

After I threw them in the fireplace, a new feeling came over me… Strength, to move on. I know you can never move on form the love of your life, but he's not worth my tears. I can't keep wallowing while he just lives his life as if I were just a piece of gum suck to his shoe. I'm not going to jeep feeling sad. I need to be strong and pick myself up from the dust. I need to get back to myself, and figure out who Nikita is again. But how do I forget about this ache in my chest that craves him, when the brain in my head wants to forget him?

Michael's POV:

Amanda told me to fix up my attitude, and act as if nothing was bothering me, but I couldn't help but feel worried. Nikita hadn't been back to Division in almost a week. Where was she? As I was walking down the corridor, I spotted her. She looked like she hadn't gotten sleep in forever, but she didn't look sad. She just looked tired. It was as if Amanda told her to fix up her attitude too. She spotted me and waved, and got back to working out. I was so confused. Why the hell wasn't she sad?

Nikita's POV:

I was doing better, but still heart broken. I stayed strong until I saw Michael. I waved, and continued my work out, and waited for him to leave for my facial expression to change to my honest depressed expression. I needed to get myself together, so I went to the showers, got redressed, and headed to ops to get the plans for my next mission as a whore. "Hey nerd, do you have the details for my upcoming mission yet?"

"Yeah Nikki, I sent them to your cell." Thank god! Now I can get out of here. I was about to leave when Noel walked in. "Did you miss me Nikita?" I ran up and hugged him hard. I had been trying to suppress my feelings but the minute he walked in, my strength left my body. "I knew you missed me." I smiled for the first time in a while. He always had a way if making me smile, that's one of the things I loved about him, but I just hope he didn't bring up the big fat elephant in the room. "Nikita, are you alright?" I lied, "Yeah I just missed you, I guess… You are my best guy friend." I hope he got the hint that I didn't want anything romantic. "Yeah, uh you too… So I have to go to ops to Amanda's then Percy's office to graduate, or whatever, but I'll talk to you later." He walked away.

I stopped by the bar as I headed home. I was about to throw the necklace that Michael got me of our birthstones, in the lake, but I decided against it. I held it tight in my hand as I ordered a drink. "Hello miss. What would you like?"

"I would like this pain in my heart to stop, but I guess I'll settle for a bloody merry."

"Okay.. While I make your drink, do you wanna tell me why you're so sad?" I told him the whole story while ordering 5 more bloody mary's. I was so drunk, I couldn't even sit up straight.

"I know how it feels to be heart broken, but you need to know that with every passing day, it gets better." He gave me a sweet smile, and I was just about to pay, and leave when I fell to the floor. He got rushed to me and picked me up. I showed him where I lived, not thinking at all about the fact that I was a spy. He brought me to my room and lay me down. He was debating on whether or not to leave so I told him it'd be okay if he stayed. He complied and took the couch.

When I woke up, my head hurt a little but not enough for how drunk I was, but I always was a fast healer. I was walking to the bathroom when I spotted him. I was about to attack when I remembered why he was here. I continued to the bathroom, and got cleaned up.

When I came out, he was up, and smiling. "Hi"

"Hi.. Are you alright because last night you were all 'the beach is that way' and 'where is my palace.' You were pretty drunk." By then we were both laughing at my drunkenness. "Thank you. I really do appreciate what you did for me uh," He knew I had forgotten his name.

"Daniel."

"Nikita."

I thanked him again, and he gave me his number for in case anything happens since last night I revealed I didn't know anyone in the city so, he helped me. He was very nice, and cute. If I weren't currently going through a heart break, I'd totally go for him.

I was getting ready for my mission, and I was about to walk out to head to the airport, when Noel stopped me. "Nikita, how could you not say goodbye to your best friend?" I knew he was teasing. He almost always greeted me this way. "Oh Noel, I am so sorry.. I wasn't thinking clearly! I will miss you so much! I THINK I MIGHT DIE!" We both burst into laughter. He linked our pinkies together, and said, "I can see that you're nervous about your mission, but just know when you get back, we will go skating okay?" I smiled at how thoughtful he was. "Okay." I hugged him, and he surprise kissed my cheek. I gave him a smile letting him know it was okay that he had kissed me in a friendly way, and I left for the airport.

As I was getting into character, I realized every time I do one of these missions, I come back a little different each time. A piece of me dies after every mission. What I fear most is one day, I will come back changed, and not recognize who I've become.

* * *

Awe! She's going through a rough patch right now. Sorry, whenever I write, I really extend things that should've taken a paragraph, but next chapter, I want to prolong her mission because her fear of losing herself will almost be met. You'll have to read to find out! XD


	10. The Inevitable

This chapter is a lot sadder than the ones I've written before.. :(

* * *

The Inevitable.

It was bound to happen at some point in time. Someone was bound to overpower me, and hurt me to the point of suicide but who knew it would be my target?

Flashback:

When I met my target, he was just in his private booth at the bar. My objective was to of course sleep with him, and get the information that was needed to end his business. He was a terrorist, so we had to go in secretly instead of interrogating him, since terrorists are ALWAYS prepared to die. This particular terrorist liked my kind of girl, so I had to go on this mission, right after being Josephine. Now I'm Sapphire.

I was wearing this extremely short silver dress, that was strapless so I could take it off easier for later, but I hated the dress. It was skanky, and it hit not even an inch under my butt. My shoes were okay though. Not in any way comfortable, but they were okay I guess.

When I walked into the club, I went to the bar to get a drink right before he noticed me.

I didn't expect him to see me so fast, but before I could finish my drink, he was checking me out from afar. He made his way over to me and said, "Who are you?" In a surprised voice. "Who wants to know?"

"I'm Dylan. And you are?"

"No one who you need to know." I put my money down, and he grabbed my wrist, and pulled me into him. "Now, what is your name?"

"Nikita… Now may I leave?"

"I can't let such a beautiful women escort herself out of the club this late. Something might happen to you, so dance with me, and I'll walk you home, sound good?"

"Mmm, no."

"Come on... I promise not to bite." He smiled at me until I finally agreed to dance with him.

We swayed for a while, but when the beat picked up, he began to make me grind against him. His hands were on my hips, and my back was pressed tightly against his chest. I dropped it low, and when I came back up, he began to suck at my neck like a Vampire would, a human. I wanted him to stop before he marked me, so I turned around and captured his lips. He forcefully stuck his tongue in my mouth, and was about to take me right there, so I pulled away, and said, "Do you have a room?" He grabbed my hand, and led me to a hall that led to a private room. He shut the door, and immediately tried to pull up my dress. I stopped him, and asked if he had anything to drink, and he walked to go get some vodka. He poured two glasses, and we toasted. I was about to ask to go to the bathroom to go freshen up when I felt numbness. My whole body went numb after just a few seconds. I looked over at him, and he was smiling. "You know I hate wasting time. You should've just done it the easy way… Now I have to do this the hard way." As he was approaching me, he was taking his belt off. I was panicking. What can I do? I have no backup, I don't know what he gave me, and no com to tell anyone that this creep was about to force me!

He kissed me, and pulled off my dress. Soon he was naked, and sadly so was I. I kept screaming, but with my mouth paralyzed shut, who would hear me? I shut my eyes and in my mind I kept saying things like '_Nooo! This isn't happening! Stop! Please let me go!' _ But all I could do was deny what was happening to me.

When he was finished with me, I felt numb. I couldn't believe that I was a division agent, and I couldn't defend myself. We were supposed to be invisible to these kinds of things, but honestly, we are all expendable.

He told one of his guards to take me somewhere, and he left. What he didn't know was that the drug was wearing off… I just hoped I had enough time to fully recover from the drug.

As soon as my body was now in my control, my adrenaline kicked in, and I prepared myself to fight the man carrying me to god knows where. He had to sneeze, and I took that opportunity to attack. I wriggled out of his arms, and punched him in the face multiple times. He soon fell to them ground, but I continued punching him. I soon found myself crying, and punching him into unconsciousness. My strength, and adrenaline had left my body only leaving regret, and self loathe. I cried next to the dead body, and couldn't stop. I cried for loosing Michael, for being in Division, for the events that had just occurred, and for every wrong I had committed.

I quickly got myself together, and ran home only wearing my ripped dress, and no underwear.

When I got home, I called Division, and they sent a team to bring me home.

Michael's POV:

I had a bad feeling about Nikita's mission. It seemed like this dude was extremely shady. _'Dylan!' _He was probably kissing Nikita as we speak. I quickly cleared my mind of any thought involving her kissing any other man, and started walking to ops to check on the mission.

When I was walking there, the atmosphere seemed to change very negative. Everyone, even the recruits were giving off a very negative vibe. As soon as I saw Amanda, I knew something was wrong. I pulled her into an empty room and asked her what happened. "Michael, I don't know how to tell you this." I already knew who this was about, and her not telling me was starting to urke my nerves. "Amanda, what happened to Nikita!?"

"Michael, her target was not exactly what he was perceived to be. Percy didn't tell us all the details of why he wanted information from this man…" She took a breather, and looked at the ground for the rest of her little story. "He was developing a new drug to temporarily paralyze people for an hour… Well Nikita was his first, patient." It was as if the drug was used on me because I couldn't feel anything. "That's not even the worst part. She was just supposed to get the information! God!.. After he used it on her, he… raped her." My heart started beating fast with rage! HOW THE HELLL COULD THIS HAVE HAPPENED! This is my fault! If I hadn't broken her heart, she would've been in a better state of mind. I should have been there to protect her. She needed me, and I just turned my back on her. I've seen her depressed but this, this could break her… Completely.

Nikita's POV,  
Present day:

Everything was moving so fast. One minute I'm in an airplane, the next minute I'm walking into Division. I wasn't fully focused since I was replaying the scenes in was mind of what just happened. The hunger in his eyes was outrageous. His pleasure was disgusting. The way I felt? Dead, not myself, no hope, no happiness… No future.

As the squad escorted me down the halls, I began to focus my eyes again. I was in he training room, and all the recruits were focused on me. I'm guessing somehow they know. Which means everyone knows. Birkhoff, Michael, Noel.

I wonder if they'll cancel me. To be honest, at this point, all I want to do is die. This world has nothing left to offer me. I work at a job where they've ruined my life and faked my death, the love of my life broke up with me, my best friend has a crush on me… What isn't crazy about my life, and it's all because of this place.

We finally made it to Amanda's office, and she looked like she actually cared about my well being. They let me go and shut the door on their way out. Amanda looked behind me and said, "You have 10 minutes." Then she walked past me and out the door. I didn't turn around because I was still in a daze. "Nikita." I looked forward, and there stood Michael. "I am soo sorry! I shouldv'e been there to protect you… I never meant for any of this to happen! I'm so sorry! This is all of my fault!" He hugged me to hard, and I just let him. I just didn't have the energy to push him away. "Nikita, when I relocate this guy, I will kill him… Believe me." He was starting to get mad, but all I could think about was him killing Dylan. I silently muttered, "I wish you would kill me." He let go of me and looked into my teary eyes. "Nikita don't say that! You cannot give up on your life because of this rapist!" I finally started to focus all the way, and replied. "Well why not Michael? My life has been a living hell every single day! My parents giving me up, to my foster parents taking every ounce of happiness I had and throwing it away, to me getting on drugs, then when I finally get back to a normal life of happiness, I'm put in here to kill, to…. Whore my way around these filthy men, and then you… You gave me happiness and pulled it away. I tried to live with it, but I have nothing, NOTHING left to live for!" I was crying so hard, all I could feel was wetness on my face, and him hugging me. His shirt became wet right away, and I don't think he cared.

When I was fully done crying, he looked me in the eyes, and told me something that I'd been wanting to hear. "Nikita, I want to be with you… You have no idea how hard it is to not be with you, but I have some unfinished business that I can't finish if I'm with you." Amanda walked in before I could reply and said, "That's enough." Michael looked at me in a disappointed face, and left the room.

Amanda tried to ease my pain, but I knew from experience that only time could make this feeling go away.

I headed home, and as soon as I closed the door, I headed for the shower. I hadn't gotten the chance to clean off his scent so I needed to do so now. When the water hit my body, it felt like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I looked at my body and there were bruises everywhere. Pink, blue, purple, all over my body. There was even a hicky on my neck. After my body recovers, my mind, and my heart will still be in pain. I just wish all the scars left all together.

When I got in my bed, I hugged my pillow as if my life depended on it and again, cried myself to sleep.

In the morning I felt completely different. No longer was I a sad victim, but a women with a stubborn attitude, a stronger person, and one who shall no longer shed tears. I will work harder, train harder, and try to keep my humanity at the same time, if it's possible.

Division was quiet as soon as I walked through its doors. Recruits all looked at me like, 'oh my gosh what is she doing here?' I don't fully blame them. I didn't think I'd be strong enough to come in this early but I guess I can still surprise myself.

I went to nerd's office to hang out with an old friend only to remember why I gave him that nickname. All he talked about was shadownet, and how fast he can hack. "Bye Birkhoff." I had to leave before I blew my ears off. "Whatever Nikki! Someday you're gonna need shadownet, and we won't be able to help you!" I chuckled and exited the room. I went to Amanda's to see if I could do any field work, and she told me there was a mission, but that I should cool it for a while.

A month Later:

I'm going on an overseas mission to retrieve a flash drive holding information on the people who hold military weapons, and are planning an act of terror. I had to flirt with this man, and act as if I liked him only for a few hours. Nothing more. I was about to leave when Noel stopped me. "Nikita, I was looking for you."

"Noel, I'm in a rush. I swear I'll call you when I land." He just stopped, and watched me walk out of Division.

When I landed I called him, and we talked the whole way to my hotel room. We said our goodbye's and I got ready for tonight's events.

I had tried to zip up my dress, but it would not go up. I was stuck. I was checking myself out in the mirror when I heard a knock at the door.

I grabbed my gun, and opened the door only to reveal Michael on the other side of it. "Michael, hi." He stepped into the room, looking absolutely handsome, but I kept that to myself. "What are you doing here?"

"Percy thought that a lovely women like yourself wouldn't go to a gala without a date, so here I am."

"Percy thought?"

"Yeah"

"Well since you're here, I need help… I'm stuck." We both smiled, and I turned around so he could zip me up. "So I guess this counts as our first overseas mission together."

"I guess so."

"It feels different. No big Division eye, watching over us." He cut me off.

"I'm the big Division eye." I faced him, when he was done with my zipper, and said. " Then how do I look?"

He smiled and said. "Perfect."

That made me smile very wide. His compliments always made me happier. "Good answer," Then I walked close to him, "You can surprise me anytime." Then I exited the room, knowing he was right behind me. We headed towards the gala, and when we reached the doorway, he put his hand on my waist.

We walked in and everyone was staring at us. The guys, at me and the girls, at him. I saw our target eyeing us, so we made our way to the bar. Our target appeared, and as I was about to ask him a question, he started talking to Michael.

As we were talking to him, I realized he was eyeing Michael more than me. That's when I realized he doesn't like girls. Him and Michael walked away deep in conversation, and I made my way up to his room to retrieve the flash drive.

It was easy enough getting the flash drive, and I made my way back to Michael to rescue him from our target getting to touchy with Michael. I laughed at my sudden jealousy of Michael getting our targets attention.

We were back at the room, and we busted out laughing at the fact that Birkhoff hadn't caught the fact that our target wasn't into women. "When did you figure out?"

"When he was paying more attention to you then he was to me."

"Well, I do make an excellent honey trap."

"Michael, you could've kept him distracted a little longer."

"A little longer and I'd have to shoot him." I giggled at his homophobia.

"Did you get it?"

"Oh of course… All in one piece."

"Great."

"Unlike my ego," I stumbled on my shoes, and he caught me, as always. Our faces became centimeters apart as he took off my shoes. "Nikita, the man is gay."

"So…" Then he looked into my eyes. "You know what, you're right… You do make an excellent honey trap." He smiled, then we both eyed each others lips. He moved up, as I moved down, and we began to kiss. He put his hand on my face, and mine went to his shoulders. We both moved so that I was laying on the bed, and he was on top of my. We were making out for the first time in a few months. Our tongues dancing in a sort of tango. I began to undo his tie, when he pulled away. Here we go again, I thought. We were both breathing hard, and he lowered his face to my chest and whispered, "I can't"

"Michael," I whispered back, "we're in the middle of nowhere."

"It's not about that," He moved off of me, and I was so confused. "It's not about Division, it's not about… you. It's about my wife." Say what? He has a wife? Well I don't know everything about him, but was he cheating on her, or me? I blinked and said, "Your what?"

"My daughter." His face got serious at the mention of them. I didn't know he had a kid. This is all so crazy. "You're married and you have a daughter?"

"No, no I-I did… They're gone… They were killed in a car bomb March 21st 2001." I felt so bad... His whole family was killed by a car bomb? My immediate thought was it was definitely no accident. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"Nobody knows… Only, Percy and Amanda… Now you." He looked sad until his next statement. Then he got mad. "And Kasim."

"Kasim Tariq?"

"Before 2001 Kasim wasn't a famous terrorist, he was a low-level snitch. And all that changed when he betrayed me. After he killed my family, and became a hero, I was Alkida. That's the reason I joined Division… To find him. And until I kill him I can't, move forward." He finally looked me in the eyes, and for the first time since our relationship ended, I saw truth. I finally knew why he couldn't be with me. Or so I thought.

The next morning, I acted as if nothing had happened. Michael, on the other hand kept looking at me weird. "What?"

"I thought after all the things I'd said to you to push you away, you'd hate me. It's just nice to know you still care about me." I didn't like him bringing up things like that, so I tried to rush out of the room, but he of course had other plans. "Nikita, please don't do this. I just want to be around you. I still care about you too, and I just want to be around you. I need to be around you." I understood where he was coming from, but it didn't mean that I would let him treat me any kind of way. "Nikita, would you go on a walk with me? We do have 2 days until we have to go back."

"Is there a beach nearby?" He smiled and told me to get ready.

While we were walking, he took my hand in his. He was really confusing me with his revelation, and then his affection towards me, I'm not sure whether to be romantic back, or to put a wall between us, but either way, it was nice being around him again.

We finally made it to the beach, and as I took my clothes off revealing my red bikini, Michael's eyes widened in attraction. I couldn't help but do the same when I saw his abs. They had gotten bigger since the last time I'd seen them.

We were walking near the shore when I heard my name being called. "Nikita?"

I looked back to see my old best friend wide-eyed at me being alive. "Ilse?"

* * *

What now? Are they going to tell her how Nikita's alive?

Spoiler Alert: Don't believe that Nikita can wait forever for Michael to make up his mind about what he wants. Nikita will be dating Daniel.


	11. Transformation

Hey guys! Sorry for not updating sooner. My, let's call him a 'friend' Alex kept me distracted all night! Anyways, did you have a good Thanksgiving? Sorry this cliffhanger doesn't allow me to write about this warm holiday, but for Christmas, I promise not to disappoint.

* * *

Transformation.

"Ilse?" My eyes became wet immediately following Ilse reappearance. My best friend or better yet my sister was here. I hadn't seen her in almost 10 months! I had missed her so much. I run up, and wrapped my arms around her, and had to hold back my tears. "I missed you so much Nikita! I knew you couldn't be dead, I just knew it!" She was crying so hard, I almost couldn't fathom what she was saying.

Just as I was about to pull away from Ilse, a shot rang out. My stomach felt moist, and that's when everything went blue.

Owen's POV:

Percy had told me to follow Nikita, and Michael just in case this mission became too emotional. I didn't know who Michael and Nikita were since I was trained by Brant and I never met Nikita. I also didn't quite understand their relationship, but if Percy wanted this done, I would do whatever it took.

As I was watching their hotel room's window from the street, I looked over Nikita's personal file. It had a few pictures of people she used to know that we, for some reason didn't kill, so if I saw any of these people, they were to be eliminated quickly.

I watched as Nikita, and Michael descended from there hotel, and began to walk, hand in hand. I didn't actually care of they had a romantic relationship. I was here to do a job, not get the 411 on the Michael and Nikita drama.

I jumped out of my car, and walked 20 paces behind them. They were supposed to be the best Division agents but they were actually pretty terrible at noticing when they were being followed.

I saw them go near the beach so I hid between some very big bushes, so I could use my scope to spy on them without any useless civilians noticing.

A familiar looking girl started to crying in front of Nikita, and hugged her. I looked down at the pictures and then everything clicked. I didn't have to think twice about taking aim. I got my gun in perfect range, and pulled the trigger, '_boom'._

Nikita's POV:

I looked down to see if it was me that got shot, but I was disappointed to see my sister figure with a bullet hole through her chest. I screamed as she fell into the sand. "NOO! NO, No, No, No, No!" Michael tried to cover me from any other shots but through my eyes, all I saw was Ilse on the sand, still conscious but barely breathing. I made Michael release me, and I ran to her side trying to put pressure on the wound. "Ilse, Ilse look at me! I'm gonna get you out of here okay?"

"Nikita, don't have to give me that crap. I know I'm dying." She gave me a weak smile as I began crying, and a tear escaped her eyes. She continued to talk to the best of her ability. "Nikita, I love you! You are my very best friend, and my biggest inspiration. I am dying, but that's okay. I had a very nice life, and I have you to thank for all the fun." She gave me a weak smile. "Just do me one last favor, would ya?"

"Of course, anything."

"Wear your necklace every Monday for me okay? It'll make sure you will remember me forever, and that I will always be with you. No matter what."

As she said that, I thought about what that day meant to us as best friends.

Flashback:

It was a sunny Monday. Me and Ilse were 20 years old, and we were walking through downtown when we saw this little boutique with really cheap stuff, so we went in. When I saw these matching necklaces that were of 2 French girls with half hearts that were magnetically drawn together whenever they were close to the other. It reminded me of our relationship, because we were never too far apart. "Ilse, look!" I told her to come look at the best friends' necklaces. "These are best friends' necklaces! We should get them."

"Oohh and they're cute. Looks like they match everything we would wear." She made a goofy smirk at me that always made me laugh.

I smirked and replied. "Yeah so we should get them, and wear them every Monday!"

"Why Monday?"

I made an appalled face. "Do you not remember Monday was the day we met 2 years ago? Wow!?"

She laughed and replied, "I remember the date, not the day."

"Whatever, so are we gonna do it?"

"Mmm, okay. Let's buy them 'best friend.'" She winked at me, and we giggled, walking to the cash register.

Present:

I came back to reality, and said, "I will always remember you Ilse! You are my best friend too, and I love you... So much!"

She smiled, and coughed up some blood and I knew she was a few seconds from being gone forever.

I took her hand and she spoke the last words that would escape her mouth, "Goodbye, Nikita. I will never forget you!" I felt her hand go limp, and I knew she was gone. I squeezed it harder, and began to sob. I slowly looked up at her, and shut her eyes, as I sobbed harder into her blood soaked shirt.

I felt Michael try to grab me but I couldn't just leave her here. I forced myself to stop crying and said, "Michael, I can't just leave her here." He just nodded, and gave us a few minutes, as he began to search for who did this. I wanted to know who fired the shot too, but by now they were probably gone.

We took Ilse to the Hospital, and let them call her parents, and her brother. They'd take care of her, and I would be happier knowing her family was notified about her passing. Before we left Ilse' body, I put her necklace tight around her neck, and said, "Goodbye, my old friend." I kissed her forhead and walked out of the Hospital, leaving a part of my heart with my deceased best friend.

Michael held my arms, and guided me back to the Hotel room, and as we got there, my brain finally began to function again. 'I bet this was Division! They always kill people for hire, or for themselves, and I fit perfectly into that category! This was my fault… I could've saved her. I should've protected the only person who knew the real me, before Division snatched it away. I should've been on higher alert of our surroundings.' Michael started to envelop me, as I realized I was crying. "I'm so sorry Nikita." I cried harder thinking about never seeing my best friend ever again. Never watching romantic movies with her, never crying on her shoulder about anything, never having that one person who NEVER sees the bad in me, never doing yoga together, and never eating lunch together. I never imagined my 'job' would lead straight to her. Now what? As this question developed in my mind, a new emotion replaced my grief. It was anger. I knew who had done this to her, and I knew now, that I had to get out of Division, and get my revenge.

Michael felt me turn angry, and began to worry. "What is it?"

"I know who did this."

He looked surprised by the sudden change in my demeanor. "Who?"

"It was Division." His eyes went dull before he replied, "Just go to sleep. You're not thinking clearly. Your judgment is clouded by grief." He snuggled me closer not realizing the hurt his words caused me. "Michael, I lost my best friend today." I took a breather as tears began to reappear at my eyes. "I DO know who did this. It was Division!"

He began to get a little frustrated, himself. "How could you know that?"

"I have a feeling. Remember when Amanda told you Percy knows about us? Well what makes you think he wouldn't have someone follow us? This is our first mission together without Division watching." He looked like he was considering this accusation, but he quickly denied it. "Nikita, Division has done a lot of things, but it is not capable of doing this."

"Oh here we go." I said turning my back towards him.

He looked confused and said, "What?"

I had turned around in a swift movement and replied,"You defend Division over everything. You always have, and I'm starting to believe you always will!"

"I'm not defending Division as much as I'm trying to help you! I know that look in your eyes. You want revenge. If you try to go against us, you will only get yourself killed!" As he finished his sentence, he realized what he just said, and how much it hurt me.

"Us?"

"Nikita, I didn't mean it." He walked up to me, and tried to hug me, but I pushed him away from me, and grabbed a pillow and a blanket, and threw them at Michael's face. He looked at me with a half apologetic, half mad look and said, "Fine!" before exiting the room.

I cried that night over Ilse' departure, and that's when I remembered what she'd told me.

I began to look through my suitcase, still crying and retrieved my necklace. I held it against my chest as I fell asleep thinking about Ilse.

When I woke up, my mind drifted to last nights' events. I had thought about Michael, some but I knew if he hadn't realized how bad Division was, there was no way in Hell he was leaving it. Especially since he was still striving for his revenge. I honestly want to wait for him, I just wanna know if there's anything to wait for. When he's ready he'll come to me, but for now, I can't stand to be alone. I needed to talk to him because I was confused if he even still loved me.

I hopped in the shower, and felt my knots slowly begin to disappear like a magic trick. When I stepped out of the shower, I picked out what I was wearing, and made my way out of my room.

When I saw Michael, he was drinking coffee, and soon had a guilty look on his face. "Good morning." He said without looking into my eyes.

"Morning." He walked up to me, still not making eye contact and handed me a cup. "Michael, you know we have to talk about this." He knew exactly what I was referring to. "I know. Just- before we open Pandora's Box, can I just hold you?" I was surprised by his desperation, but I understood he needed this, and honestly, so did I. I nodded letting him know it was okay, and within milliseconds, he was hugging me as tight as he could. I let a sigh escape my lips, but at the moment, I didn't care because he was the last person on this Earth who knew everything about me, and still wanted to be around me.

I distanced myself from him, and began to start a discussion that I'm sure could only end badly. "Michael, I know you want to get revenge for your family, and now more than ever I understand what it is that you are going through, but you cannot keep stringing me along." He knew he was at fault as he nervously stroked the back of his head. "I know." He got mad at himself for showing how much of an emotional toll this conversation had on him. He advanced right up to me. "Nikita, from the day I met you, you were supposed to be nothing but a mission. That changed all too fast for me to even remember. I slowly fell in-"

"Don't. I know what you're going to say. Just don't."

"Nikita, you know how much I, do. But do you love me enough to wait for me."

"Michael, even if I did wait for you, would you ever be able to leave Division?"

He looked down, and the realization hit both of us that we weren't going to be together… Ever again.

I replied without allowing him to answer. "I am taking revenge for my best friend, just like you're taking revenge for your deceased wife, and child. I wouldn't ask you to give up on that, so you can't ask me either, Michael."

"I know…I'm sorry." I let a tear escape my eyes, as the pain from my chest grew greater.

"I am too."

"I didn't plan for this."

"There is no plan for this." He gave me one last kiss that lasted longer than it should have. I wrapped my arms around his neck, as he wrapped his around my waist. I continued to cry as the kiss lingered on. He stuck his tongue into my mouth and I thought 'what the hell. It's not like we're ever gonna do this again.' I gladly accepted, and stuck mine in his. It was about to lead to something to more complicate this already complicated situation, so I pulled away. He pecked my lips one last time, as I tried to remember the feel of his lips on mine. I let go of his neck, but he held onto my waist. "You need to know something, Nikita." I looked into his eyes, and he finished his statement by saying, "After I get my revenge, I will come for you, and I will NEVER give up on you." He let go of my waist, and walked out the room.

When we had boarded the plane, Michael and I both knew it would be the last time we would probably ever talk about us, but we decided not to. Instead he took my hand in his, and held on tight the whole plane ride. As I looked out the window, I remembered how Ilse had always wanted to go on a plane and travel to France. I would have to go there in memory of her someday.

When we landed Michael still hadn't let go of my hand. Only when we entered Division did he release it, and put on his hard serious face on for the boss.

After the briefing, Michael gave me an 'I love you' look and we walked our separate ways. I think he knew all of his last minute affection would make me wait for him. I really did want to, but after his revenge he will be confused. He lived only on revenge for 2 years, and he's too used to having that as motivation. He won't know what to do with himself, so he'll start working more. I can't wait for a lost cause, so yes, I have to move on. No matter how much it hurts, and boy does it hurt!

I decided to get started on my plan to go rogue when my plan was foiled by a very nice man. I was in the supermarket, looking for my favorite vegetarian dish, when I slipped on something, and was caught by a familiar bartender. "Nikita!"

"Daniel?"

"Hey! How've you been?" He looked into my eyes, as he helped me stand up straight. "I've been better."

"What's wrong?"

"Uh, I don't know why I'm telling you this, but my best friend just passed away." I couldn't help the tears that appeared as I thought about my friend being 6 ft. under. "Oh... I'm sorry Nikita." He hugged me very tight, as I pulled my sadness back, which was replaced by a fake smile. "I'll be fine, I just need time… And a distraction."

"Well how's this for a distraction." He pointed to the junk food in his cart. "I was going to go to a party, but you need company." He grabbed my hand, and led me to the junk food aisle. I giggled when we got there thinking 'he has no idea how much his presence is helping me.' "Okay, go nuts. I'm paying. Go pick out what you want, and we can have a crazy night." His happy attitude was actually cheering me up. "Okay." I smiled at him, and pecked his cheek before picking out the healthiest junk foods I could find.

After reading a million labels, I gave up, and started picking things that looked good. Daniel laughed at how I am unfamiliar with junk food.

"What are you laughing at?"

"It's just funny that you don't know what anything is, that's all."

I smiled and replied, "Whatever!" And we made our way to the cash register.

When we got to Daniel's place, I was surprised to see how elegant it was. I mean he probably had good taste, but being a bartender he probably couldn't afford all this. "Daniel, your place is amazing!" He smiled at my surprised expression. "What, because I'm a bartender, I can't afford nice things?" he looked at me with an amused face, "Just kidding! But you should have seen your face... My parents are rich, and I work part time at the bar, and full time at the company we own."

I made an 'oh' with my mouth as he took out all the junk food we had.

We spent the night talking and laughing, when he turned on a movie. It was a horror film, and I didn't want him to know how terrified I was of scary movies, so I allowed it for a while. When it got too scary, I covered my face with a blanket. I didn't realize I was scooting closer and closer to Daniel, and before I knew it, I was practically in his lap. He looked at me with such compassion, that I began to feel something for him. It snuck up on me, and before I could think about anything else, he leaned in and kissed me. I hesitated for a minute, but then kissed him back. He wasn't Michael, but for now he was definitely the type of comfort I needed. I grabbed his face, and he grabbed my waist harder, and after the movies volume rose, we broke away remembering what was going on around us. He was the first to mention anything though. "Nikita is you want to wait, I can let this go and just be your friend." I was still mesmerized by the kiss to actually listen to what he was saying. "Shut up and do that again." I leaned forward, and kissed him with all the passion I could. I positioned myself so that he was in between my legs. We made out until I forced myself to stop, thinking about how fast things were moving. I pulled away, and sat next to him, but gave him hope for our relationship by holding his hand.

We spent the rest of the night literally talking about absolutely nothing. I said goodnight, but he wouldn't allow me to go home since it was 2 a.m. "Nikita, It's way too late for you to be going home alone. What if something happens to you?" Little did he know that I could kill someone without even thinking about it. "I'll be fine. No need to worry." I smiled at his protectiveness. "Well then can you stay here just to ease my worries? If anything happened to you, and I didn't protect you, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself." Awe! He cared about me? That's so nice. "Okay, but don't even think about any funny business." He laughed at my accusation. He of all people would never take advantage of me, and I knew that. "Nikita, you know I'm not like that. If you want, I'll just sleep on the couch." I didn't want him to sleep on the couch. I also didn't want to rush things but I knew I needed some comfort tonight, since these past few days have been beyond me. Wow, what's amazing is, I hadn't thought of any of my problems when I was with Daniel. He really is good company. "No, I'm not kicking you out of your bed. Sleep next to me." He grabbed my hand and led me to the bedroom. "And for the record, it's not like we hadn't slept in the same bed before... When you were drunk, I fell asleep along with you. I woke up in the middle of the night and went to the couch, but the majority of the night, we definitely spooned." We were both cracking up for another 5 minutes.

After he gave me one of his large t-shirts, I wore that, and my underwear. He wore his t-shirt, and some pajama bottoms. When he caught sight of me, I could see his eyes skimming my body. "Um okay, well Uh, good night." He made his way to the bed and faced his back towards me. I got in bed too, but not before asking him about his sudden stand-off attitude.

"What's wrong?" He sighed, and flipped over so his back was on the mattress, and he was facing the ceiling. "Nikita, do you not realize how amazingly beautiful- no sexy you are? I'm not able to gentlemanly to you if you look that sexy. I am still a man, and being this close to you is making me lose my control." I was astonished by his revelation. "Just-just hold me. If you can't bear it anymore you can turn away, and I will respect that. I just need some comfort right now, and I want it to come from you, Daniel." He smiled and turned towards me finally, and as I snuggled closer to his body that was facing mine, I intertwined our fingers.

Before I did anything else, I decided to peck his lips for his kind words, and kindness in general. That turned out to be a bad idea, because a horny man and a peck on the lips always turns into something else. He pulled me closer and we began to make out again. I guess this was the kind of losing control he was talking about. He slowly stuck his tongue into my mouth, and I opened wider for him to fully French kiss me. I layed myself on top of him as we began to undress each other. You can guess what happened next.

* * *

So how did you like it? I tried to get deeper into Daniel and Nikita's relationship since **no one** seems to care about how much they did together, so I wanted it to be written. I am not going to do all their relationship, but I'll try to flashback after his death. Oh and Ilse, sorry for killing you girl. It was the only way! Soo sorry!


	12. Part 1: Magnets

So sorry for not updating sooner, my monsterous little sister 'accidently' dropped my laptop, and it shut down, and I hadn't saved this chapter, so due to this incident, and the lack of my perfectionist ways, it took long, but I will try to not do that again! Promise XD

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Part 1: Magnets

7 months into their relationship:

Daniel was so beautiful in the morning with his messy hair, and arms wrapped around my body. He made me feel something that even Michael couldn't gove me. Security.

"Daniel, babe I have to go to work." He was kissing me fiercely and wouldn't let me go. "Nikita, come on. You know you want to stay!" He was kissing every inch of my face, and neck. If he kept this up, I wouldn't be able to control myself. "Just 5 more minutes Nikki." He said as he began to grab something from his nightstand drawer.

Or we could spend the rest of our lives together." He plopped an engagement ring right in front of me, and I was totally caught off guard. I looked over at him and put my hand in front of my mouth in shock, "Oh my God! Oh my God! Daniel, it's beautiful!" I playfully punched him on the chest, and being the goofy man he is, played along with me. He whimpered in fake pain, and I rolled on top of him, "Oh did I hurt you Baby?" He was now trying to hold onto his last thread of control, as I kissed my way up from his chest to his lips. I picked up the ring, and put it slowly on my finger, and boy was it dazzling! "Daniel, it's beautiful!" I stared at the ring until my eyes began to tear up, due to the fact that I hadn't blinked in a full minute.

"I tried to find a pretty ring, but nothing; I mean NOTHING could be as beautiful as you, Nikita." I shed a tear at his poetic words. He wiped it as I leaned into his hand caressing my cheek, and for the first time I kissed my fiancée.

It's funny how the first person I thought to tell about my engagement was Michael, which was also the only person (other than Percy) that I wanted to keep it from. I knew Michael still loved me, but the sad thing about love is it doesn't always work. You get hurt, you recover, and you move on. But sometimes, if you're lucky, you find your way back to each other like a magnetic attraction.

I knew I was about to go on a mission, Operation Black Night. My objective was to be Whitfield's protector for the night. He was a friend of Percy's, and being 'the nice man Percy is' I had to both protect, and pleasure him. Sleeping with another man felt surreal. I loved Daniel, more than I thought possible. He was my knight, and I was his princess. When I'm with him, I just feel like nothing else exists, just us. Now I have to sleep with some arms dealer that I haven't even met? Daniel was my soul mate, and I knew with all my heart that I loved him, so how could I even dream about being unfaithful? The real question is am I willing to refuse and risk my life, or go through with the mission and risk my relationship with the man I loved?

Michael had been in ops with Birkhoff, and all the other tech geeks. When I walked in the room, I saw 6 set of eyes stationed on me. Michael's eyes were the ones I wanted to see, but he was 'focused' on something else. I just brushed them off and said, "Michael, can we talk?" He turned towards me, and did an annoyed eye-roll as we strolled to his office.

I closed his door, and began to talk. "I haven't seen you in a while, huh? I was starting to believe you were avoiding me."

"Nikita cut the crap." Oh wow! Why's he mad THIS time.

"What are you talking about." He took a deep breath before continuing to talk.

"Do you love him?"

"Michael, we're engaged."

He gasped, and looked away for a very long time.. The agony in his voice almost made me feel as if I had cheated on him or something.

"I don't know what else to do." I found it too hard to look into his broken eyes, so I looked down, as he did.

"Michael, why are you sending me on this mission?" I said softly since we were both a little hurt by our previous conversation.

"I didn't order this... Trust me." Our eyes simultaneously rose to meet each other's. I could now tell he couldn't stand me going just as much as I didn't want to go, but who cares what you think if your actions can't help the situation.

I grabbed my bags, and headed to Percy's office for the new Intel for my mission in 24 hours.

After Percy told me about how important this mission was, I snuck and headed home to tell my fiancée I had a sudden trip to make.

"Honey, Honey?" I dropped my bags, and began searching for Daniel.

"I'm in here." I heard him from the bedroom.

"Hey babe." He was lying down on the bed just relaxing. How I had wished I could just live without a huge target scraped across my chest.

"Hi." I layed next to him, and held hid hand in mine, intertwining our fingers.

"What are you doing back so early?" I was definitely about to spoil his mood.

"Daniel," I gripped at his fingers even tighter, letting him know I was serious. "I have to leave for a few days. My job has this big serious conference, in Morocco, and I have to attend." His face, the one with the usual smile, had faded. "Nikki, we just got engaged. Is there any way you can stay?" If only he knew how much I wanted to stay, not just today but forever. "No, I have too. I'm so sorry babe." I gave him the sad face that always makes him forgive me, and just like that we were happy again. "How much time do we have?"

"Less than 15." He sighed, and pulled me on top of him.

"I'm gonna miss you so much, my Love." He was impersonating a British accent that always failed, and led to me giggling. "Je vais te manquer aussi!" Whenever I spoke French to Daniel, he would melt like ice on a grill. "Mhhhmmm." He took hold of my lips, and soon took my tongue, too. We were in a full fledged makeout, and I almost forgot what I had to do, next. I pushed him down on the bed, and we both let out a disappointed sigh.

"Let me take you to the airport." He helped me off the bed, and grabbed my bags on the way to the door.

When we made it to the airport, he told me the news of his parents lakehouse.

"How's about this. In 4 days when I return, we both go there, and we spend the weekend having, fun." I winked at him when I said fun, and he knew what I meant.

"Or we could meet at the lakehouse, and we could still enjoy the fun." I looked at him weird wondering why he didn't wanna be home.

"Nikita, that bed smells like you. We've slept in it since we moved in together, and even before that. I can't sleep there knowing you won't be lying next to me. It's too painful." I made an 'awe' face and kissed him for the last time in days. He began to slide his tongue into my mouth and grab my waist, again. Damn, his lips were so soft, and addicting.

When I got on the plane, all I could think about was how much I'm gonna miss him. I loved him with every bit of my heart, and I needed to feel his presence to be okay, but I guess for a few days, I'll just have to relish that exhilarating kiss.

* * *

What did you think? Good bad? I know you guys thinks she loves Daniel with all her heart, and I think at some extent she did, but then when Michael came around, it was all clouded. But anyways, coming up, as you know the death of her lover boy, Daniel. Awe!


	13. Part 2: Unexpected

So sorry for not updating sooner, but it was my birthday and I went on vacation. Next time I will update before my vacation... I promise.

* * *

Part 2: Unexpected

_"Michael, I know you and Nikita have some 'chemistry' but if you want her alive, you need to break it off, NOW!" Percy's eyes, although full of unadulterated rage, didn't frighten me. My fear was based on the thought of my angelic Nikita, dead and gone. "If you touch a single hair on her head, I will rip you apart piece by piece, you son of a bitch!" He smiled with so much venom; I could almost taste it in my mouth. "Very funny choice of words, Michael." He opened the door to reveal my only two weaknesses in the world. The one being dragged in by her beautiful hair was my weakness full of love. Nikita, she was so cultivated, yet she hadn't spent much time in school. She was wise, although she had been a drug addict. She had this way of scrunching her nose that made her look so cute, and infantile. She has a real way with words, and she easily gets herself out of trouble. Her charisma level is off the charts, and seeing her getting pulled by her hair, made me Imprudent. I ran up to Kasim, but before I could reach him, a shot fired out. I looked at Nikita, and the look on her face was all the indication I needed to figure out what had happened._

_She had been shot. My imprudence, along with my anxiety had grown and before I could even think about calming down, I kicked the gun out of Kasim's hand, grabbed it, and shot straight through both Kasim, and Percy's heads. I hurried to Nikita's side and felt for her pulse. It was weak, but it was also existent, so she was alive. "NIKITA! NIKITA!" I kept yelling it as if it were an incantation or something. She coughed up a bit of blood and let out an exhausted sigh. "Michael, how could you do this to me? Is this my punishment for loving you? All I ever wanted was a normal life!" After every statement I repeated an 'I know, I'm sorry!' but nothing could stop the caustic, heartbroken pain I feel in my chest that wasn't leaving my body anytime soon. "I'm so sorry. I never meant for this to happen! I loved you! I still love you. I was just confused, and foolish, and…. Selfish." As her breathe labored she muttered her very last words. "Goodbye Michael." I finally let my tears fall as her pulse dissipated. _

I woke up with a huge intake of breathe. "What just happened?" My clock read 6:47. I glanced around my bedroom only to conceive that I had just had a nightmare.

I yearned for Nikita's affection, but she is out of reach at the moment due to her mission. Operation Black Night had made her feel inadequate, and I was as much to blame as anyone. I promised her she wouldn't have to do 'those' kinds of missions anymore, and I hadn't kept my word. I needed to make amends and that's how I ended up outside of her home.

Nikita's POV:

It's been a few minutes since I landed, and I already have a bad feeling about this mission. I felt as though this mission isn't about to turn out well, but my gut feelings aren't the most accurate things in the world, so I decided to push it to the edge of my mind and call Daniel; as promised.

"Hey, honey I landed safely, and I miss you already."

"I miss you too, babe. You know, you never told me you had a coworker that lived a block away; 'what's your name?" He muttered in the background while my heart was racing faster than a cheetah's pace. "Oh, yes. Michael." My heart dropped even lower. The last time I talked to Michael, we didn't end things on the best of notes' and from his reaction, he wasn't exactly fond of my relations with Daniel, so my only thought was to have him try to escape, or make Michael rethink his agenda; whatever it was.

"Honey, can I speak to Michael?" I couldn't cover up my exasperation filled tone, so I'm guessing Daniel was confused. "Babe, its nothing I promise. Just have a question for Michael is all." He gave me an abdicating sigh and handed the phone over to the man who was at the wrong place at the wrong time.

"Michael, what the HELL are you doing here!?" I had known Daniel would hear me yelling at Michael. It had been my plan so he would leave the room, and we could really talk without my baby's ears catching anything that would likely get him slaughtered.

I could hear Michael saying, "Excuse us. She's just a little frantic because her plane ride didn't go as planned." My eyes rolled at his terrible lie. I heard shuffling, and a door close before Michael breathed a word.

"Nikita, I'm not gonna hurt him! Calm down."

"You didn't answer me… What. Are. You. Doing. There?" I enunciated each word, so he would understand just how much of a mistake he's making by going to our home.

"I just wanted to come and see you, okay?" My heart went out to the man who, unintentionally, still held a piece of me that Daniel would never get to behold. My TRUE love. "Michael," even though I loved Michael, now more than ever, I needed to stay on the safe side of things so my heart won't take a beating again. "you can't just drop by my house, and impose on everything. I realize we haven't talked in a while but you know I'm in Morocco, and going to my house was totally inappropriate. You need to leave." My iniquity words were only driven by my need to protect myself from further conflict in my life. I didn't want to make him feel bad, but I needed to stop whatever it was that made me look at him with so much love. His smile could lighten my day. His touch could send chills down my entire body. His kiss could make my smile spread across my entire face, and I just wish being together was a possibility, but it would only dispel the already built up problems in my life. Why isn't Michael as avoidable as a four leaf clover? Why can't we repel like the positive sides of magnets? Why was he the only person who, when no one else would, could make me forget about Division and my horrendous crimes?

Flashback:

"Michael, where are you taking me?" Michael had blind folded me, and told me he was taking me someplace special. "Just wait… We're almost there." As he led me to a place unknown, I began to hear children's screams, and laughs. I could also see a celestial glow was blinding; it seemed like Christmas lights, even though it was only October.

"We're here!" I heard him say, as he stroked my face before gently removing my blindfold. My eyes lit up as I figured out what was in front of me. We were at the fair.

One day when I gave Michael a glimpse of my horrific childhood, he asked me if I had ever been on a roller coaster. I replied with a quick no as the pain of my formative years came flooding back. He had then told me that one day, he will show me a world with no pain… Just us and our love.

As we walked along all the tempting roller coasters, my eye caught the sight of the one coaster I'd heard about many times, but never rode.

"Which one would you like to ride, beautiful?" I stood like a ballerina, and kissed his lips, before pointing to the most romantic ride, here.

"The Ferris Wheel!" I yelped, as he slung me over his shoulder, and led me to the most classic ride in roller coaster history.

After we had waited a minute, Michael had to let me down to get onto the coaster.

When we sat down, he held my hand while I pushed each finger between his. As soon as the ride started, my grip on his hand tightened, and I let out an almost inaudible squeal, but of course Michael's ears heard it.

"Are you scared?" He asked with less worry, and more amusement. I in return, punched him in the chest and said, "No... I know you'll always protect me." We both exchanged smiles, and as I saw we were at the very top of this contraption, Michael snuck his arm around my waist and kissed my lips with all the love in the world. "I will never forget this, Michael." I again showed him my pearly whites as he pulled me in for the unspoken conversation of love.

Present Day:

"Is that what you want, Nikita?" I knew he was actually asking if I was giving up on us, but the yes or no alternatives seemed like an earthquake waiting to happen. If yes, then me and Michael would never be together. If no, I'd have to break up with Daniel, and wait for Michael for Lord knows how long. I had to pick the rational choice for the both of us, even though it hurt like Hell. "Michael,"

"Last call for a Nikita Mears." I glanced around til' I found one of Whitfield's men looking for me.

"Michael, I have to go. My ride's here."

"Okay, uh" Before he could finish, I had hung up and walked over to Whitfield's worker.

"I'm Nikita." He eyed me up and down, obviously pleased with my appearance.

"You are very pretty women. Come on." He grabbed my bags and led me to his car.

After an hour of traffic, and an additional 30 minutes of driving between trees, and awkward roads, we finally made it to the hotel.

As I stepped out the car, the one called Whitfield greeted me, with open arms.

"So you're the famous Nikita that Percy sent?" I gave him the best smile I could in such an awkward situation, and walked into his hug.

"The one and only." I said over his shoulder. He let go of me to see my face.

"Now Percy mentioned that you were tougher than you appeared, but he never mentioned how beautiful you are." I smiled at his compliment, as he led me to his room, while Estaban, the driver took my bags.

When we arrived in my room, Estaban dropped my bags, I tipped him a 30, and he exited my presence. "So Nikita; since we'll be spending the better half of a week together, what would you like to do? We could go to the beach, or stay in bed." He smiled while approaching me like an animal about to attack its prey.

"Actually, the beach sounds fantastic." I snuck around him quickly, retrieved my bag full of slutty bathing suits, and went into the washroom to change. As I closed the door, I heard him say, "So we're playing that game? Okay, I'll play along." Since he couldn't see me, I allowed my eyes to roll to the back of my head.

I didn't plan on getting wet, so I curled my hair, and slipped on my red one piece, that showed my stomach and my back, only linked together through a little slip that covered my belly button. I also threw on this see through, black, short dress so I wouldn't have to get looks from people.

I walked out of the bathroom to find Whitfield getting ready in a teenage boy fashion; saying things like 'she's into you, or you got this, or you're a stud Whitfield.' I choked back a laugh, and made a fake coughing sound to make my presence known.

"Oh, Nikita. You look amazing. You ready to have some fun?" I decided not to mention that I saw everything he had just did, and replied by just walking past him without even a glare, knowing he would follow me like a dog would its owner.

To stop me from smashing Whitfield's head into the steering wheel when he held my hand, I imagined it was Daniel's touch I was feeling. That didn't necessarily work since it only made me ache for another man's warm hands; Michael's. No matter how long I've been away from him, tried to distance myself, or even fall in love with someone else, I always craved his affection.

Walking along the shoreline would have been enjoyable if not for Whitfield's hand squeezing my waist. Since Percy practically sold me to this man, I was pretty much his puppet and I couldn't fight back, or say no; no matter what he asks me to do.

"Nikita, do you realize every man on this beach has stared at you as we walked past?" That seemed to happen a lot, but I'm still not used to the whole 'I'm sexy' thing. How could I? I killed dozens of people, with these hands, no one wanted me as their child, so how does one gain self-confidence after years of having people tell you 'your worthless?'

"Really? I never noticed it." I made a light joke, that thankfully he understood and he showed me an honest side of him. Usually takes a few days for people to warm up to me, but Amanda said my charm is showing more and more as time goes on so it makes sense.

He grabbed my waist, made me face him and asked, "May I?" He was asking to take off my dress and sense I was lucky I even got the chance to say no, I allowed it. He gently slid the fabric off of my shoulders and the dress dropped. He looked me up and down before throwing it behind us for his driver to catch.

As we began to walk along the shoreline, he did something that was highly unexpected. He grabbed me by my legs, and threw us both into the water. I yelled a playful, "No, No!" And we both went under.

After I had gotten what felt like gallons of seawater in my mouth, I sprung up from the water, and as I caught my breath, Whitfield took it away by kissing me. I responded by kissing back, but also doing my natural 'arms around his neck' thing. It had been the first honest thing we had shared since I'd gotten here. I had allowed him to kiss me for the better half of a minute, when I finally pulled away. For the rest of the evening, we walked hand in hand, talking until the sunset appeared.

We arrived back in the hotel, but before we could even open our room's door, he captured my lips. We burst through the door and broke almost everything in our path. He pulled my bathing suit off, as I did to him. It was nowhere near as good as me and Michael making love, but I guess love does make sex excellent.

I woke up to warm arms, and cold feet. We needed to prep for tomorrow's mission, and Whitfield needed to know what the plan was to protect him since he was the one that was being threatened. I doubt it's anything serious, but I don't want anything to go wrong tomorrow night. This ball was small, and filled with all of Whitfield's clients. It had low security, so I needed to defend him like a shield.

I started sucking on Whitfield's neck seductively and said, "Hey, it's time to get up… We need to prep for your 'big night.'" As I talked to him like a little kid, his smile moved across his whole face. "Okay, but we have to replay last night's events first, yes?" I had the urge to say no, but Percy would have my ass,so I didn't have a choice. "Oui, Oui." I spoke French, as he pulled me on top of him again for another round of dirty, grimy, disgusting sex.

"Okay, so we'll be standing here," I pointed to the blueprints of the building that the ball was being held in. "for the majority of the time. Your guards will be located here, here, and here." I pointed to three different windows, all on different side of the building. "If everyone stays at their posts, nothing should go wrong." I muttered as he still held his hand on my waist.

"Nikita, I know you were hired by Percy to do this for me, but I wanted you to know that I'm grateful that you're here; and if a bullet does come for me, I hope you will be the one to escort me to the hospital." I was very confused. U thought my duty here was to protect him, no matter what.

"Wait, so you're telling me if a bullet does come for you, you _don't_ want me to take it?"

"Now why would I want that? I only asked for you so I could have a good set of eyes. My guards aren't exactly Gogol, and I needed someone highly trained."

"What's Gogol?"

"Never mind that. Just keep your eyes peeled. I'd gratefully appreciate it." He gave my waist a tighter squeeze and let go of me completely before walking into the kitchen.

The night of the Ball, I had a braid that led into a high curly ponytail; my dress was teal, cut just 3 inches above my knees to show my legs, and it was backless. My shoes on the other hand were cute, just uncomfortable.

Whitfield wore a normal tux, with a red tie, and a pocket hanky. His eyes caught my- body and he let a smile grace his face.

"Nikita, you look exquisite, as always." I thanked him with a nod, as he escorted me to the limo.

Before we could get into the long car, I spotted a mysterious man in a black hoodie approaching us. I didn't react until I saw a pistol being pulled out of the man's pocket. I yelled, "MOVE!" Shoved Whitfield in the car, a shot rang out, and I felt an excruciating pain in my upper chest, just slightly missing my heart. The last thing I remember was seeing the armed man drop dead as Whitfield's other bodyguard took him out. Then the pain grew stronger as who I'm guessing was Whitfield tried to shake my body yelling my name, "NIKITA, NIKITA!" Even though I was in alot of pain, I seemed to bring in some poetic justice by saying, "Your welcome." Before everything went black.

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=o! As you probably already know, both Nikita, and Michael pretty much foretold the future, but didn't trust their instincts enough to act on them. Oh well. I've changed my mind and decided to make Daniel stay alive a little longer. Next chapter, Noel's back, and Birkhoff's character will become a regular friend of Nikita's.


	14. Epiphany

So sorry for not updating in a while… With finals, and all this shopping with my friends and family, I'm swamped. I've also recently been in a car accident, so I'm writing from the Hospital. I'll be fine, but out of boredom I've written this chapter, so enjoy!

Epiphany

"Michael, wait! Calm down." Michael would not stop running amuck like he had no self-control whatsoever. I couldn't let the boss see him like this, or he would start asking questions that would lead to realizations about his feelings towards a certain agent. "Where is she?! Give me a visual on her NOW!"

"Michael, she's on her way here on our finest and fastest private jet. She'll be here in a matter of seconds, so calm down. Percy cannot see how much you care about her."

"I don't care. If she dies, what's the point of living here, in this miserable world? I need her…. I NEED her, and she doesn't even know it." He shed a tear that made me feel like I could never feel happiness again. I could definitely feel the angst radiating off his body. He quickly turned away, and headed for the doors Nikita would be arriving in.

Michael's POV:

It's crazy to think that a few hours ago I was just sleeping soundly in my bed, and then _BAM_ out of the blue, I get a call telling me that Nikita, the most important women in my heart, had just been shot on her 'all so harmless mission.' I can't even begin to express the pain that I feel in my chest. She was supposed to be his bodyguard as a plan B, but who knew someone was actually trying to kill Whitfield? Who knew she would risk her all so valuable life for his? Who knew that this would happen? Who knew I could feel this much pain? Before I could mentally commit suicide a _'DINGING' _noise shot me out of my trance.

I ran up to her and shoved all the doctors away so I could see her for just a second. Her face, so pale. Her skin, so clammy. Her pulse… PLUMMETING. "Her pulse.. I can't feel her pulse… I CAN'T FEEL HER PULSE! COME ON NIKKI, DON'T LEAVE ME!" I began to shed tears in front of every single doctor Division withheld. They all backed away (for some reason) as I gave her mouth to mouth, and pumped her chest like there was no tomorrow; but in this case, there may not be a tomorrow if she doesn't survive. I'm an empty ghost without her.

_'BLOW' _

_'PUMP, PUMP, PUMP'_

_'BLOW'_

_'PUMP, PUMP, PUMP'_

_'LISTEN' _

"THERE'S NO PULSE! NIKITA, PLEASE I LOVE YOU! I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER, JUST PLEASE, DON'T LEAVE ME, BABY. DON'T LEAVE ME!"

'_BLOW'_

_'PUMP, PUMP, PUMP'_

She coughed up a few ounces of blood, and opened her beautiful, brown eyes, and whispered, "Michael?"

"Nikita, Nikki we're gonna get you some help okay, just stay with me." My tone had immediately changed into a gentler one, as the doctors began to move her to medical rapidly. The doctors kept telling me to let go of her hand, but to Hell with them. I had almost lost her just a few seconds ago; I wasn't letting her out of my sight. I held onto her hand until they led her into a room for surgery. She looked up at me just as I released her hand, and a stray tear fell from her eyes. I couldn't help but let some of my tears be released as well. She reached for me like she wouldn't survive without my touch.

"Michael…" She whispered her last words, before fading into unconsciousness yet again.

Each second without her felt like an eternity. I could mentally hear a clock ticking like a damn bomb ready to explode any second. _Tick, Tock, Tick Tock. _With each passing moment, I found it harder to breathe. I was panicking at the thought of losing her. My pacing became faster, my anger building, my anxiety building, my pain building, my déjà vu becoming greater. I can't lose her. I won't be able to live without her. I'm dead without her. The thought of not hearing her laugh, seeing her smile, embracing her, kissing her, comforting her, holding her, and just being with her was killing me. At this moment, the only thing that would make me happy is to see her smile.

Flashback:

Me and Nikita had been lying in bed for a good 2 hours. She was never one to spend the day not being active, so she tried to get me to take her somewhere.

"Babe, not that I'm not enjoying the feel of your arms around me," she snuggled closer to me, "but we need to get up. It's been an hour and… 53 minutes." She looked at her clock and giggled at how much time could pass when your spending time with someone you love. "Come on, Nikita. You know you're enjoying this." Pulling her tighter to my chest, I kissed her cheek and began to suck on her neck. She started moaning and grabbed my head and pulled me closer to her neck. "Oh god, Michael." I started to suck harder on her neck, when we were interrupted by her phone ringing. She pushed me away, and muttered. "Saved by the bell." I grunted, and before she could fully remove herself from the bed, I scrambled over to her, and yanked her underneath me. "MICHAEL!" She didn't look scared though; in fact she was amused. "Ignore it. You'll… Call… Back…. Later." I kissed each side of her cheek in-between pauses, and captured her lips. She was moaning as I made my way down to her neck yet again to resume sucking where I had just sucked. I began to suck aggressively, and soon she had a purple mark on her neck, and I realized I had hurt her. I immediately pulled away and got off of the bed; looking down to the ground to avoid her eyes.

I heard the bed move, as she got off it and made her way towards me. When she was close enough to see my eyes, I backed away further. "Michael..." I cut her off before she could finish whatever excuse as to why she wasn't hurt when I knew she would be lying. "I hurt you... I hurt you…" I looked into her eyes, and finally saw all the faith she had in me. I will only destroy her trust if I stay. "I need to go." She stepped in front of me before I could take another step. "Michael, I'm not hurt. You could never hurt me. I love you, and if I want you to make love to me, you damn well will. Now get your ass on that bed, and do that again." I raised an eyebrow at her sudden bad-assness. She didn't notice how much her attitude had just turned me on, but if she wants it hard, her wish is my command` Before she could make her way to the bed, I growled like a tiger and tackled her onto the bed. She laughed, as I began to kiss her. From her mouth, to her neck, and we began to undress each other.

We spent the rest of the day making love, eating, and continuing the cycle for the best day ever.

Present:

After 2 hours of waiting for her, staring at the door she had left through, Dr. Johnson returned with her status report.

"Michael," My anxiety got the best of me, and I hopped up and hurriedly asked him the only thing that remained in my mind while sitting. "Can I see her?"

"Division doesn't allow relationships, so why are you two romantically involved?" What the hell? Was he seriously trying to manipulate me right now? Before I could threaten him, or kill him altogether, Amanda appeared and handled everything. "Michael, go and see her. I'll handle this." She didn't have to tell me twice. I busted through the doors, and quickly reassessed my demeanor so as to not take my anger out on the source of my worry.

When my eyes landed on her slim figure with tubes everywhere, and Dr. Alice still assessing her, I found my heart beating faster again, as I began to breathe slower with my adrenaline pumping even faster than it already was. "Oh Michael," Alice approached me, and told me of Nikita's condition.

"How is she?"

"We got the bullet out, and she's recovering remarkably fast. She's going to be okay." I let out my breathe that I hadn't realized I'd been holding, and walked over to Nikita's side when I saw her slightly move.

"Michael, is that you?" I smiled and grabbed a chair, to sit next to Nikita. I took her hand in mine, and kissed her while another tear escaped my eyes. I looked behind me to dismiss the doctor before I could fully speak to Nikita. "Yeah, baby it's me." She grunted as she began to sit up slightly, and focus her eyes. As she looked into my eyes, she let out a humorous sigh, and gave me a faint smile. "You're blaming yourself aren't you?" It amazes me how she can tell what I'm thinking before I tell her. "I should've been there for you." I released her hand and looked down at both of mine, closed into fists. "I'm the reason you're here, I'm the reason you got shot, and I'm the reason you almost… I almost lost you, Nikita. You know I cannot lose another person that I love." She began to cry silent tears, and I let yet another tear fall from my eyes as well. "Michael, none of this is your fault. Like I've told you many times before, I will choose to be with you. I will choose to love you. I will choose to follow you wherever you go because we're in this together. You are a huge part of my life, and I can't imagine it without you."

I couldn't take it anymore. I stood up from my chair, and leaned down to kiss her all too tempting lips. She opened her mouth, to allow my tongue to be joined with hers. I kissed her out of love, out of protection, out of pain. I wanted her to feel the warmth I felt whenever we were together. I needed her to feel my love, because if she would have died today, she may not have known how much of a life changer she's been to me. I put my hand on her cheek, and hers landed on my cheek as well. It started to become unbearable not feeling her skin against mine, and again she knew what I was thinking, and pulled my tie down, directing me to lie next to her. As I was about to take her shirt off, she had hissed in pain. As if on cue, I jumped away from her off the bed; standing far from her.

"Michael, come back." I couldn't continue hurting her, so I tried to keep my eyes away from her. "I can't hurt you anymore… I need to go." I started taking steps towards the door when her voice stopped me. "NO! Michael, stop doing this to me, to yourself… To us. How many times do I have to tell you, you could never hurt me? Not ever. You keep me alive, and going. I love you so much, Michael. I want you, Michael." Her tone got 10 times softer. "I need you, Michael."

I felt my heart warm up to her kind words, and I slowly advanced towards her bed and lie down next to her very softly, and just stared into her eyes. "Stop running away from me. It's a waste of your energy because I'm never letting you go." We both smiled, as our faces were not even an inch apart, and I pecked her lips and couldn't stop. I kissed her for all the things she unknowingly has done for me. We were interrupted by Amanda, with a disgusted look on her face. "Michael, do you even have any idea what you have just caused?"

Nikita instantly tensed up, so I took her hand in mine, and gave her a reassuring smile. "Amanda, what are you talking about?" I was genuinely confused so she started to retry, in a better approach. "Every single one of these doctors in here knows about your relationship. You've not been careful, and now I have to manipulate each one into secrecy. That won't last long either. When they realize they have abundance over us, they'll tell Percy and we'll all be dead."

Oh my god! What have I done? I was about to panic again, but a tiny warm hand squeezing mine distracted me. I looked over and saw Nikita giving me a loving smile. "Ugh, if you too screw this up for me, Percy will be the least of your problems!" She turned her heal, and stormed out the door.

Nikita began to speak, "It's okay… We'll get through this... Don't we always?" I let a smile grace my lips. And she began caressing my face. She moved my chin upward so that I was looking at her.

"What did you say that would reveal our relationship?" I was about to change the subject so that she wouldn't get mad at my carelessness, but I wanted her to know what I'd said. "Did you know that for almost a minute you had… died?" I took a breath trying not to think about her not being alive. She shook her head in disbelief. I don't think anyone told her that for a few seconds, she was lifeless. "It was the longest 43 seconds of my life. I thought I'd lost you." I moved closer to her and Eskimo kissed her for a minute or so. "I don't ever wanna feel that way ever again." Then that beautiful smile of hers appeared; the one that I'd been waiting for all day. "You won't lose me, Michael. Ever." We stayed like that for a minute longer before I had to break the silence. "If I remember correctly, I gave you mouth to mouth, your pulse was gone, and I kept yelling your name saying I loved you and I needed you. They all backed away from you, and let me do my thing. You woke up, and whispered my name, and I held you hand til we arrived at the operating room. I waited for a looong 2 hours, and here we are." She looked at me funny for a very long time. "What?"

"I love you. So much, and even though it was careless, I think if you were dying I'd do the exact same thing." While smiling, I captured her lips, and began to caress her tender stomach. When oxygen was essential, I pulled away, and stood off the bed. "I have to go... Before even more questions are asked. Okay?" She made an infantile pouty face, and said. "Okay. I understand." I leant down, and kissed her lips again making me want her even more, and told her, "I love you too, baby." I smiled at her one more time before transforming into my statuesque form, and exiting the room.

Nikita's POV:

Michael was yet again confusing things, but at the moment I could care less. I needed him, and no one else. I loved him, more and more each time he would say those beautiful 3 little words. I also loved Daniel. Oh shit! Daniel probably thinks I'm dead or something. I retrieved my phone in a hysterical way as if me calling two seconds later would change everything. _Beep…. Beep…. Beep…. _Damn it he's not answering. _Leave a message after the beep… BEEP. _"Daniel, I'm just calling to let you know I'm okay, and I'll be coming home soon. I love you. Call me back when you get this message. _Click._

After I called him, I started panicking. I have no idea why, but I needed to get home. Immediately!

I quickly checked myself out of medical, and made my way to Michael's office.

I knocked on the door once before letting myself in. "Michael, I'm heading home." I was about to exit, when his hand holding my wrist stopped me. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know, but I have a bad feeling… like something's about to happen, or did happen... I need to get home." He looked worried but also sad that I still cared about Daniel. I do love Daniel, but selfishly if I could be with Michael, I'd leave Daniel in a heartbeat.

"Wait... I'm coming with you." I shook my head, but he was stubborn. "You're not even close to full recovery, and if anyone can protect you, it's me." I gazed into his eyes for a few more seconds before grabbing his hand and leading him to the car.

While we were driving, Michael kept staring at me from the corner of his eyes. He wasn't very slick so when his hand slowly slid next to mine, I saw it within seconds. I slid mine even closer to his, and took it in my hand. I know it's wrong to love two men at the same time, but what can I do? I'm hurting Daniel by staying with him, when he deserves better. I'm stringing Michael along by acting like this relationship will work when we want two completely different things. I need to choose one of them. If it's meant to be, it can only be good, right?

I got out my key, and unlocked the door, and with a _click _we entered my house. It looked normal, like he'd been here only moments ago. The T.V was on, and hot coffee was on the table. As I looked around, there was a knife lying on the ground and as if on cue, Michael's hand was covering my mouth. He shoved us both against the wall, and he let go of my mouth. He whispered 'stay here' in an almost inaudible tone, and moved around the house with his gun pointed. His eyes landed on something that made him gasp. I walked up to him, but he tried to stop me by pushing me against the wall. Shit, that hurt my wound. I pushed him away from me, the best I could and looked where he was looking.

My heart immediately sped up in an almost inhumane way. I whispered, "Daniel?" As my eyes began to water uncontrollably. I rushed to his side, and put my finger up to his neck, hysterically. When I felt no pulse, I broke down into sobs. "Nooo! Please Daniel, baby come back to me!" I started punching his chest frantically, and muttering, 'no, no, no, no.' it felt like I couldn't breathe. He was gone… Yet another person was leaving me this year. We were supposed to get married. We were supposed to be together forever. I was supposed to get us out of Divisions reach, but now I realize I practically killed Daniel myself. All he ever did was love me. Is this his punishment for loving me, for being with me, for proposing to me? I felt Michael's hands on both sides of my body, so I turned around, and flung myself at him. My head was against his chest, still sobbing, and I clutched his shirt, like it were my oxygen. He held me against his chest, rubbing my back, and arms.

I held Daniel's hand, as the authorities took his body, and tried to take me into questioning. Just as I was about to leave with the amateur policemen, Michael showed up dressed like an FBI agent, and told the cop they were taking me in for investigation.

He didn't handcuff me, but he escorted me roughly to play the part more realistically. When we got into the van, I again broke down, in Michael's arms. He kept shushing me and saying everything would be alright, but everything would not be alright. "Why do I keep losing everyone?" He was now caressing my hair, and kissing my forehead with his eyes closed, trying to take my pain away, but no one could. The damage is done, and now I have no one. "Hey, I'm still here… I am here…. I will never leave you." I kept crying, but his words did make me feel a little better. I was about to just go through this with grief until I listened to the song that was on. It was a Michael Jackson song, and he kept muttering, 'All I'm tryna' say it that, they don't really care about us.' Michael Jackson was absolutely right. It hit me like an epiphany. Percy could care less if I died. Amanda could care less if I died. I know Michael cares, but he's not the boss. If I died on a mission, my life would have been worthless. I refuse to risk my ass for Percy. They killed my best friend, and my future husband, and I will avenge their deaths! I have too. They were both killed because of me, and I won't make it for nothing.

Michael let me go, and I acted as if I were feeling a little better, but that just showed how good an actor I was. I'm getting out of Division, and I will tear this place apart; even if I die doing it.

When we got to Division, Percy told me to go to Amanda, and she told me stuff like, 'we will find out who did this, and I'm so sorry Nikita', but it was all bullshit. She knew exactly who did this, and why. Michael didn't know though. If he did, he would've definitely told me.

I was heading to my recruit room to call it a night, when Noel was standing outside of my room. "Nikita! Oh my gosh are you okay?" He walked up to me, and enveloped me in his arms. I nodded, and in all honesty I was feeling a little better since I had a plan. I wasn't going to be staying here for much longer. "Yeah, I'm okay." He pulled away to look into my eyes, to see if I were lying, and the weird thing is, he knew I was. "I didn't know Daniel, but I am truly sorry." At the mention of his name, I began to cry again. He was surprised by my tears because he's only seen me cry once, so he led me into my room so no one else could see.

As I forced myself to be strong, a huge weight was placed on my chest. All my pain was being bottled up, but I didn't care. I needed to be strong if I was going to go up against Division.

We began talking about everything that was bothering us, when I finally told him what I was worried about. "This place has killed two people I love... I am getting my revenge." He was very confused about what I was saying. "Nikita, what are you saying?"

"I'm leaving Division. I can't allow this to keep happening, and honestly I can't take any more heartache caused by that son of a Bitch, Percy." He looked confused at first, but then he started to get a little happy, which was confusing me. "What?"

"If you're leaving Division, then I am too."

"Really?"

"Yeah... Why not?"

"Well, you do realize that we'll constantly be hunted, and in danger right?"

"Yes Nikki I understand. You are my best friend in here, and Michael doesn't like me much, so what kind of future could I have if I stayed?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. If you leave Division I'm coming with you… Deal?"

He held his hand out for me to shake, and after all I had nothing to lose, so I took his hand and shook it, before muttering, "Deal."

* * *

SO now Noel is going on the run with Nikita... Next chapter will be talking about Noel's past, getting Nikita's contacts to do her favors, and possibly their escape... You'll just have to wait and see.


	15. Mistletoe

Merry Christmas, readers! I promised a Christmas themed chapter, so here it goes.

Mistletoe

Noel and I have been having so much fun. Who knew that planning to escape Division's clutches was this interesting, and time consuming.

"Nikita, how did you get into Division?" In a matter of seconds, my mood became serious.

"I won't give you all the details, but I killed a Division agent, and I guess they thought if I could kill an agent without training, I could kill even better with."

"Wow, that's absolutely nothing like my story." I'm not nosy, but I was curious about his past. If we're going to be on the run, our specters might come back to haunt us, so I needed to know. "How did YOU get into Division? I mean none of us in there are saints, but you seem like you were a very good person before this all happened." It was now his turn to become serious.

"I was born in London. I hide my accent unless I'm trying to charm someone on a mission." He began to talk with his accent, as to show me how he truly talks. "I had 3 sisters, and 2 brothers." He began to get a bit teary eyed, so I held his hand to give him my full support, and strength. "We were not the wealthiest of families. My father abandoned us, and my mother had to prostitute herself to get money, and of course we were living paycheck to paycheck…. One day, some guy had beat, and… and raped her… My brothers knew the guy, so they went to go, I don't know get their revenge or something… They didn't come back that night, and the next day on the news, they're they were. Lifeless, being carried to the Hospital's morgue." His strength was faltering, so I wrapped my arms around his torso, and let him break in my arms. I whispered soothing things into his ear like, 'Shhhh it's okay... We do not have to talk if you're not ready.' When he was feeling better, he pulled away, and insisted on finishing his story.

"My mother fell to pieces… She started taking anything, from anybody, to ease her pain."

"What was it called?"

"Mushrooms, I think. I was 20 and at work trying to keep my sisters from starving to death, but I did not know my mother had taken that particular drug. When I got home police, paramedics, firemen; every psychologist in London was there. They told me, my mother had drowned my sisters in the lake, nearby our house. I was about to run to that lake, but a policemen had a body bag, with my sister Jennifer in it. I uncovered her face and began to ball my eyes out at the sight of my blue faced baby sister..." He took his hand in mine for a feeling of security. "I moved to America to get away from the craziness that is my family, but of course a new country cannot erase your wrongdoings; after a while, the grief was driving me into insanity, so I turned to drugs myself… After a while I took whatever was given to me, until." His face lit up, in a monstrous way.

"Until?"

"Until I was given mushrooms. It brought back terrible memories, so I tried to stop doing drugs… It is extremely hard to do when you owe people money, and have no home, so of course, someone came for me… I had been in an ally and they had attacked me. It was 2 of them, and they had guns. I was coming down from my high, and I was a little out of it, but somehow I managed to kill them."

I made an astonished face, and he finished his story. "I went to prison, I saw Michael once, and he picked me to be a Division agent I guess. I'd been here for a few months before you showed up." He smiled towards me, and gave my hand an even tighter squeeze. "Now we're plotting to take revenge against the agency that made us kill people, yes?" His questioning smirk was held until I replied. "Yes."

After Noel left, I went behind my bookcase, and found my secret hiding spot. It was a very tiny opening behind it that you had to shove backwards with a hanger to reveal a yellow folder full of my most private possessions.

I looked through the folder until I found what I'd been looking for.

Flashback:

My chest hurt soo bad! Just before I had faded into the blackness, Whitfield slipped a piece of paper into my pocket. "I owe you big time for this… If you ever need anything, call this number, ok? When you call say it's... Uh Monica Berry." His men were running past me with guns blazing. "Ok." I muttered the best I could. He was ripping a piece of his shirt, trying to put pressure on my wound as I passed out, fading into unconsciousness.

Present:

In my hand was Whitfield's number. I grabbed my phone and went secure before dialing the number.

_Beep_

_Beep_

_Beep_

"Hello?"

"Monica Berry here." I heard a sharp gasp before he began talking again.

"Nikita, is that you?"

"The one and only."

"Are you on a secure line?"

"Of course."

"Okay, well since your calling, I'm guessing you need a favor."

"Man your smart! Can we meet somewhere?"

"Yeah, that'll be fine. Well instead of meeting somewhere, why don't I just have my guy bring you here."

"Yeah that'd be fine. Here let me give you my address."

"Oh, well I kind of already know where you live." I'm sure the confusion that had risen was well known by him.

"How do you know...?" I stopped talking as I felt a little crumb like object in the middle of his card. "How did- wait, you use your business card to track people?"

He laughed at my fascination/disappointment. "Hey they're a very useful tool when trying to kill my enemies plus they all have trackers, so it's nothing against you; it's kind of weird but I already trust you… Not very many of Percy's spies are genuinely kind."

"Yeah that's true… But about that, are you Percy's best friend or something?" I needed to know if I was basically digging my own grave talking to Percy's friend.

"Nikita, I don't know how to tell you this, but the person who shot you, yeah that was another one of Percy's agents." Well this is a shocker... Not! Percy always has a trick up his sleeve, but I don't understand why he'd do this.  
"Why?"

"He knows I'm currently trying to cut my ties with him and everyone with high power and just be a dealer. That's the only reason we were throwing the damn ball anyways."

"Yeah, but if Percy wants you dead, you'd already be dead so what is he waiting for?"

"Probably my latest project... Its top secret, sorry to disappoint."

"It's cool, I'm not interested."

"Well my man just reported back, and said he's outside your apartment. I'll see you in a minute." He hung up, as I grabbed my jacket, and headed out the door, to the car.

When we arrived, I was greeted with a huge abandoned mansion, and about 15 guards making sure I didn't have anything that would harm Whitfield. I was basically getting raped. They touched my stomach, my ass, my boobs, but when one of them touched my womanhood a little longer than necessary, I elbowed him as hard as I could in the face. The remaining 14 guards pointed their guns at me, just as Whitfield walked in. "Men, put your guns down. If not for this women, you'd all be unemployed and probably deported back to all your countries." He chuckled at his last remark, as the guards lowered their guns hesitantly. "Whitfield."

"Nikita.. Shall we?" He held his arm out for me, and I graciously took it.

When we reached what I'm guessing was his office, he offered me a bottle of scotch.

"Oh Whitfield, now in our line of work you know it's your own death if you drink what's offered to you. I'm far from stupid."

He laughed at my cleverness. "Just seeing if I'm dealing with a smart spy or not. I wouldn't have let you drink it." I made a 'yeah right' face before beginning talking about what I needed.

"Okay well we're not here to talk about my spy skills. I need a few favors."

"Fair enough. You did save my life." He took a seat behind his desk, and offered me one across from him. I gave him a grateful smile, and took the seat.

"How's your arm by the way?" He pointed to my arm, in a sling.

"I completely forgot it was still on. I heal quickly. It's almost good as new."

"Okay... Now let us get to business shall we?"

"Yeah, so as you probably figured out, I'm planning on escaping Division."

When his face became confused, I realized maybe he didn't know that. "You're planning on escaping Division?"

"Yes."

"OK Nikita, but you should know if you leave they will never stop hunting you. You'll be hiding for the rest of your life."

"I know. But I am not hiding. I AM going to tear that place down." If possible his face became even more confused.

"_You're _gonna try and take them _down_?"

"Yes Whitfield. You don't need to know the reasoning but I have to do this; for the good of everybody... Even if I die doing this, I will finish this fight." He just shook his head in disbelief, as I rolled my eyes in annoyance.

"Okay… So what do you need from me?"

'FINALLY!' I wanted to say but I bit my tongue and instead said,

"Okay, so first I need a place to stay."

"That can easily be arranged, next." Wow he's good.

"I need someone who can take out my tracker."

"Okay shady doctor. Very easy... Next."

"I need guns, gear, all types of explosives. I know you deal."

"That won't be a problem, but I stopped dealing after you got shot. I do have a guy though. He was my biggest competition, and also my best friend... Here's his number." he began writing on a piece of paper, "When he answers, ask for Kami Joe." I let a chuckle escape my mouth at the thought of his girlie codename.

"Kami J-"

"Don't ask… What else?"

"Uh I need contacts... A lot. You're my only one because I saved your life, but I can't save everybody so I need friends. Loyal friends."

"Done and Done... Is that all?"

"No... I need money."

"I have a guy who makes fake money."

"Okay. Last thing I need is the location... Of a girl."

"Name?"

"Alexandra Udinav."

"Alexandra Udin-"

"No more questions."

"Okay... Is that all you need?"

"Yes."

"Well I can have this all for you in about a week. It would be quicker but we have to go house shopping."

"Wow, okay. When can we go?"

"Well, all my contacts have been listening to this whole conversation, so they are working right now. I'm free now, how about you?" Wow. Being a dealer has its privileges… I wonder how many contacts he has.

"Yeah my calendar's clear."

"Okay. Well I have a catalog is right here. Come see." I hopped out of my chair, and made my way towards him.

"Okay these are the ones in Jersey." He was scrolling through them quickly giving information on each one. He was passing one saying 'it was not his best work' but on the contrary, I quite liked it. "Wait, go back." He looked at me to see if I was serious and did what he was told. "You like this?" A smile explored my face as I looked at the beautiful loft. "I love it! Why is it not your best work?"

"Too many windows,"

"I like windows."

"Not very well working water,"

"I can buy a tap."

"It's extremely spacious,"

"I like my houses spacy."

"Nikita, why do you want this?"

"It's just, light is all. It's the perfect home for a gal like me."

"Are you serious, you want this?" As if my answer would save the world, I replied with enthusiasm, "Yes!"

With it now being Christmas Eve, I felt a little lonely. Christmas had been a terrible holiday ever since my foster mom died.

Flashback:

Alexis (my foster sister) had just went to her room to spend her Christmas alone, without being pushed around by Gary, and just as I was about to head to my room, I was stopped by the fat bastard himself. "Nikita, when are you gonna get a job, huh? You're foster mother, Angela would have been very disappointed in you." I could smell the vodka in his breath, practically oozing from his nose.

"Gary, shut up. I'm only 12, and its Christmas. You don't have to get us anything, but you do have to leave me the hell alone... Now get out of my way." I tried to breeze past him, but he grabbed me by my arms, and pushed me into the wall, making our pretty paintings fall.

"Do NOT talk to me like that little girl! I am the boss of you, and if I say to do something, you do it!" I tried to maneuver myself out of his arms, but he was much too strong for me. My frustration was building, and as soon as my adrenaline kicked in, I spit in his face. He let go of me long enough for me to make a run for it.

Alexis had ran out of her room, to see what was happening, but instead of putting us both in danger by running in the room and locking the door behind me, I pushed her in the room, told her, "Hey, Lexis. Lock the door, and don't come out, okay.. Everything's gonna be fine... Here." I handed her the I-pod that was in my pocket from years ago, and made her listen to music, loudly. "Are you gonna be okay, sissy?"

"Yeah Lexis, I'll be fine...I just need you to do this okay?" I gave her an extremely fake smile that she hadn't noticed.

"Okay." I closed the door, and prepared myself for a beating I wouldn't soon forget. Gary had caught up with me just as the door closed, and grabbed me by my hair, dragging me into his room. I tried to scratch his hands so he'd let go, but he did no such thing. When we made it to the door, he quickly opened it with a loud _bang, _and threw me against the mirror against the wall. The mirror that I slammed against fell, and shattered into a million pieces. When Gary walked back up to me, he pushed me down harder, so the glass was now penetrated into my skin.

My arms were now pleading, but he wasn't done with me yet. He picked me up, and started punching, and slapping me. I was now shedding tears, and screaming, but no one would help me because in this world we live in, being a foster kid means every man for himself. Even when I was 5, I had no one to help me, no one to protect me, no one to love me, and now no one to avenge me. I wasn't gonna let this one go. From this day forward, as he was beating the crap out of me, I vowed to get my revenge.. Someday, somehow he will get what he deserves!

Present:

It was now 9:30 pm, on Christmas Eve, and I was extremely lonely. The silence sauntering around my apartment was so loud, I could only hear my rhythmic breathing like a damn time bomb. Most kids would probably be waiting for Santa, or just couldn't sleep, but as for me I was just lonely. It was to the point where I was practically having full-fledged conversations with myself.

_Knock, Knock, Knock_

Who the hell could be at my door right now? Ah, who cares, I'm extremely withdrawn.. If it were a mouse, I'd open the door.

"Who is it?" I've learned not to open the door to people in the middle of the night; especially considering I am a spy. People would probably pay to see my ashes.

"Michael.. Open up." Oh thank God! Now I can spend time with him. I quickly opened the door, and wrapped my arms around him. "I've missed you." I said over his shoulder. "I missed you too." He reluctantly returned my embrace, and closed his eyes enjoying the feel of my arms around him. I smiled at the fact that my warmth could bring him such mitigation.

After our little moment at the door, I led him into the house, and took his coat off for him, and hung it in my closet. I made my way towards him in the Kitchen. "Would you like something to eat, drink?"

"Uh, no I'm good."

"So, what brings you here at this time of night, Michael?" His facial expression practically said, 'are you an idiot.' I almost laughed.

"What? I thought you'd realized I came here to see you." His eyes became a little sad, which confused me a bit. "What's wrong Michael?" I walked towards him until we were face to face, and I was stoking his scruff lightly. "This is my first Christmas with you, and my second without… them." Of course, how could I not have remembered? Michael's family had died, and he needs someone to spend his holidays with. "Oh… I'm sorry… I completely forgot…" I advanced even closer to him, so our noses were brushing against each other, romantically, and we were looking into each other's souls. "If you'll allow me, I would love to spend my Christmas with you." He muttered, as he again became happy.

I gave him an almost unnoticeable smile, and rubbed his face harder. "Of course, but I don't know how to do this Christmassy stuff. As you know I was a foster kid, so I have no idea what to do this time of year.. I usually don't do anything." He gave me an 'awe' smile, and kissed my nose. "It's okay, baby. I'm willing to teach you." My smile, made him smile, as I took his face in my hands and kissed him with my lips, fuller than ever.

"Nikita, how do you not know how to make hot chocolate?"

"Michael, I didn't know how to turn on the damn stove, of course I was clueless about the chocolate." He chuckled at my slightly spoken joke.

We had been attempting to make hot chocolate and cookies to better enjoy the night. I was supposed to do the hot chocolate and Michael, the cookies. It didn't work out due to my cluelessness, but Michael knows his way around the Kitchen, so it'll all work out eventually.

"Here babe," he had come up behind me, pressing hid chest against my whole back, guiding my fingers to the controls. "Now use this button to start the stirrer, and-" I had begun to start the automatic stirrer, but I guess I wasn't supposed to do that yet because it had caused the chocolate mix to splatter everywhere. On the couches, the walls, the fridge. I was close to tears when an inaudible chuckle escaped Michael's mouth. I busted out laughing, covering my face with Michael's chest, and he hugged me to it as he continued laughing.

When he was able to catch his breath, he resumed speaking. "Nikki you weren't supposed to start it yet… I wasn't done explaining the instructions."

"I didn't know that at the time…" I said, as my lunges began to consume heavy breathes of fresh air.

"Obviously." I punched him in the chest as hard/light as I could, and began to walk out of his embrace, but when he pulled me back into his chest, I couldn't help the laugh that had escaped my lips.

He had chocolate all over his face, and since I was the one who initiated the mess, I'm guessing my face was covered with the chocolaty mess, too.

He began to lightly wipe it away with his hands, but when he glanced at my lips (which I'm guessing also had chocolate on them) he just kissed me, like he had to get it off my lips in that manner. He licked more than kissed, but hey, I wasn't complaining. He slowly lifted me upon the countertop and began grinding in between my legs, almost unnoticeably. I pulled away at the thought of Daniel, and gave Michael a lousy excuse. "I need a shower." I jumped off the counter top quickly, heading for the shower, but not before getting a tiny glimpse of the look on his face. It was an understanding, but at the same time hurt look. I felt worst knowing I was the cause of his current pain, but I guess I couldn't feel too bad for him, or Daniel's death would've been unimportant, and God it was so I needed to stop my teenage like hormones from getting the best of me.

After my shower, I was surprised to see Michael sitting on the couch facing the door, waiting for me. "Hey, uh I think we need to talk." I really hope he doesn't bring up my slight hiccup. My wet hair bounced a bit as I made my way towards Michael. "Michael, you don't need to bring up the huge elephant in the room. If you're gonna say what I think it is that you're talking about, we have an understanding, ok?" It always seems to amaze him that I can read him like a child's book. "Ok.. So since the cookies idea is out of the picture, what do you wanna do?"

"I have a fantastic idea."

"Nikki, if you can't even make some damn hot chocolate, what makes you think you can put up a tree?"

"I may be very brain dead when it comes to the kitchen, but décor is my area of expertise." He smiled at me, pecked my lips, and held my hand as we walked through the store looking for ornaments for the tree. We picked blue, gold, and silver. A special ornament that pulled me in was a blue ornament of a ballerina. I remember all of my female classmates being in dance, while I just dreamed of being one.

"Nikki?"

"Hmm?"  
"Oh nothing, just seemed like you were out of it for a second." I picked up the ornament, and smiled at the thought of a better childhood for myself.

"Just a little glimpse of my old life, is all." He kissed my forehead, gave my hand a squeeze, and guided me to the cash register.

"Michael, I can't reach the star." The tree was much taller than me, and I couldn't reach to put the star at the top.

"Here, baby." He lifted me up, and I yelped before realizing he only held me on his shoulders so I could put the star on.

As soon as the star was placed perfectly, I hurriedly plugged everything in, and it lit up like Rudolph's nose. Michael had come up behind me, holding me against his chest. We were both staring at the glorious tree, and it finally hit me that this will be my very first happy Christmas, ever. "It's amazing."

"So are you." He kissed the back of my head, and I could tell he loved me with every fiber of his being. "I love you. I know you are trying to put distance between us because of, you know, but I want you to know you can never push me far enough to where I will actually leave you for good." I lifted my face so that I was looking him dead in the eyes, and kissed him with a response that said 'dido'.

In the morning, which for me was 6:00, I woke Michael, and told him, "IT'S CHRISTMAS BABY, IT'S CHRISTMAS!" He slowly woke up, and laughed at my enthusiasm.. It's weird, he'd been laughing a lot lately. "Okay, okay." He hopped out of bed, and headed for the showers, but before he could fully make it in the bathroom, I ran in front of him. "No time for that, come on baby." I grabbed his hand, and led him into the living room where the new tree stood tall, and proud.

I leaned down and grabbed the present I had gotten him. "Open it… It's for you." He smiled, and pecked my lips before opening the gift. When his eyes caught sight of what I'd known he loved, he threw the bag on the ground, and held it in his hand. "How'd you know?"

"I saw you fall in love with it when we were together, before I came to Division."

He jumped slightly before hugging me in an almost death grip, and twirled me around in complete 360's.

His gift was the new state of the art 1800 grain evolver rifle. It was too good to be true but I loved Michael too much to not buy it for him.. It was Division's money anyways. "Thanks Nikki!" He pecked my lips, and began fiddling with his pocket.

"Okay," he pulled a box out of his pocket. "Here. I know you'll love it." He delicately placed the box in my hands, and I immediately went into shock.

"Oh, don't worry, it's not a ring." Thank God! I slowly opened the box to reveal my necklace that I'd told him my mother gave to me.. It looked old and ratty before, but now it looked renewed. My eyes got teary, so I tackled Michael into a loving hug. I began kissing his whole face frantically, and could not stop. "Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God! Michael, I love it! I can't believe you did this for me.. No one's ever given me a Christmas gift, or any gift for that matter." I looked him deep in the eyes so he'd understand how much this meant to me. "I love you! God, I love you so much!" I slowly leaned down and kissed the smile that had remained on his face. When he pulled away from my lips, I layed my head on his chest. "What do you wanna do now, baby?"

"Uh can we visit somebody?" If he could see my eyes right now, he'd know exactly who I was referring to. "Anything for you, honey.. May I ask who?" I pushed myself off of him, and gave him a smart ass smirk. "Just get your ass in the shower so we can go." He smiled as he pecked my lips about to walk away. As soon as his arms left my waist, he slapped my ass and kept walking in a victorious way.

_Here lies Ilse Floor, friend, sister, daughter, and wonderful person._

_1990-2012_

I got on my knees, and sat before my best friends' grave. "Hey Ilse. I guess this will be the first time I talk to you here, in this state." Michael had also gotten down to comfort me. His arm wrapped around me, and he kissed the hair covering my ear. "I miss you soo much. I've never met anyone as kind and selfless as you, and even though someone like me doesn't deserve your friendship, I appreciate your shoulder always being there for me to cry on." I couldn't talk in past tense because she will never truly be gone. Her spirit will live with me forever. "I love you.. Merry Christmas." I grabbed the flower in my pocket, and placed it across her grave. After I kissed the gravestone, I stood up along with Michael, and started walking away, into the semi-sunset.

Me and Michael were lying in bed side by side, holding hands. We hadn't talked in a minute, and it was quite comfortable, until Michael sat up from his position and grabbed something from his drawer. I had now been sitting up, and wondering what he was doing. He turned around holding mistletoe in his hand, above our heads with a glorious smile on his face. "Mistletoe." I laughed, at his infantile ways, and leaned in, to kiss him just as the clock turned to 12:00 a.m. marking the next day, of the beginning of the end of my Division days, because even though I am extremely happy with Michael, I can never forget the people whose lives have been taken away from them because of me. Today marks the beginning of the end.. The beginning of the end.

* * *

Merry Christmas you guys! I had an amazing day with my family, and I hope you did too.. Review, because it really does keep me motivated, and makes me wanna write faster… Thanks everybody!


	16. Escape: Part 1

These are the last few chapters in season 0, I guess. :(

Escape: Part 1

Focus Nikita, focus. You're at the right place, you just need some weaponry.

"Who is it?" A hidden wooden panel opened, just enough for me to see a pair of eyes.

"A friend Of Kami Joe's." He looked back, and began speaking Dutch to a man behind him. 'Ze zegt dat ze een vriendin van Kami Joe.' Before I could even blink, the door flew open, revealing a medium-sized man, with a holstered gun.

"You were the one talking on the phone; the one asking Whitfield for contacts, and money?"

"Ja, dat ben ik." (Yes I am) He offered me a smile, before opening the door completely to let me in.

"So, how do you know Whitfield?" I turned to look him in the eyes.

"Trever, we will be doing business together a lot, and after I do.. something a lot of people will want me dead. Better not to ask to many questions." I pat him on the shoulder like a little boy.

"We should at least get properly acquainted. I'm Trevor... And you are?" He held out his hand for me to take, as he began to muster up his best smile.

"I'm Nikita." I took his hand, and we properly shook before doing a whole lot of business together.

"Nikita, where are we going?" I had Noel blindfolded, as we were walking down the empty, quiet, dark streets of Jersey.

"Just trust me okay, you're gonna love it." I opened the door, and led him up the stairs the best I could. I had already been up and down this loft a million times, so I knew exactly where everything was.

I halted when we were in the center of the loft, and took of Noel's blindfold slowly, so the suspense could build.

"Nikki, just take the damn thing off!" He said between giggles. As he took hold of my hand, we both guided the blindfold off his face.

The size of his eyes was priceless. "How'd you get a place like this?" He began to swagger his way around the open space, that still needed final touches.

"I know a guy." A cocky grin the size as texas spread across my face, as we looked around the place together. I showed him the bathroom, the kitchen, the workout area, and even showed him a map of a local swimming pool and the hours to go unnoticed.

"This is amazing... You are amazing." I did a girly hair flip to show my egotistical ways.

"Yeah I know. I really am something." Our laughter echoed through the loft, just as it began to rain outside. I quickly walked over to the window, and smiled at peacefulness when it rains. I know sometimes theirs car crashes, and people get angrier when it rains, but honestly its quite peaceful. It washes dirt away from the cement, and it makes most people more tired. It's soothing to hear the water splash everywhere like your constantly near the ocean.

"Nikki?" Noel walked silently up to me, and put his hand on my shoulder. I flinched at the sudden disturbance of my peace, but soon relaxed under his hand.

"Yeah?" I turned to look him in the eyes.

"Just looked like you checked out again... You in your own little world in there?" He knocked on my head, hinting at my absent-mindedness.

"Just having a moment.. Well we should get out of here, before someone realizes where we are." We began to walk out the door, as I forgot it was raining. Just as I locked the door behind me, Noel put his jacket over my head, blinding me from my surroundings. "NOEL! What the-"

"Just come on.. I'll get is a cab." All I heard was a whistle, probably from his mouth, and I was soon being guided into a car.

"See. I am capable of doing something." He smiled at his attempt at joking, but I needed him to know that we were partners in this.

"Noel... We need to talk about this relationship." He turned his head and looked genuinely confused at what this was leading to. Honestly that's probably the first idiotic thing he's done. He's not stupid, at all but he had to know I'd bring up the big elephant in the room.. Or in this case, the cab.

"Noel, first of all we are partners. We've been friends since I stepped in Division, and we've been honest, and caring to each other from the beginning. I appreciate you coming with me, and being here for me." I continued searching for the words to say.

"You and me are equals. I need you just as much as I'm guessing you need me. When we do this, when we run we will have to work in sync. Side by side. I'm not the leader here. We're both just as good at everything, we both have sins to make amends with, and we both have a lot to lose. We need to work together as a pair. Like the yin and yang."

"Peanut butter and jelly, huh?" I let out a slight giggle, and continued talking.

"You are my partner now, and I love you. We will be successful, and we will be successful together." He touched his chest, in mock understanding.

"You should be a speaker. You're good." Punching his chest, and giggling wasn't the outcome I expected, but with Noel, things always turn out suprising.

When I got home, I began finishing the final touches of our escape. I went to my hiding place, and got out the folder. I needed to call a doctor to get our trackers out.

" ?"

"And who might I be speaking to?" Oh nice, a British accent. Noel and him could probably bond about something now.

"A friend of Whitfield's." There was a pregnant pause before he spoke again.

"And how do I know your telling the truth?"

"Well first off, no one calls you '_doctor_' anymore because your license got revoked for reasons that we don't have to speak about. Secondly, I know where you really live." I gave him a second to let my info soak in. "See, cause you use a fake address nearby your real address, just in case the mob wants to come after you.. again." A rather devious chuckle exited his mouth, letting me know he understood I knew exactly who he was. "Now, since we both know I'm not a phony, shall we discuss business now?"

He sighed before growling, "Yes."

"We should meet somewhere... We haven't met in person, and I need to tell you what I need."

"OK.. Since you know everything about me, meet me in the Hospital's false exit..." Just as I was about to question the location, he cut me off. "Don't worry.. No one uses it. I use it as my operation room, and seeing as you know Whitfield, you know how to hack a Hospital's cameras... Wouldn't want anyone to know we were there." I nodded as if he could actually see me. "Okay. Be there tomorrow at 0900."

As the line went dead, it all began to sink in. I am getting out of Division. I am escaping the agency that made me kill for them, and my best friend is coming with me. I will have my freedom. And maybe along the way, start to forgive myself for all the wrongs I've commited.

"You go that way, I'll move this way... Go!" As I moved to the left to do a quick sweep of the place, and make sure this wasn't a setup. We met in the middle, panting.

"Okay, so this is not a setup. There's no way he could get anything lethal in this Hospital anyways." I looked down at our guns and gave Noel an 'are you serious' glare.

"Yeah, cuz it's extremely hard to sneak in guns... Like we just did." An awkward silence fell upon us, until Noel broke it with his laughter.

"Shutup, Nikki." I raised my hands in surrenderance.

"Hey I was just agreeing with you." The sarcasm in my voice was practically spewing from my ears.

"Hello?" We both pointed our guns towards the door that had just been opened, on the worst time. The man began walking closer, until he saw our guns. "Whoa, whoa, whoa... It's me. Darwin." I hesitantly lowered my gun, but didn't fully lower it until he switched a light on, showing me who he was.

"See.. It's just me, Nikita.. Tell him to lower his gun." He nodded towards Noel, who still had perfect aim Of the Doctor's face. I gently walked up to Noel, and pushed his gun downward. "It's okay. It's him." He unhooked his eyes from the doctors' to get a glimpse of my face. He loosened up, instantly and hugged me with one arm.

"Show me the implant." I began to slowly lift up my shirt, and show him where it was put. He began feeling for the mark that was left from my tracker.

"Okay, I've found it. It should'nt be hard to take out.. Now let me see yours." He directed his attention towards Noel, as I began to readjust myself.

Noel looked pissed as hell when the Doctor started feeling his hip, but he needs to get over it.. It's not like him and the Dr. were kissing.

"Okay, yours is fine too." Noel couldn't pull his underwear up quick enough.

"So, as you know, I'm free everyday, so when is the right timing for you?"

As I searched for any important dates that I wouldn't be available on, Noel, and the doctor began to talk about their England days.

"Okay, we're free everyday. Does tomorrow sound good?"

"Yeah. Be here early, okay? I wouldn't want this thing taking all day."

"Exactly how long will the procedure take?"

"Well since I have to do the both of you, about 3 hours. It would be only 2 if you didn't have to rest after."

"Okay. We'll be here at 6. Wouldn't want Percy asking questions." I raised my eyebrows at Noel, indicating that my last comment was directed towards him.

I was walking in the park, wondering how these random people take for granted how much they have, when I bumped into someone. "Oh sorry, I didn't mean to." I looked up, to see the most beautiful, familiar green eyes ever. Michael.

"Michael! What are you doing here?" I stood up straight and avoided hugging him, so I wouldn't burst out crying or something.

"I needed to see you..." He took a guilty pause and looked at the ground.

"What's wrong?"

"Well.."

"Michael, whatever it is, you can tell me. I'm here." 'for now' I muttered in my head.

"What's happening between us?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Look," he waved between me and him. "Why are you distancing yourself from me?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Look down, Nikita.. There's atleast 2 feet between us.. Why are you not hugging me, or smiling at me, or even- you know what, nevermind." Well now he was just acting like a chick.

"Are you seriously mad at me because I'm not dry humping you in the park?"

"You didn't even say you missed me... It's been 3 days, Nikita. 3 days and no phone calls, no texts, no nothing."

"Oh my goodness Michael, you are such a man! You could've called me, text me.. I'm not the only one with a damn phone."

"You know what... Why are we even talking about this, you're right. I'm not mad that we're not kissing, or showing that we love each other.. Not as mad as I am about you and Noel!" Oh shit!

"Noel?"

"Yes, Noel! You're trackers have been in the same place over 9 different times!"

"Michael, he's my friend! That's all! Even if he did try to get with me, I wouldn't. I love you." I tried to walk up to him, but he would not let me.

"Michael, don't be like that." I really needed him and me to be together my last days, but he was making it hard.

"Just answer me this one thing... What are you two doing together, hmm? You're supposed to be with me, Nikki. When you're spending every moment with him, and not me it makes me look stupid."

"Michael, our relationship is a damn secret! Who the hell would be watching?"

"I'm not saying it like that, and you know it." He took a step back, and we both took a breather before continuing this (now less) heated discussion.

"Look, all I'm saying is if you love me so much, why were you spending all your time with him and not me?" I decided not to look at him, so I settled on looking at the ground.

"Nikita, look at me... Look at me!" He lifted my chin aggressively up to meet his eyes. "Tell me the truth."

"Michael.. I... I can't." He was scanning my eyes like an ophthalmologist.

"No." He knows.. I knew he would figure it out.. Damn it!

"Michael, let me explain."

"Noo.. You can't be leaving." The denial he was going through was evident.

"You can't be doing this... No. I'm mistaken, right? I have to be mistaken." He began to pace slowly, but when his rage became demonic, he grabbed the first thing that came out of his pocket, and threw it against a tree. We were probably making a scene, but I couldn't care less right now.

"Nikita, what are you thinking!? You cannot be leaving! No one has ever left! You can't!" His brain was still going, so I decided to allow him to go through all these realizations without my company. I resided my position on a bench, and watched him overreact.

"Is that why you and-noo no no no, you and Noel? Really!?" He continued on this rampage for another 30 minutes before calming down a bit.

He slumped next to me, giving me the cold shoulder, not knowing what to say. I decided to be the first to break the silence.

"Michael, babe-"

"Don't call me that."

"No, please don't do that. It's hard enough having to leave you, but if you're mad at me too. I can't take it, Michael please." He still hadn't redirected his hurt eyes from the cement. The jaded, and heartbroken look was plastered on his face. It didn't change either. He was hurt, which honestly I'd rather him mad than hurt. It hurt me to know that I was the cause of his inner turmoil.

"Michael, please." I began to rub his arm with my hands, and kiss his arms, as a tears began to form in my eyes. I kissed up to his neck, and began to kiss his cheek. I turned his head, so he was now facing me, but he still didn't look at me. When his face was in perfect alignment of mine, I started kissing him again. This time, I pecked him lips. He didn't repel though. He actually kissed back. I began to kiss his lips frantically, like I'd never kiss him again. He kissed me back. That's all that mattered. He kissed me back. I was getting really rowled up, so I started hugging him, instead of kissing. He held me in his arms, and I could feel him trembling. He was gonna miss me just as much, huh? I had no idea he cared that much. I know he loves me, but still it always amazes me how much love a broken man can show.

He wrapped his strong arms around me, and I held his arms against me. I needed his affection, his touch, his heartbeat, his breath, his love. No one could do me like Michael. Every other guy is like rain on snow. Typical, constant, not rare. Then Michael is like a drop of blood right on top of the snow. He's completely different and unexpected. He's good. He's worth the world.

"How much longer do we have?" He asked me.

"I don't know... I think less than a week. Like 4 days." The speed if his heart beat suddenly felt like the energizer bunny.

"Baby, let's not mourn on our last days together. If anything we should live it since its our last." My hand slid up his shirt to feel his chest where his heart would be.

"Okay. I love you." His voice cracked at his last word. I knew he needed my comfort as well, so I sat up, and wrapped my arms around his chest.

"I love you too." A single tear slid down my face, but I quickly wiped it away. I needed to be strong because the only reason that as of now I'm even slightly thinking about not leaving is because of this man. He is the love of my life, and I'm not sure I can throw it all away.

"Do you have any other business to take care of?" We were now walking the trail in this beautiful park.

"Yes. Actually tomorrow morning, I have to get my tracker taken out." We were holding hands, and every time I mentioned me leaving, he'd squeeze a little harder. His palm was getting clammy, but that just might be his hands temperature.

"Can I come?" I rotated to look him in the eyes with a questioning look.

"Michael-"

"What? I won't desturb anything, I just wanna make sure you're okay. And-" He pulled me closer into his embrace. "I don't wanna be away from you. Not even for a second."

"Okay. You can come but no being mean to Noel." And now my hand was going to need a cast, due to how hard he squeezed my hand this time.

"Michael, calm down." Stroking his face seemed to be the best way, since he usually moans whenever I touch his face.

"I just don't like him, Nikita."

"Well Michael, there's no logical reason you shouldn't like him."

"I don't believe he's the best you could do, and... I know he likes you." I didn't move a muscle when those words escaped his mouth. So he did know.. No wonder he didn't like the guy.

"How'd you figure out?"

"Because, Birkhoff likes you as a friend and he doesn't spend this much time with you. Noel loves you, doesn't he?"

"I don't know Michael, but you know I would never love him back.. At least not in that way. He's just my friend, my brother, not the love of my life.. That slots already taken." I turned into his line of walking and wrapped my arms around his neck. Likewise for my hips.

"Since me and Birkhoff are meant to be together." I could feel the heat radiating off his body. I chuckled at his protectiveness/jealousy. He doesn't take jokes about me well.

"Whatever Nikki." He let go of my waist, but I did not release my grip on his neck. I leaned in and forced a kiss, but soon enough he was kissing me back.

"Noel." He had drunk water, waiting for his operation when he spotted me and Michael entering the room.

"Nikita.. MICHAEL!" He leapt for his gun, but I quickly stepped in front of Michael. Noel wouldn't hurt me. He couldn't.

"Noel, calm down. I'll explain everything right after our surgery. Just put the gun down." I held out my hand for him to give me the gun, but the hatred in his eyes was uncanny. Why would he hate Michael? I mean it makes sense why Michael hates Noel, but the other way around is confusing me.

"Nik, why is he here? Are you being set up? I will kill him." Before I could even muster up an explanation Michael spoke.

"Noel, you should just lower your gun. I wouldn't wanna hurt you." I turned to give Michael a dirty look.

"Look, Noel he's not gonna hurt you, or me. He wouldn't."

"How do you know he-" he looked from me to Michael and I'm guessing if this were a cartoon, a lightbulb would light up above his head. He knows.

"Wait a minute. Are you saying you two?" I smiled at Michael, and pecked his lips in a loving way. "Are you serious? I heard rumors from the guys but who knew they were true." Michael was the first to break our gaze off.

"What rumors?"

"About you two. Everybody liked you Nikki, and we all wanted to go out with you, but some of the men knew a rumor about you two being an item. Said they saw you two sparring or something, and the tension was off the charts. That's all I heard."

"Wow, babe." I directed my attention back to Michael. "I didn't know anybody knew about us..."

"I didn't know Division had a rumor mill." His attempt at joking did not fall on deaf ears, but I didn't laugh, only smirked. I pecked his lips one last time, and began to get out of my clothes and into the proper clothes for the surgery.

Noel's POV:

It was kind of hard to watch their dialogue. There was always an I love you, or a kiss, or a touch. I wish I could have that. I watched them go back and forth about I have absolutely no idea.

Nikita was laying on the operation bed, on her stomach. Michael was sitting in a chair facing her with less than 2 inches between them. They were both smiling like a bunch of drunks. Nikita's voice was the first I heard.

"Babe, you don't have to stay here." She began to stroke his face with her fingers.

"Yes I do. I told you I'm not leaving your side, baby." He took her hand in his, and rubbed it with his thumb.

"I know you don't want to leave my side, and it makes sense. I'm gonna miss you just as much as you'll miss me." She leaned in and they began kissing, for a long time. This was definitely the first time I've felt jealous, but also the first time I'd seen Michael, not being evil. He's gentle with her, he takes care of her, he loves her. I can see that she feels the same way. How can I compete with that? She was supposed to just be my friend but her happy-go-lucky attitude just makes me happy. It's so familiar. Kind of like my sisters. I realised I was staring at them when Michael let a scoff out of his mouth.

"Sorry, I was just.. Drifting." Nikita began to look concerned.

"Are you okay Noel?" She asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine, I was just thinking about my sisters." She stood up off of the tables, and scrunched down to look me in the eyes. She could see the grief in my eyes, and honestly I wasn't trying to hide it.

"Noel-"

"I'm fine." She didn't believe me, and I sat up so I could try to get myself together, but as soon as my bed had an empty space, she sat and hugged me. I didn't hug her back because I was stuck thinking about my sisters, but I felt her rubbing my arms.

"Noel, look at me." When I looked up, I couldn't completely see her due to my tears. "This was not your fault, okay? You did not fail them. You tried your hardest to protect them, at a young age."

I nodded in agreement. "I know, I know. It's just hard, you know." I hate talking about my sisters but with Nikita it feels like second nature.

She hugged me for a long time, before looking me in the eyes again. "Are you okay?" My mouth was left agape, as walked in, interrupting our conversation.

"Oh, good your here." Nikita jumped off my bed and walked towards Michael, standing next to him. He took her waist and pulled her closer to him. As she talked, he kissed her hair, and stroked her waist up and down, and even from behind I could see the smile on her face.

"You're late." She said, still smiling.

"I know, I'm sorry." He looked from her to Michael.

"It's cool. Oh this is Michael." Michael used his free hand to shake Darwin's.

"Nice to meet you. I'm ." He looked at Nikita wierd, signaling that he was worried about Michael being a rat.

"Oh don't worry, Michael is just here as my support." She pecked his lips, and I couldn't help the growl that erupted from my mouth.

"Okay. Well who's first?" She looked back at me, but I honestly didn't want anymore time spent watching the lovebirds, so I volunteered.

"I will." He looked towards my way, and began to approach me.

"Painkillers, or not?" Hmm, I don't know. I was a drug addict.. No, no I'd rather endure the pain then get on drugs again.

"No. I'll do without." As if sensing my inner turmoil, she looked my way. I mouthed to her 'I'll be fine, don't worry'. She smiled at that, and her boy toy began to huff in her ear or something because they started getting frisky. She started laughing, and tickling his side, so I looked away.

Nikita's POV:

Michael was acting too cute for words. The hugging, the kissing, the playing. It was all making me love him even more.

Noel was doing his surgery first, so we had some time alone. Their was a curtain between us, and Noel so we were practically alone. I guided Michael to the bed, and we began kissing like we were each others' air. His hands, always remained on my waist, my neck, or my hair. My hands were on his neck, feeling his abs, or going through his hair. It felt so natural kissing Michael. Tongues doing the worm, satisfaction higher than the stars, pleasure everywhere. God, he knows just how to handle a women. It started to get unbearable feeling his clothes, so I slowly guided his jacket off of his shoulders. I slowed down the kiss before things got too heated too fast. I leaned back so that he was now on top of me, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He started straddling my hips, and I couldn't hold in the moan that escaped my mouth. Michael sucking on my neck snapped me out of my bliss. I pushed him off of me a bit, and began to breathe deeply.

"What's wrong." He said.

"Michael, we're in a hospital, right next Noel, and Darwin. We can't do this here." He huffed in frustration, then pushed his hair out of his face.

"I know. I just- I love you. So much." He moved closer to me, and pulled me on top of his lap.

"I love you too." I got closer to his face and started whispering in his ear provocatively. "And when we get home, we will finish this." Then I bit his ear lobe, and he squirmed like a fish outside of its tank.

"All done." We heard from the other side of the curtain. He slid the curtain away so we could see Noel, sleeping, and all stitched up.

"Oh baby I forgot I'll be sore after.." I looked at Michael, and as we stood off the bed, I grabbed his belt, bucking our pelvis' together and said. "Now I'm gonna have to give it to you extra hard, huh?" He swallowed nervously, and kissed me with hungry lust. "Oh yeah babe, you owe me." He pecked my lips one last time before my surgery had to begin.

"Are you okay baby?" I had been asleep for about one hour, but through the pain, it felt like five.

"Yeah, I'm good. Just feels like I got stampeded by a herd of elephants." We both laughed at my humorous remark. Michael was again sitting in a chair facing me.

"You're gonna be fine. As soon as you take these painkillers." He could clearly see the denial on my face, because he became serious instantaneously. "Nikki-"

"No. I refuse to take them.. You know why I can't, Michael." He began to stroke my face. I leaned into his touch, and he whispered, "I know. I'm sorry you're in pain."

"I know." I scooched over, and directed Michael to lay next to me, since this bed was huge, and we intertwined our fingers. "You know, I never thought that in a million years I'd meet someone like you. I was in foster care and on drugs my whole life. Meeting someone that loves me unconditionally wasn't apart of the plan. I honestly thought I'd die on drugs, or die from my kidney's, never meeting my soul mate. Never having someone to hold, who knows how to love me without instructions. You gave me your heart, I know I'm loved by you. You are the most amazing person I know. You are irreplaceable. I wasn't whole until I met you, and now the thought of becoming a half again scares the hell out of me. I hate this so much. I hate that we both have to do what we have to do and it doesn't involve us. It just involves you, then me. I- I'm gonna miss you more than I think my heart can bear. I love you so much! You've changed every aspect of my life. Going places without you feels unfamiliar, and naked. I never get to feel full happiness unless I'm with you. I love you Michael."

I couldn't prevent the tears from falling. His face was drained of all emotion, but it all made sense when we kissed. Chest to chest, heartbeats in sync, both hands on each others faces pulling closer and closer together. Our breathing was even at the same pace. I smiled onto his lips at the thought of his being this perfect for each other. I allowed a tear to slip from my closed eyes at the thought of not getting this attention every day. I could feel Michael going through the same conflict as he tried to pull me even closer to our already put together bodies. We fit perfect together like a puzzle. We're like to halves of a circle. It's like we were actually made together and separated at birth. Not like Siamese twins, but like the perfect combination of love.

Our kiss became extremely heated so Michael carried me away from Noel and Darwin. Breaking the kiss was not a disappointment at all. We just stared into each others eyes. "I love you." Michael finally said. I began to kiss him again, as we lay in an abandoned bed across the hall from where Noel lay.

He lay me down on the bed, and crouched over me as we began to kiss. His tongue entered my mouth as he hopped on the bed and lay on top of me. He was stroking my hair, and had his hand on the small of my back. He flipped us over so he wouldn't overpower me with his weight. I'm guessing he forgot about my current stitching, because he wouldn't be so rough, but hey I wasn't complaining. We began to undress each other. Shirts, pants, socks, shoes, and undergarments flew everywhere. We had never made love so slow. It was loving, not passionate. I had never felt this way about anyone, but now I know what they mean when they say that sex is best when it's with the one you love.

Afterwords, we lay together spooning and enjoying the night. We didn't talk but it was a peaceful, unadulterated silence. Just lovers enjoying the feel of one another's bodies.

Michael began to suck on my neck, as he did before. He flipped me over so we were now face to face, and he gawked at my body. "God, I love you." I of course smiled, and intertwined our fingers. "You're making this much, much harder." I said as he started drawing circles on my torso. "I know." He said.

"I'm sorry this has to happen between us. If there was any way to meet in the middle with this, you need to know I would do it in a heartbeat. Especially if it meant getting to do this forever." His hand rested on my waist and we stared into each other's eyes in a completely naked stare off. I smirked like a kid before breaking our gaze, and skimming his body. "I wish this could last forever. It hurts that it may be the only way." My eyes began to tear up, and surprisingly so did Michael's. His eyes used to be so bright, and full of love, but it's as if he's already picturing his life without me. "What if something happens to you when you go? Nikki, you and I both know I cannot lose another person I love. I have never, ever loved another person as much as I love you. You're perfect and maybe you don't see yourself as that but you are. You are my other half and I do mean it literally . You are seriously my other half. You are the only thing that can calm me down if I'm mad. You are innocent yet deadly. Beautiful, but you can get down with men. You are a star, a twinkling star. You are angelic, and the.. Words can't even describe how much I love you. I love you doesn't even seem like enough to say. It's not deep enough because without you I'm dead. I cannot think about what I would do if anything or anyone hurt you. You are my only weakness and the only thing I could honestly thank Division for is you. You are my everything. You. Are. My. Everything." The tears could fall as much as they want. I couldn't care less. I flung my body on top of his, and began to kiss him like he was about to die. I kept saying 'I love you' in his ear, and he kept saying it back, while his arms held me against him in a death grip.

"Did you rip your stitches due to last nights activities?" asked. I looked at Michael who was currently holding my waist, while my back was against his chest. He was blushing and so was I.

"No, I-we- uh no. I'm good." I smiled back at Michael, and playfully pushed his chest with my elbow. He was kissing the back of my head, and rubbing my side with his hand that was on my waist.

"Where's Noel?" As if in cue, Noel stepped out from behind a curtain, yawning. Michael's hold on my waist tightened. I giggled a bit at that.

"Here, here." Noel saluted like a soldier. The doctor pulled us on separate sides of the curtain and checked our stitches.

"Well you're all set." Darwin smiled at us, and we thanked him before exiting the hospital and heading our separate ways. Me with Michael, and Noel with himself.

"So, what should we do now?" Michael asked when we entered his apartment.

"Well I can think of a few things." I said provocatively before racing him to the bed, and doing nothing else but sleeping until 8 to go to Division for my last official day.

When we both woke up, Michael was whispering funny memories between the two of us.

"Do you remember the first time we met?" I asked him.

"Of course. A lot has happened since then, but I could never forget when you entered my life. You were wearing a yellow sports bra .. black leggings, and flats. You looked sexy without even trying. Our first date, I bought you calla lilies, and you wore a very sexy red, silky, backless dress. You looked amazing, and I will never forget that day."

"Why?" I turned a bit to look at his face.

"Because it was the first day I started to fall in love with you."

* * *

Loooong chapter right? Next one won't be that long, hopefully. This took a lot of few hours!

Review!


	17. Escape:Part 2

3rd to last chapter... :(

Escape:Part 2

Waking up felt extremely surreal. His arms surrounding my whole body like a blanket was a future I would have wished for months ago, but I guess you can't always get what you want. But sacrificing your love for your humanity, or better yet your values, seems incoherent.

"Good morning." I shifted my body weight over to my left, so that I could get a better view of Michael's face.

"Morning." I said, as I let a smile dance across my face when I saw his face even scruffier than ever. He began to smile humorously which confused me.

"What's so funny?" The confusion on his face was out of humor.

"Nothing, it's just… Uh, I love you." I scooted closer towards him so that our faces were not even centimeters apart. Our noses brushed, and he replied;

"I love you more." I pecked his lips, before shifting back, so that we were spooning. He nestled his nose into my shoulder, and kissed it before drifting off into an even deeper slumber.

"Hey nerd." The nerd was effortlessly typing on his obnoxiously loud keyboard when I walked in the room.

"Nikki. What's up?" He hadn't even turned around to look at me, which at the time seemed weird, but later on I understood why.

"Nothing much… Are there any upcoming ops?" Since we were in the room alone, he felt the need to put all of his cards on the table.

"Why would you care? I mean it's not like you're gonna be here to lend a helping hand, or anything." What the-

"Nerd, I have no idea what you are talking about." He still hadn't even attempted to revert his attention towards me, and honestly it was starting to piss me off.

"Well allow me to enlighten you."

"Well it would be gratefully appreciated!" My sarcasm level probably reached heaven.

He abruptly stood from his chair, making it swirl like the marry-go-round, and replied, "You know exactly what I am talking about. I just can't believe you didn't even have to heart to tell me." He went from furious, to hurt within the blink of an eye. I now knew exactly what he was talking about, but a spy doesn't reveal her lies til' it's absolutely vital.

"Nerd, for the last time: What the hell are you talking about?" He took a step closer to me, I'm guessing to make a more dramatic scene.

"You are escaping Division?" So, my theory was correct? Can't say I'm too happy about it though; I could not deal with any more dramatic goodbye's, so I just nodded my head, and pointed my gaze towards the ground, where my feet remained.

"Why didn't you just tell me?"

"Really nerd? You went through the training just as I did, and you just asked that? I didn't tell you because I needed a clean getaway without any liabilities. I can't have anyone else get hurt because of my crap. I care about you too much to let you get involved." We had actually never hugged, so I guess that thought made me crave some nerdy affection.

I only had to take a step forward to close the gap between us, and I wrapped my arms around his neck, in an almost romantic hug, except it was with Birkhoff, which could never under any circumstances turn romantic.

"Nerd, I needed you to stay safe and in the clear. If they were to question you, and you had information on me, they would get it out of you easily. It's inevitable." He broke our hug and gave me an offended look.

"Really Nikki?" I saw this as my opportunity to make a joke.

"Yes, inevitable. More inevitable than a prostitute having sex again." We both got a chuckle out of my snarky remark.

"How'd you find out anyways?" I asked him, when the silliness died down.

"You don't need to know that." I raised my eyebrow at him, but he just ignored it, reeling the tension back into the conversation like a fishing rod: swiftly, and with a lot of technique.

"When are you leaving?" His now glassy-looking eyes warmed my heart.

"Tomorrow. 0900. "

"How are you going to do it, Nikki? I mean not to be a bubble buster-"

"Bubble buster? Really?" He chuckled again, and continued on.

"But, you are a tortoise going up against a hare." Birkhoff said, sarcastically.

"Well, if you had actually read the whole story, you'd know the tortoise won because of a lot of strategy, stamina, and heart. I have all the factors for me... What does Division have?" I didn't give him a chance to answer back, as I walked out of operations, into the training area.

After I had changed, and headed to the mats, I was reunited with some of my old friends.

As I was sparring with some chick named Kenna, a guard yelled my name. I ignored him until I got the drop on Kenna after she inaccurately repositioned her posture into a less secure one. I dropped down and kicked her feet from under her, and held my foot against her neck, as a sign of her demolish.

"Nikita!" I turned around, elegantly, and gave the guard an irritated look.

"What?"

"Michael wants to see you in his office." Damn I could be an actress, because at the mention of Michael's name, my heart fluttered. I'm sure my attitude was reflected, but I almost didn't care. It was my last day anyways.

I made my way to Michael's office, still sweating like I was in the oven; He was leaning against his desk, practically waiting for me. I quickly, but quietly closed the door, and grinned mischievously at my baby.

"Hey, boss. You wanted to see me?" I walked seductively toward my love, and slid my hands from his shoulders, to his muscle toned chest.

"Yes." He placed his hands on my waist, and rubbed the tender spot that always made me purr like a cat. "Me, you, dinner, tonight, sound good?"

"Mmm, yes." The other week Michael had found this tender spot on the side of my stomach, and just as I thought he was moving his hands up to touch something else, he started softly tickling me. I reacted like any other person would. I squirmed like a suffocating fish.

I had unnoticeably ended up on the floor, while Michael tickled the baJesus out of me.

"MICHAEL! STOP! PLEASE!" He had finally stopped tickling me, and had just stared at me laugh my way back into humanity.

"What?" After I had caught my breath, I had noticed him smiling down on me.

"I'm gonna miss this." Slowly, but surely I began to get more and more sad, until I was practically in tears.

"Michael, don't." He looked down upon me with love filled eyes that turned out to be reassuring.

"What is gonna happen to us? I mean I can't just not see you for a year. You know I would go mad without you." I reached up as he reached down, and we shared a loving kiss. The intensity was not of this world. The fire, the spark, it felt like a supernatural love. People couldn't even dream of passion like this. It was just amazing how when he stuck his tongue into my mouth, I anticipated his move, and had my mouth already opened for him. It was amazing how; simultaneously we reached for each other's necks. It's exhilarating how he and only he could make me feel this way. When air was essential, we, as always, simultaneously pulled apart, and rested our foreheads together.

"We'll work it out, okay? I love you and I will not allow this to completely tear us apart. I will never let that happen." I pulled him closer to peck his lips. He, in return embraced me with more warmth than ever before.

"Nikita!"

"OMG! Noel!" My snarky, sarcastic reply did not go unnoticed.

"Baby, I have missed you!" He playfully replied. He picked me up, and threw me over his shoulder. I wanted to protest, but for some reason this humored me. I started to laugh, and he was enjoying it a bit too much.

When the drug-like giggles stopped, I started to re-evaluate this situation. It was very normal for a boyfriend but not so much a friend to hold me like this.

"Noel put me down." I started softly punching his back.

"Not until you beg me." Uh, hell no! I have too much pride for that.

"Absolutely not. This request was merely a warning for you. Either you put me down, or I force you." He let out an idiotic sounding laugh, which made me laugh.

After a while we were just laughing, as I allowed him to carry me to wherever it was that he was taking us.

"We're here." He slowly lowered me to the ground like I was his newborn child, or something. I looked around and took in my surroundings. How I didn't notice where we were headed still amazes me. This cemetery brings back terrible memories, but if I'm going on the run, this is probably the first place they'll look. A particular tombstone, with millions of flowers caught my eye.

"Daniel." I can't believe we're here. I haven't mentioned or thought about Daniel for a very long time.

"I-how did you know where his tombstone was?" Instead of answering my question, he gave me his morals behind bringing me here.

"You know, my siblings never got a proper funeral. They just kept them in the morgue. My mother is a small dot in London, and I have no idea if she's dead or not, and even though she practically ruined my life, I needed to say bye to her for a feeling of closure… I know you loved Daniel, and I know you will probably regret everything that happened every single day, but everyone needs a bit of closure, so we're here so you can get the proper goodbye that I was never given."

"Thank you." His beautiful words made me tear up, and I hugged him for a few seconds before returning my attention to Daniel's tomb.

I knelt down to get a better view of it, and began to speak.

"Daniel where to begin? I mean you were the first man to love me without even knowing the real me. You saw the good in me, and had an open mind, and an open heart. I can't believe I was lucky enough to meet someone as amazing as you." A sad smile danced across my face as a tear expeditiously slid down my cheek. "This will probably be the last time I talk to you, because you see, I've found the strength to walk away… Maybe someday when I forgive myself for all the pain I'm sure I caused you, I will come back. I will always love you, Daniel." I stood from where I knelt, and Noel slid a white rose into my hand. I gave him a nod, as a thank you, and placed it upon Daniel's tomb. "Goodbye Daniel."

We were walking back to the street to catch a cab, when Noel suddenly stopped, and went all dear-in-the-headlights on me.

"Noel?" I tried to shake his shoulders but he would not move. His eyes were just caught on something in the distance. I hadn't bothered to direct my attention toward whatever it was that he was gazing at, but when I finally did, that look on his face made since.

"Oh my goodness." I was in awe. There stood, what I pictured in my mind to be a ghost, but she was in fact standing right before us. She walked slowly across the street, but when she got too close for my comfort, I stepped in front of Noel, and gave her a threatening glare.

"Ahh, Nikita. I've heard so much about you." What the-

"Felicity?" I had not expected Noel to say anything, due to his shock, but even an old person with a hearing aid could hear the thick accented shaky voice that escaped his mouth.

"Brother. I didn't expect you to be such a bitch about seeing me again, but hey, you were the one that attempted to kill me."

* * *

Sorry Guys, I just haven't done a cliffhanger in a while, but I promise the next chapter won't disappoint.


	18. Conclusion

Soooo sorry for the wait, but with it being the second to last chapter, I've had writer's block... I will try to update the last chapter within 2 weeks. Enjoy! :)

Conclusion

"Michael! Michael, are you here?" I was speed walking through Michael's apartment trying to see if he was home, but he was nowhere to be found.

I turned around to walk out the door, when my heart started beating even more expeditiously. My feelings kept piling up like a damn game of janga.

The door quickly flung open just as I was about to grab my gun. I leapt behind his counter as fast as I could, only to realize it was Michael himself. As soon as he closed the door, I revealed myself, and he momentarily became startled. He put his hand over his chest motioning the fear he felt.

"Oh my goodness, Nikita you scared the living daylights out of me!" As soon as I saw his majestic face, my emotions boiled over. I opened my arms and ran up to him, wrapping my arms around his neck, and my legs around his pelvis.

"Hey, hey what's wrong?" He began caressing my hair, and rubbing my back and it actually made my worries _whoosh _out of my head.

After I was able to stop my flowing tears, I told him what happened earlier.

Flashback:

"I killed her?" Noel was beginning to buy into Felicity's lies. I could not have that so my 'stay out of it' attitude finally went away.

I turned around and took Noel's face into my hands, and he looked down at me.

"Noel, she's lying. Her story doesn't make any sense. You've spent years feeling guilty about your sisters... There's no way you did it."

"Maybe the real reason I felt so guilty is because I did it." I was too quickly losing my side of this argument.

"Well then, how is your mother-"

"She abandoned us when you turned 19, Noel. She hated us. She wasn't a prostitute at all." Felicity cut in. I turned around quickly, flipping my hair in Noel's face.

"Why are you lying? Why did you even come back?"

"Hallucinations,  
it's not just something that happens. Our father had the same thing. It's due to lack of sleep."

"Now why wouldn't he be sleeping?" She gave me an 'are you an idiot' look, so I raised my eyebrows to speed up her reply.

"Well I don't know? A 19 year old boy's mother leaves him the responsibility of being a parent to his younger siblings; I mean who wouldn't crack under pressure? He became distant, and started doing drugs. We were young and didn't like him because he was snappy, so we never asked questions. One night though, our brothers got into a fight with the wrong people and were murdered," for once in this whole story, I saw a glimpse of remorse in her eyes. "We all grieved for the better half of 2 years. Then one night, Noel here came home drunk as hell, and him and Jennifer got into a fight. He grabbed a knife, and ended her life. Then our other sister Natasha, well she was so loyal to Jen, that she decided to take her own life. They left me. Alone." As soon as I thought maybe she does have a heart, she looked up, and the sadness was gone. He face only revealed a fake smile.

"Now, I'm here to get you, and help you get back to normal." She reached her hand out for Noel, and I slapped it away.

"You're not taking him. He will go where he wants to go." I had actually forgotten Noel was right behind me until I saw his hand reach out for Felicity's. I turned around, now focusing my attention on Noel.

"Noel, what are you doing?" My eyes became thick with tears, at the thought of him leaving me.

"I'm sorry Nikita." He reached out to touch the tear that slid down my face as a sign of actual understanding.

"No, no, you can't be leaving, Noel, she's lying!" He let a sad smile play across his face.

"She's not…. It all makes sense to me now. I, I've been hiding from the truth. Now I can face it, whole heartedly."

"Stop….. please!" I stepped forward to touch him, but he reacted like I was being invasive.

"I'm sorry. I just- I can't go with you."

"Why not? Because she tells you all these lies?" He closed his eyes in disbelief, and let his hand land on my face, as gentle as dust.

"Do you love me?"

"Noel-"

"Just tell me the truth, one last time, just tell me the truth." His eyes were pleading for me to just say yes, but if I did, I would be going against everything I believe in.

"No." His hand slowly slid down my face and he closed his eyes letting a tear escape. "I'm sorry."

"Me too."

Present:

"Before I could finish my thought, I guess Felicity knocked me out." I was now sitting on Michal's lap, telling him about what happened earlier.

"I'm so sorry, Nikita." I lifted my head off his shoulder, and he began to wipe my tears away.

"Me too." I repeated me and Noel's dialogue from earlier. "Michael, I could really use a partner on the outside." He stilled instantly. I already knew what he was gonna say before he said it. When his eyebrows furrowed, and his moth opened, I put my finger over his mouth, signaling for him to not talk.

"I know what you're going to say. Don't" He looked down, avoiding my eyes.

"I love you." He said, and looked up studying my eyes.

I was tired of being sad, and feeling sad. "I don't wanna think about the future. I wanna think about the now."

_Beeep…._

_Beeep…_

_Beeep…_

I woke up with my alarm clock pissing me off. I reached over, and turned it off. I was again having dreams about the day I left, but I guess since Michael's birthday is today it makes sense.

As I pushed the my sweaty black locks out of my face,I heard tiny footsteps and looked over at a youthful, yet worried face.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, just a little reminder I get every time this year." Her face turned curious.

"You're period?" I started laughing until tears slid down my cheeks.

"Yeah cuzz my period gives me nightmares, and comes yearly, not monthly? No not my period." She rolled her eyes at my sarcasm, and let the tension flood from her body.

"Then what-"

"Don't worry about it."

"Sensei, why are you so secretive?" To my dismay, it wasn't anger that directed her irrelevant question, it was simply her eagerness to know me better.

"I'm not. I just wanna keep your eye on the ball, and if you wanna make that work-" She cut me off.

"You have to leave your feelings at home, I know." I could tell she had given up on her attempt to get a glimpse of my personal life.

"Gold star." I said before leaping out of my bed, and hopping in the shower.

After I was in bra and panties, I walked over to my clothes rack and picking out the most dressy but casual attire. I remember Michael saying I looked better in bright colors, so I picked out the brightest color I had, which was sadly only a dark sapphire dressy shirt. I threw on some leggings, because I didn't plan on wearing them for a long time, and I slipped my boots on, and my leather jacket, and headed towards the door. Before I walked out, Alex asked me, yet another nosy question.

"Where are you going?" I stopped and smiled, before answering her question with as much detail as she needed.

"A birthday party… Be back by tomorrow at 05:00... Don't wait up" I said the last phrase as I made my way out the door, and locking it with my key.

Michael's POV:

My birthday had been going crappy, from the idiotic recruits, to Birkhoff annoying the hell out of me.. Since it was my Birthday, Percy actually let me leave early. It was a shocker, but I couldn't run out of there quicker.

I put my key in the lock, a little hesitantly, and opened the door. What was before me was a complete surprise. There she was. The women I had been longing for for a whole year. Ever since the last time she came, I have been missing the heel out of her. She was smiling and looking as beautiful as the most perfect angel in Heaven.

"Happy Birthday."

* * *

Like it, hate it? Leave a review and tell me. Last chapter next! :(


	19. Remember Me

Soo, as you know this is the last chapter. It's been funn, and I think you are all awesome, so enjoy, and try not to cry, =…(

Remember Me

"Happy Birthday." She said, as she held a rather attractive looking cupcake in front of her torso. I took a slow step forward, and shut the door.

"I knew you came last year, but I wasn't expecting a repeat." Her smile never flinched, not even a bit. I'm guessing her smile wouldn't fall until I blew the candle, but if I could see only her breathe-taking smile every day, I would.

I slowly took the cupcake from her hand and blew out the candle. It was now pitch dark, so I made my way towards the light switch. I flicked it on, quickly and the room was suddenly much more cheerful. It had confetti, and a banner, as if we were gonna have a party. I was so busy gazing at my now blue living room; I hadn't noticed her turn on waltzing music. I directed my attention towards my angel, and she held her hand out for me to take. I approached her with every intention of just feeling her lips, but she was having none of that. She smoothly, but quickly took my hand, planted it on her waist, and held the other one in her hand. Honestly the only time I felt something so soft was when I had to change Hayley's diaper. Her hand felt like home, and I have always known that, but have been too cowardice to come with her.

We swayed to the music, in a love strung need for reassurance.

"I still can't believe you're here." As I said this, a smile slowly wisped across her face. She didn't look up, but her head on my shoulder let me feel what she was feeling. Happiness, Warmth, undeniable, unadulterated, inhumane, unstoppable love. I felt it too.

"I couldn't miss your birthday. I mean, when I- you know- return, we might not ever be able to do this again. I can't take advantage of the last freedom I've got."

I nodded in agreement, and I closed my eyes, feeling completely at ease.

"I love you." At my sudden revelation, her heart started to beat fast. I pulled away from her a bit, to see her face full of tears.

"Why is this, such a surprise? You know you're my world. You know this." She started nodding, and smiling on and off.

"I know, I know. It's just that I haven't seen you in forever, and with me leaving, I thought I'd never hear those words again…" I thought back on the day she left, and how much it hurt me.

Flashback:

"Nikita, do you have to do this?"

She was trying so hard not to cry, but when she saw my face, she just sobbed uncontrollably. She nodded slowly, trying to catch he breathe. I pulled her against my chest, trying to be her anchor that I'm sure she'd lost so many times.

"I'm sorry, Michael. If I could go back and make sure you never had to meet me, I would." Well that felt like a whale being dropped on my head, while a big balloon expanded in my stomach. I felt a sudden need to let her know how much that would ruin my life.

"Nikita, do you know why I'm still here?"

"Well, to get revenge for your family." She said as she attempted to wipe her tears while some continued to flow from her eyes. I walked towards her, and swept her up in my arms, placed her on my countertop, and made sure our faces were close enough for me to kiss her.

"I'm here because of you. My family is just a constant reminder of everything I've lost. You are my anchor. You are the flowers to my garden, the bed to my room. You are my heart and soul… You are everything to me..." I took a small pause to kiss her beautiful, now salty tasting lips. She parted them so her tongue could escape the cage that was her teeth. I opened mine, and we explored each other's mouths, knowing it was the last kiss we'd probably ever share. As I pulled away, I saw the smallest piece of disbelief, so I tried even harder to make her feel my love. "When it rains, I wanna scream at the world to make you stay. When I think of not seeing you every day, it makes me wanna sweep you up, and take you away from the cruel world, into domestic bliss. When I see you, I feel like locking you up somewhere, to keep you away from this ugly world. Sometimes, when I see your smile, I wish I could just stare at it forever." She chuckled softly, but then, I'm pretty sure the thought of her leaving came to mind, and she remembered the actions she was about to take. I cupped her smooth cheeks in my hands, and started telling her, again how much she means to me. "You are this beautiful angel that haunts my dreams, and makes all my worries go away. Nothing in this world is more perfect than you. In my eyes, all I see is you. I'm probably addicted to your touch," I stroked her face with my thumb, "your warmth," I grabbed her hands, and pressed my lips against them, while closing my eyes, in yearning. "Your lips," I pecked her lips, and finished my speech that probably took as long as the inauguration. "And just everything about you. Even if you left this fight, and ventured on to a non-expedition country, I'd remember everything about you. Your beautiful lips that taste of sugar, and cinnamon. Your long, and luxurious hair, as dark as night. Your muscle toned body, which I still believe was built just for me." As my hands venture onto her stomach, my words caught her ears, causing her to chuckle. There goes that smile. "Your legs, that are longer than the Eiffel tower. And your heart, as big as the sun." My hands felt her heart beat, and it gave me relief that it had slowed down. "As soon as this stops beating," I took her hand in mine, and made her hand feel my heart beat. "Mine does too. You make me happier than any person has ever been, so don't take that away from me." She knew that my words were meaning that 'no matter what happens, you have to fight for your life; for both of ours.' "Never doubt how much I love you. Never." I pulled her close to me, so that I could hold her in my arms. She started crying happy tears, and to my dismay, so did I. I wish her leaving could be a dream I could wake up from. I wish every day I could wake up holding her in my arms, whispering I love you, maybe having babies one day, but I guess this cruel world has other plans. I was now crying like a girl, but I could care less. The women I loved was about to leave me for what I'm guessing will be many years.

"Why can't we just stay like this forever?" She said, trying to choke down her tears.

"Because this world hates us." She smiled a bit, and it made my world light up like a candle. "Will I see you soon?" I had to ask her, because getting my hopes up, won't help anybody.

"You will. Or at least I'll see you. I will make sure we see each other, because not seeing you for years at a time is torture." She said.

"Ok." We simultaneously pulled away, and gazed into each other's eyes.

"I will never feel this peace ever again, huh?" She asked. Took her hands in mine, and tried to respond with enough love, that she will be able to leave, because at this point, she's worn out from the stress, and even though I would love nothing else than for her to stay, I know that can't happen.

"I don't know what will happen when you leave, and we may change, but I know that someway, somehow, we will find our way back to each other. When that day comes, baby, I'm never letting you go." she smiled, happily this time, and cupped my face in her hands.

"I love you." She said, as a tear slipped down her face, showing that it was all over now. She can finally let go.

"I love you more." I said, as I hugged her tight enough so that I could carry her outside, to her car.

When we were outside and her bags were all put away, we hugged one last time, and I couldn't help but feel the misery creeping up to my heart. I pulled her tighter against my chest, and buried my head into her shoulder.

"Close your eyes." She said.

"No. I want to see it. I need to see it." I heard her chuckle a sad chuckle.

"No, you wanna see so you can remember, and I don't want you to remember. It will crush you to watch, so close your eyes. When you open them, it'll all be over."

"No, please."

"Michael, just do it. I promise."

"Okay." I felt her slowly slip from my arms, and I was about to reach for her, when I felt lips upon mine. I lost myself in the feeling so much, that the last thing I remember was hearing a car engine. When I opened my eyes, she was gone, and the beginning of the worst months of my life began.

Present:

We were now lying on my bed, just gazing into each other's eyes, slightly peeking into our souls.

"I don't know why, but every time I see you, I see a halo floating right above your head." She smiled, egotistically, so I changed my position, and layed flat on top of her, not even attempting to hold my weight up. Our faces were centimeters apart, and she was obviously loving every second of it sense her smile had turned flirty.

"Oh baby, you've gotten cocky over this year, huh?" She just smiled harder, and made a 'mmhmm' face, so I decided to wipe that cocky look off her face.

I lifted up her shirt, and put my mouth against her stomach, and blew really hard, so it made a loud noise. She started laughing, and I finally got what I wished for. Hearing her laugh is the thing that I had been striving for this year. I had missed her so bad that it was literally driving me crazy. I kept visualizing her face, her voice, her lips, but I couldn't quite remember her laugh, and now I got to hear it again.

"Michael! Please!" She muttered, but I wasn't done yet. I wanted to hear it over and over and over again.

"Say you love me." I said as I kept blowing on her stomach.

"I... I love you." I suddenly stopped and before she could even think about catching her breathe, I took it away. I kissed her with all the adoration in the world. When I pulled away, I saw her staring at the clock that hung above my door frame.

"Ugh! Is it time for you to go, or do I get you for the rest of the night?"

"MM, that depends on how you treat me." She again, smiled egotistically.

"Oh, I think I treat you very well." I said, as I began sucking ferociously on her neck.

"Ahh, Michael I have food in the oven." I sucked even harder on her neck, and gave it a small vampire bite, making her yelp in both pain, and pleasure.

"I'm not hungry." The world must really hate me, sense right after I told her I wasn't hungry, my stomach growled.

Nikita laughed, but I just got frustrated.

"Please, not now. All I want is you. All I ever wanted was you." I said, as I continued my attack on her neck. I'm sure I was marking her, but I didn't know what kind of situation she was in at home, and if she had a man or someone living with her, I needed them to know she was taken. She will always be taken.

"Michael… Oh God…. You're marking me." She said in between moans.

"It can be my birthday gift." I said, taking a minute to look into her eyes. Oh dear God, she's beautiful. Her hair was sprawled all across my pillow, and as always, I wish she could be in my bed every day.

"Okay…. But not too hard. I always go home walking funny." I hadn't known I left her sore until now, but it wasn't a letdown at all. It was very much an ego boost.

I smiled at her, before capturing her lips in a passionate kiss, which led to her getting handsy with my torso. She was fiddling with my buttons, and for some reason the thought of food popped into my mind, and I thought back on seeing the oven.

"Nikita, when I walked in the oven wasn't on." I could tell she was annoyed with me talking, instead of kissing, but I needed to make sure we weren't about to run out of this place naked, watching my apartment building burn to the ground.

"Yes it was. I was cooking lasagna. I pressed the start button and… Damnit!" Her not pressing the bake button all but cracked me up. I started stroking her cheek to dismiss her frustration.

"Baby, it's okay. We can just order in later. Now bring those sweet lips back to me so I can have my other birthday gift." I was about to lean in, but I'm guessing she had a witty comment to make.

"So you've gotten like 3 gifts so far? This isn't a damn sweet 16." We were now both laughing, but mine was cut short at the sight if her hicky drying too fast. I leaned in, and started sucking, harder this time.

"Ahh, Michael." My name on her lips made me so 'happy' that I just couldn't resist taking her clothes off in an animal fashion. I ripped her shirt open, and she purred like a cat, making me 'happier' and I took off the rest of her clothes, as we had the best sex that has ever been had in this millennium.

We both plopped on the bed, and gasped hard trying to catch our breathe. After having extremely fast sex, you get very tired.

Our fingers were still intertwined, and I felt her tense up immediately. I looked over, but she avoided my gaze.

"What's wrong, Sweetie?" She got even tenser at her nickname. "Nikita-"

"I just don't want to feel the pain when I have to go." Leave it to Nikita to cut straight to the point. I rotated our bodies so we were face to face.

"Would you rather not see me at all?"

"It would make things easier," My heart dropped for a second before she finished her phrase. "But not seeing you at all would kill me. I needed this." I smiled before pulling her into my chest, so that she was lying on my arm that was wrapped around her naked back.

"Now go to sleep."

"Okay." Now it was my turn to tense up, and as if she sensed what emotional turmoil that stirred up, she said, "Don't worry. When you wake, I'll still be here."

I smiled and said one last thing before drifting off into a deep slumber.

"I love you."

"I love you too." She said, and we both fell asleep, wrapped up in each other's arms.

Nikita's POV:

"Where the hell are my pants?" I whispered to myself, as I looked around Michael's room.

As if on cue, two muscular arms pulled my down upon a cold lap. He wrapped his arms around my body, and started pecking my neck.

"Whatcha lookin' for, Angel?" I smiled and flipped around, so I was sitting as if I was going to straddle his lap.

"Pants. Can't go home without em'." He suddenly looked around for an escape from the sadness he was feeling. I felt it too.

"Yeah. Uh, I think I last saw them here." He made a movement for me to get off his lap, so I complied; not even attempting to make him feel better, because we both knew the only way to end this depression is to stay together.

"Here" He said, handing me my pants, not even daring to glance in my direction.

"Babe-" He turned away, so his hard, sexy back was facing me.

"It's not you. I just thought maybe if I pushed you away, it would be easier when you leave, and I know it was stupid I'm sor-" before he could finish his sentence, I was kissing him again. It was slow, but really romantic. I pulled away for a second and he pecked my lips again, forcing my unwanted smile.

"Pushing me away will only piss me off, babe."

"I know, but being mad at me is better than missing me, eh?" I playfully slapped his Hulk looking arm, and said, "Not one bit." He smiled, which, of course made me smile.

When we were both done acting silly, he pulled me against his chest, "Mic-" before I could talk his lips really did crash into mine, in an uncoordinated manner. I slowly, and seductively slid my tongue into his mouth, for a hotter kiss than before. If I didn't have somewhere to be, I'm guessing this would lead to the bedroom and a happier me. Before my thought could become reality, I pushed him away, and grabbed my things.

Like the day I left, we were outside of my car. Michael was starting to look more depressed than the first time I left, and it was slowly breaking my heart.

My heart was racing fast at the question I was about to ask.

"Michael?"

"Yes, Hun?"

"Can you promise me something?" He looked worried, so he enveloped me in a tender embrace, and said,

"Anything for you."

"If I were to, you know, die from this war I'm about to start, I need to know that someone knew me, and loved me. I need you to remember me for who I am now, because this crusade may, or may not kill me." He looked sad, and I'm guessing it was the thought of my actual grave.

"I know you, better then I know myself, but I can't promise that I won't follow you to death." My heart was racing really fast now.

"Michael-"

"You can't honestly ask me to keep on living after my world was destroyed. That's like asking the sun to never shine again. Baby you are my everything. You are my sunlight, so promise me that you'll never give up. Never, because if someone kills you, they kill me." I nodded my head slowly.

"I know. I promise."

"So do I." We locked pinkies playfully, before I broke the happy mood.

"You know if I didn't have to go-" I said.

"You'd be here. I know. And me, you." He said, glancing around this beautiful city. "The next time I see you, will it be…"

"Yes." I said, letting him know that I was making my reappearance soon.

"Okay. You know that no matter how far this thing goes, I could never hurt you, right?" I stepped closer to him, and wrapped his arms around my waist, whilst placing mine on his shoulders.

"Of course, babe. I know you could never hurt me. That's the only thing I'm sure of right now."

"You can also be sure of how much I love you." I couldn't stop the smile from crossing my face.

"I know. And I love you, which brings me to this. 'You need to close your eyes'." He sighed, and began to get defensive.

"Nikita, I just wanna see you…"

"No, Michael. We both know that you would probably chase my car down the street and I can't have that." He sighed in defeat before closing his eyes.

As always, I stood on the ball of my foot, and lightly kissed his lips. This was our last kiss, so I put every ounce of love into it. I slid my tongue into his mouth, and purred like a cat when Michael's hands caressed the side of my stomach. I rested my elbows on his shoulders, and slowly slid a piece of paper into his back pocket.

He felt me touch his butt, so he pulled away and gave me a questioning look.

"Only use it when you really need me. Whether it's an emotional need or a physical need, I'll be your beckon call."

"Okay." I stepped out of his arms and whispered in his ear, "Goodbye Michael."

"Goodbye, Nikita." He said, with his still closed eyes.

I got into my car, and drove off, staring at him through the rearview mirror until I lost sight of him. A small tear slid down my face, as I thought about my lost lover.

"Are you okay, sensei?" I looked up at a friendly, youthful face, and replied.

"I will be. Just thinking about a wildflower."

"What are you...?"

"Nothing. Doesn't matter. What matters is, I've got a question for you." I said, getting up to grab two funny looking objects.

"Okay?"

"Do you wanna be the bunny or the piggy?"

Le Fin

I love you guy's soo much for guiding me through my first fan-fic! I'd like to thank my little sister that dropped my laptop and made me have to rewrite my longest chapter, my boyfriend for ALWAYS distracting me. -_-. Okay just kidding but the real thanks go to my fans and friends. Ilse, you're my girl, thanks for all the support, and 9I'm not gonna name everybody) but thanks EVERYONE! I love you guys, you are the best, and just to thank you guys, I'm gonna let you in on a secret…

I'M MAKING A SEQUEL TO 'JUST A MISSION!'

Be patient, it'll take a while but its coming… Thank you guys, soo much.

-Iris Elena's OUT! XD


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